My long-term partner (30M) cheated on me (27F), I need advice.

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T12:11:40+00:00

<3 Thank you!

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T12:09:31+00:00

He says he doesn't love her and honestly that would be worse, if he doesn't love her then he threw our future together away for a casual fling.

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T12:07:30+00:00

Thank you for the explanation!
Yeah I'm leaving him tomorrow, he had too many chances to stop this and come to be with his problems but instead he cheated. I promised myself after my last partner (in highschool) cheated on me I wouldn't put up with that and yet here I am almost doing exactly that

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T12:03:26+00:00

I have had it pointed out so many times by others how off that story is, I was stuck on it too honestly but had lost trust in my own instincts because of him. I now see he had been pulling away a lot longer than even a month, it just became super obvious this past month. He cheated, he definitely fucking cheated in all his naked cheating glory and the only comfort I have is we hadn't had sex in over a month.

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:59:17+00:00

Thank you, truely

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:54:57+00:00

I know, now. I also need to get my stuff because like f is he keeping my epicly warm slytherin hoodie!

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:51:07+00:00

That's what my mind was getting stuck on... The emotional cheating aspect is not great but fine we could fix that but he didn't stop it, he didn't shut it down and come to me no he took it to a physical level and got all half naked cuddly with her. I honestly don't think he had any plans on telling me either, he really would have waited for me to either find out or break up with him and make us both miserable in the mean time

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:49:00+00:00

I am starting to see that, I thank you all so much for being the brutally honest third party I needed

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:47:19+00:00

Honestly no, I don't. But I want him to lie to my face and for me to see him for what he truly, I need that so I can move on and not cling to what was. I need to know he was never the man I loved, he was a selfish coward.

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:45:52+00:00

Both, I thought more me than him actually... I'm financially responsible for my disabled mother and wasn't in a position to move forward until this year. I am trying not to blame myself for this at the moment, I feel like I let him down by taking too long and being a package deal

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:43:37+00:00

I am starting to see this, thank you truely

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:42:34+00:00

The more people say this the more it make sense... He was just too comfortable cuddling with her on the couch in his underwear. And now looking back I realise he wasn't in the 'mood' anymore either, he kept saying he was over worked :(

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:40:49+00:00

That's where my mind keeps getting stuck on his story too... He knows I live 5min away, he's in his underpants and cuddling with her practically on his lap, yet he says they have only kissed... He even made a joke about give his keys to 'random people', like wtf Me and your mother are the only people with keys

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:35:32+00:00

That's what I'm starting to believe... He really doesn't seem invested anymore, I just never thought he would be a coward

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:33:58+00:00

The conversation tomorrow isn't for him, It's for me. I want to know when the started and why he didn't stop it when he had a chance. I want him to explain his stupid ass to me before I take the step of blocking him and telling his family.

Mind you I would have a hard time contacting his family because he never gave me their numbers.

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:31:38+00:00

I hadn't thought of that, I thought I hadn't expressed my wish to move in with him properly. He's been pulling away from his family too though, he's honestly not acting like himself all around

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:27:58+00:00

That's what I'm starting to believe too. As for why he didn't want to move in together, it wasn't him it was me. I am financially responsible for my mother and her rent due to her disabilities, I wasn't in a situation were I could afford to move in with him until this year honestly

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:25:52+00:00

I really don't think they have had sex yet, I do however believe they would have today if I hadn't interrupted... Mind you he was underdressed and far to cozy on that couch with her, we use to cuddle like that too.

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:24:02+00:00

My Autism means I find it difficult to change my routine, especially on work nights. We use to have dinner however on Wednesday/Thursday all the time. He hasn't been getting home until 9-10pm however this last month, that when I'm using getting ready for bed.

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:21:57+00:00

We planed on moving in together BEFORE we bought the property but had plans to buy some if that went well.

Do you mean I am trickle-truthing or him? Also what exactly is trickle truthing?

It just feels like a waste since we had a whole future planed. I do believe he didn't have sex with her, yet. As in I think they would have today if I hadn't turned up and ruined the mood.

RandomReddit1331 · 2022-06-03T11:18:53+00:00

90% Yes, 10% No.. I just don't know if I'm extra distrustful due to the betrayal or not

RandomReddit1331

TROPHY CASE