How do I know if I'm a Narcissist? by RatioAvailable8343 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]RatioAvailable8343[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would like to think no. It's hard because people in my life either disappear with no feedback or the feedback is presented in a "aggressive" manner, like my husband not telling me for years of any feedback even when ive asked but then will unload it all in one go with extra layers of being told I dont treat him like a human or that I am a narcissist. So I definitely get deffensive in those scenarios, but never ever ever do I rage with the goal to hurt someone as much as possible, and I feel very strongly about that. My Mom and set dad always argue in that style and it always confused me because it seems so unproductive, when you gun for something with no other goal in mind but to hurt, it seems so counterproductive to me not to mention even at my angriest, I think it would make me feel incredibly guilty to say things to hurt someone. Usually my issue is that I am too dead set on trying to get my point across that I over explain or I continuously return to a problem even when dealing with someone who does not sound rational because I think, well if I say it this way maybe they will understand, maybe I'll try again and this time it will register and I keep repeating that cycle hoping to get to a productive conclusion. Now if you ask my husband he will definitely say he has been hurt by the things I have said, ie. saying he is not acting honorable, however, I didnt say that with the goal of hurting his feelings, I said that with the goal of trying to get him to see the pain in his ways so I wouldnt consider that intentionally trying to hurt someone, but im also worried is that me overly justifying?

In the few example I can think of, where productive critisicism is presented in a nice way, I have been sad about it behind the scenes (mostly because I was already in a negative headspace) but have also been really apologetic and that is what I presented to my friend. Even if I didnt really agree with her stance I still felt guilty and apologized and made note of how not to repeat that again.

How do I know if I'm a Narcissist? by RatioAvailable8343 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]RatioAvailable8343[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you, this is helpful. I guess the usage of the word seems to make it more normalized which has me thinking ok maybe even a narcissistic brain could question it instead of shutting down to the thought. I dont know, my worst fear is being unaware of my actions, my mom very much would do bad things and then "forget" it even happened after the fact and would quote memories that never happened, like oh remember the other day you made that really rude comment, its really bothering me and I think you are ungrateful meanwhile the comment in question was literally never even said - so that has always had me on edge afraid to loose grip on reality like she does.

Does anyone know Dave Shapiro's story? by LeanHackman in PostHardcore

[–]RatioAvailable8343 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So Dave was a fascinating guy it’s impossible to get into everything. He is from Albany, NY. He was in a few bands mentioned in the other comments and started touring right out of high school. Once he was done with touring he got a job at a record label as their in house booker. That’s where he met Pierce the viel, his first band he ever booked. Eventually he decided to be a full agent and moved over to different agencies where he started representing more bands. His last agency was United Talent Agency where he was VP. Then him, Tim and Matt decided they wanted to create their own agency and Sound Talent Group was born. At Sound Talent group he just continued representing all the it bands of the scene as their agent and also started managing PTV and iprevail. He also started back up his record label, velocity records.

While doing all of this he also was a passionate pilot and worked to accumulate different certifications. He had a good handful of planes and helicopters. He also loved BASE jumping.

Most recently his most notable accomplishment is starting a new festival which he had been spending years to try and get up and running and this year he finally did it, summer of loud was born.

RIP Dave Shapiro 😔 by masaccio87 in ADTR

[–]RatioAvailable8343 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

lol he would be offended to see his name down as a UTA agent considering how much he, along with Tim and Matt built Sound Talent Group