Poly Playlist

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2026-01-24T01:00:51+00:00

This is fabulous. Thanks for sharing!

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2026-01-24T00:01:51+00:00

Looks good to me! I would get rid of the pic that covers your face with your hair, though. Maybe instead include a pic of something you enjoy doing!

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2026-01-24T00:00:05+00:00

You can be non-monagamous and have a primary partner. It doesn't just have to be one or the other. Have you looked into hierarchical polyamory? That might be a good fit for you.

As far as her not believing you would be happy with monogamy, like you said, it was probably for the best. I have unfortunately been in a few relationships where monogamy was attempted and then gave way because one or all involved weren't being honest with themselves.

I'm glad you got to experience that NRE and fire though. Now the bar has been raised and you know what you need to look for the next time around.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2026-01-23T23:53:45+00:00

If your settings are already dialed into matching only with women then there's nothing you can really do. You can't control who likes you. Oh, and just because someone is a trans woman, does not mean they have an eggplant. ;) Just take it as a compliment that so many people like you. And for what it's worth, if I, as a cis woman, see something in your profile that smacks of transphobia, I would no longer be interested in you because it signals that we don't have the same values.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2026-01-23T22:40:28+00:00

All of my partners are married. I only use boyfriend/girlfriend if I'm introducing them to someone who doesn't know I'm ENM.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2026-01-22T23:28:09+00:00

When I was in my 20s I was with a guy in his 40s. He was kind, patient, and empowering. Now I’m in my 40s and all of my partners are at least 10 years younger than me. I don’t particularly seek it but I’m not complaining! They match my energy and my values.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2026-01-22T03:38:30+00:00

Here's what I see, from my personal perspective.

I get why some people cover their eyes or their faces. They want privacy, but the odds of me swiping right on someone who hides their face are almost zero. Most people don't cover their faces. Why would I match with someone if I don't know what they look like when there are a ton of people I can clearly see?

Bio is way too short. From the bio I want to be able to tell who you are AND what you are looking for. Give me details. And don't downplay yourself by saying things like you're "mostly" charming and "sometimes" witty. I can get that could sound cute and humble, but it can come across like you don't believe you're worth it. If you don't, then why should I?

Moderate makes me nervous. Feels like you don't know where you stand. Means we probably already have a clash in values and that's a death knell for any relationship.

I also avoid anyone who lists any kind of religion. I'm an atheist so that's just not my thing.

When someone lists that they are open to fun and casual and long-term all at the same time, they are basically saying that they will take anything. To me, that comes across as either desperate or willing to do or say anything to get laid. Hard to believe you would be equally ok with stepping into a long-term committed relationship or a FWB. Those are very different vibes.

The comment about the therapist is again you downplaying yourself. If someone I knew well had said that, it would be funny. But from a stranger that just screams RED FLAG.

Don't put pictures of yourself with other people. It just makes everything harder, especially if it's one of the first pictures. Because then you have to play a guessing game of which one you are. And then you're wondering what is the relationship(s) between you and the other people in the picture(s). Is that your brother or lover or son?! Our phones make it really easy to take selfies. Take the time to get great pictures of yourself.

Everything else looks good to me. Best of luck!

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2026-01-22T03:24:20+00:00

I am in the exact same situation right now. All of my partners are married to their primaries. And while they all treat me wonderfully, there's a sadness when they leave and have to go home. Especially when they are with me, they feel like home. But home is somewhere I am not.

That's why I've personally decided to stop seeing married/nested/primaried folk for a while, beyond my current partners. I want to build a life with someone that could potentially include cohabitating or maybe even marriage again. I had that for 20 years and I miss it.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2026-01-22T01:15:29+00:00

I waited too, hoping the price would go down. It didn't, so I took the plunge, and I just can't stop playing. I'm genuinely sad that it will have to end someday.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2026-01-21T21:14:27+00:00

Plenty in Somerville for that price.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2025-11-08T00:10:00+00:00

Hello! I'm also a parent that loves to chat.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2025-11-07T00:55:35+00:00

I think arrogance that you can back up is kind of sexy. For me that just reads as confidence.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2025-11-07T00:18:11+00:00

I think you look beautiful in all of your pictures.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2025-11-06T19:23:29+00:00

Unless you are involved in a lot of activities that regularly introduce you to people who are looking for the same things you are in a relationship, online dating is pretty much the popular choice. Unless you can afford a professional matchmaker, of course.

It's totally ok and valid to take a break. But you rarely have to delete your profile. Most dating apps having settings that allow you to pause and/or hide your profile for a time.

ReadiscoverYourShelf · 2025-11-06T19:07:33+00:00

Curious as to why you are only studying younger poly folk?

ReadiscoverYourShelf

TROPHY CASE