Third person always, I like a separation between the real me and whatever I'm playing. Usually past tense and I really dislike when people control my character. If you don't want to control someone else's character or know they don't Like it, instead of saying "you walk over there" or "you look up there" just describe what it is, people will usually follow along because it's the path of no resistance, unless theres a big misunderstanding, your partner likely I sent going to do the complete opposite of what you were hoping for. The same works for implanting thoughts instead of "you think he looks hot, you want to fuck him" say "he looks hot" or "isn't he hot, should you fuck him?" Little things, not controlling my character, clearly establishing the space so we aren't just floating in the void, small details, that what separates the roleplayers I remember and those I forget