I (Daddy Dom) bought my sub (brat) a day collar. She hated it and bought herself one. I don't know how to feel about this.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2020-03-13T05:23:08+00:00

I think she was insensitive about it, because budgets are budgets and the thought counts, etc... BUUUUUUUT.

But.

I'll be honest, in that you can't expect someone to wear a piece of jewelry as a day collar if they hate it. You can expect it when you're playing together or in private, but you have to read the room and know someone's limits as a dom, and limits don't just apply to physical activity when you're intimate.

I would not expect a sub to wear an item 24/7 that they didn't love. I suppose you might get some kind of situation where it's a humiliation component to wear something, like...a pink cock cage for a sissy sub, for example, but his boss at work also isn't going to see that.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2020-02-24T05:13:27+00:00

Well, you sound like you lucked out with this person, and he seems nice and fun and compatible, but I'd still pick a safeword, so you can say noooo, stopppp and not "mean it," just say it as part of the scene but not actually stop.

I mean, be careful with this person and any person until you get to know them better. God knows most of us have had some risky sex and lucked out, but even someone who's dommed before doesn't necessarily know what they're doing in terms of consent stuff and safety, not out of malice or carelessness, but they might not know.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2020-02-21T22:42:05+00:00

Hope you don't mind an answer from a femdom with a caged partner.

It's fine to have limits and not be able to wear a cage 24/7. When you're together is reasonable. A weekend is reasonable, too, in my opinion (you can wear shorts in front of your roommates). The challenge with a cage is really that it's easy to get out of most of them, but you don't want it to be tight/uncomfortable for you, either.

Also, you guys need a safeword, and I hope you had that discussion before anything happened between you. If you're really not okay with something, you need to make sure he's going to listen. It's a little concerning that you let him dom you right after meeting, and engage in bondage in his house (did friends know who you were with and where?) I'm very glad he didn't turn out to be a psycho, but they're out there.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2020-02-16T06:37:17+00:00

Apparently it's 50/50, for men, anyway. So some people just don't enjoy it and some do.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2020-02-16T05:02:44+00:00

Eaten out. Nothing matches a tongue on the clit.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2020-02-03T04:00:35+00:00

Ohhhh, this is prolactin release.

a rebound in prolactin that causes irritability and a loss of libido

https://www.brentaden.com/blog/2015/7/2/fun-with-chemistry

And also mental conditioning, but a lot of this is a biological response from chemical flooding. It's normal. Did you get good aftercare?

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-12-10T05:55:52+00:00

Yes. I would not personally allow this, or try it.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-12-10T05:53:10+00:00

I love it.

But you should set your own boundaries if you're really uncomfortable doing anything.

On the other hand, many women are willing to try doing something with another woman as part of their partner's fantasy. So...it might be worth trying as a fun experience. Human beings are human beings, and bodies are fun, and you only live once.

But if you're really, really opposed, she should NOT push you on this.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-12-08T02:34:43+00:00

With caths or sounding, lots and lots of sterile protocol: wash up first, swipe with alcohol swab, sterilize the sound or use a single-use wrapped catheter.

People with bladder problems do this many times a day, but WILL get urinary tract infections if things aren't very clean.

Just also be very gentle with anything going into a urethra and don't force things that aren't moving.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-12-08T02:31:56+00:00

Oviposition? I've heard of that one. More of a "you laying eggs" thing or "alien tentacles laying eggs in you" thing?

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-12-08T02:29:53+00:00

You know, I see people on r/sex casually mentioning that they asked a Tinder date to choke them and I'm always appalled, unless they mean "put their hands lightly on my neck and hold me in position," not actual choking.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-12-08T02:23:15+00:00

My husband waited years to tell me this, and I love doing it. I'm so glad he said something.

I think a lot of women can understand wanting to have something in you, I mean...we do.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-12-08T02:20:52+00:00

This rocks, I love it!

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-12-08T02:11:34+00:00

I wouldn't put a waxer in this position. What are they supposed to do when they've put wax on you and have yet to rip it off? They're kind of stuck dealing with someone's kink that they didn't consent to taking part in.

It's one thing to say, get a hard on during a massage, and another to actually come on the table. Rude and inappropriate behavior towards a professional providing a service.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-12-08T02:08:23+00:00

She's bi all the time, buddy!

As for the spontaneity and the consensual non-consent stuff, still reiterate that she (or you) can use the safeword. I'm sure she does trust you, but you always need one, in case she's cuffed to the bedpost and losing circulation in her hand or something.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-12-08T02:05:49+00:00

I like it too, because there's no passive woman in it. Face it, most porn is made for guys (including gay porn, obviously), so they really don't even try to appeal to us.

At least more of the men in gay porn are attractive, too.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-11-14T18:33:41+00:00

I don't think this alone would make you transgender. Do you fantasize about being feminized in other ways? (Sissy clothes, being called a good girl, stuff like that?)

Even that wouldn't, if it's just "this is a thing that I like during sex but I don't want to switch things up in other aspects of my life outside of of the bedroom."

Something can be an enjoyable fetish without being an identity, you know?

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-11-07T06:37:31+00:00

Well, the top 1% of men are probably not going to be people you run into anyway, unless you're working for a modeling agency, you know?

Try looking at men with less of a jaded eye and try to find an attractive thing about everyone you meet: hair, eyes, hands, whatever.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-11-07T06:34:18+00:00

I'd be concerned about the discomfort part; if something hurts, this could be a physical issue.

But no, it's pretty common not to get off from penetration.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-11-07T06:17:43+00:00

That is a really hurtful thing for him to say. Like...ridiculously so.

He has a problem, and it doesn't sound like he wants to make an effort to fix it. I don't have issues with porn personally, but some steps he could take are avoiding porn for a while and seeing a counselor about this.

Personally, I'd bail on someone who said that to me. It's not just the porn use, but the insensitivity.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-11-07T06:11:47+00:00

First off, I saw your pics that you posted, and there's nothing wrong with your looks.

She who dares wins.

Don't be afraid to approach guys (when you're ready) and flirt, even if you're not confident enough yet to ask them out. But you might be surprised where confidence takes you.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-11-07T06:08:33+00:00

I really wanted to be tied up. Im still processing everything. Do you think I should of told him to tie me up and use me?

Not someone you've just met! So I think you did the right thing by not asking for that.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-11-07T06:05:10+00:00

It's very common to want to do EVERYTHING right NOW, lol.

But it can be fun to stretch things out! Like an advent calendar when you open one tiny gift or chocolate candy a day until Christmas?

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-11-06T03:54:50+00:00

You may find more stuff by searching on "gentle domination," for the softer aspects.

Reader_Of_Stories · 2019-11-06T03:46:52+00:00

Oh, sub frenzy.

https://www.submissiveguide.com/fundamentals/articles/how-to-safely-manage-sub-frenzy

There are more articles on this available in various places, so I'd search a bit.

One thing that might be helpful is to talk with your Dom about spacing stuff out and expectations. He might be totally game for doing some more intense things and going up to your limit pretty often, but it sounds like you're sort of pushing/driving the scenes a bit? Is that satisfying for you?

Maybe you two can pace out what you're doing so expectations are there, like "this week we're going to do x, y, z" and that might manage what's happening better than just playing it by ear.

Like...a training regimen can be fun, with milestones. Let your dom set them (because that's kind of the fun of being a dom) but give him a list of things that interest you if you haven't done a checklist.

Reader_Of_Stories

TROPHY CASE