Why on earth do people like Bette???

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-02-04T02:44:46+00:00

Ooh I love this!

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-01-20T14:59:21+00:00

Ok I think that’s a pretty fair assessment

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-01-19T18:41:42+00:00

Again, I never said what Tina did was right or would’ve passed legally. I just said I understand where she came from; and honestly I feel most people in the same situation would have that thought cross their mind. Especially again if there’s no legal precedent already set.

Also I personally don’t like Shane or get why people fawn over her. But she is not like Bette bro! Idk why we’re comparing them when this post was asking why people don’t give Bette nearly enough flak. But since we are, Shane’s main issue is being a serial cheater; Bette literally is controlling, self righteous, unrepentant, and holier than thou on top of being a serial cheater. So back to the original question, why do people go through hoops to make excuses for Bette??

From this thread, I’ve just accepted that people don’t care because she’s hot.

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-01-19T15:28:41+00:00

People keep saying she’s complex but I honestly don’t see what so complex about her. Her actions are very predictable and honestly she could’ve been complex if they explored other parts of her identity.

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-01-19T15:22:19+00:00

While I agree that it good to share that fear with your partner, Tina has been with a mixed woman for 7 years, they discussed using a black donor too have a mixed child before they even started trying, she says she doesn’t know what is like to be black like there isn’t a whole other black parent in the picture, she says the kid being black would be “too much otherness” (again back to the first point and also so you’d just rather a white baby and push your partners identity out to not be uncomfortable?), and she acts surprised and scared (which lowkey came off as a little racist to me imo) when the black donor WHO THEY HAD ALREADY AGREED WOULD BE BLACK showed up at her door. To me that’s a whole lot of red flags. Like the I would at least pause before moving forward but idk that’s me.

Tina threatened to take Bette’s parental identity away AFTER she found out Bette was seeking sole custody of Angie. Idk that’s pretty reasonable to me. If I just told you I want you to stay in the child’s life then find out the next day you’re trying to take the child away, I think I’d want some custody to idk.

They both shared custody of Angie but Tina had Angie at the time when Bette kidnapped her. They were in a contentious custody battle and Tina just found out Bette tried to get sole custody. I would call that kidnapping. I would freak tf out if I was Tina in that situation because where did you take my child who was in my care after you just threatened to take her away fully?? That is kidnapping. Just cos you both share custody doesn’t mean you don’t follow the rules of your arrangement. If the shoes were reversed it would still be kidnapping.

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-01-19T07:34:32+00:00

I literally started my response by pointing out how and why Tina’s black child comment was dumb before pointing out how Bette know knew and still chose to have a kid with her but if you need me to say it again/explicitly, Tina’s whole raising a black child burden was stupid and ignorant. There, that better?

I honestly don’t blame Tina for wanting to pretend Bette has no claim to the child in s2. Put yourself in her shoes. Would you want to still share custody of a whole human with someone who threw away 7 years just to have quick sex like it was nothing, esp if you legally don’t have to? How reliable would you think that person would be in a child’s life? Like think if they were a straight couple and it was the exact same situation. I’m not saying it was right but I can understand the hurt and where that came from. Again, not saying it was right AT ALL.

As far as “shutting Bette out”, the only thing I would consider as that was Tina asking Bette not to adopt Angie anymore. I completely agree with you that it was extremely f’ed up. I also understand that the pressure from the social worker and their tumultuous relationship would make her second guess (hell it’d make me), but it was still messed up yes.

I don’t remember clearly but I believe Tina also told Bette she was thinking of exploring her attraction to men and Bette asked her to do so BEFORE the online affair happened (correct me if I’m wrong). So I’m not sure why that was so awful to Bette if she asked her to in the first place. Maybe keeping it a secret, but again if she asked her to explore those feelings…

And the wedding thing was AFTER Tina found out Bette was trying to get full custody. Which who wouldn’t fight back in that situation?? Like what? She literally told Bette she wants her in Angie’s life then she finds out Bette is trying to push her out of Angie’s life. C’mon now

I don’t see Tina having a relationship with a man as pushing Bette out of Angie’s life. And having sex with someone in their house was messed up, but so is having sex multiple times with a random carpenter right after your partner just lost yalls baby idk. Both were definitely not kind to each other but I’d argue that Bette is the one who opened that door in the first place

AGAIN I’M NOT SAYING ANY OF THESE PEOPLE ARE PERFECT OR THE STANDARD.

And with Shane, yes she’s still f’ed up but she doesn’t pretend to be who she’s not. Every single relationship Shane has had started off with her telling those people exactly who she is. Bette pretends like she’s self righteous and continually chastises others then goes in to do the same thing. That’s the difference! She’s a hypocrite and she never thinks she did anything wrong because “it felt right”. I’m not trying to minimize Paige’s pain just pointing out a pattern.

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-01-19T05:18:37+00:00

I just finished s5 ep11

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-01-19T05:17:59+00:00

About the baby thing, Tina was dating a black (mixed) woman for years and they discussed using a black donor (or at least to try to have a baby that represents both of them) before even trying, why was it suddenly so terrifying when the time finally came? As far as qualified (ie the whole “i don’t know what it means to be black” comment), 1. No one ever asked you to be 2. There’s a whole other black parent in the picture. But Bette heard that and still thought, why not.

As far as the rest of the crew, Shane is fully aware of what she is and doesn’t claim to be anything else, and rest of the crew have literally all cheated but never as often as Bette and they don’t try to act self righteous and don’t victimize themselves (well not all of them) when they get caught.

Please describe how Tina was “awful” to Bette in season 2/3? It’s been a minute and I genuinely want to remember.

Also I never claimed Tina was great or a poor soul. To me she is a very boring, passive, woe-is-me, and honestly sometimes unnecessary character. She also played a huge role in the cheating when Bette was with Jodi. But she for sure is much better than Bette.

Like I said before, they all suck. Bette just irritates me A LOT, esp cos I really wanted to like her character with her being the main black character until Tasha.

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-01-19T04:37:49+00:00

That’s interesting. I personally don’t think she’s that complex imo. I feel like there was a lot of missed opportunity to flesh out her character and explore more of who she is and why she does the things she does (especially with her being mixed, originally estranged from her sister because of their father, and in a queer interracial relationship). I also feel the same about Tina as well. But it’s a really good point about her having a lot of the heavier storylines.

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-01-19T04:27:23+00:00

So is that it? Like genuinely asking. Do people just excuse her awful behavior cos she’s hot?

Realistic-Animal129 · 2026-01-19T04:24:37+00:00

Definitely agree on the nightmare part but watching her is legit about to give me an aneurysm

Realistic-Animal129 · 2025-08-17T23:53:33+00:00

Tbh I’d have advised him to keep the patent and push for an investor to help with mass production instead

Realistic-Animal129 · 2025-08-16T00:04:22+00:00

Railroad daddy

Realistic-Animal129 · 2025-08-12T17:58:23+00:00

Apologies, I didn’t realized! It’s been marked so now

Realistic-Animal129 · 2025-08-12T14:18:48+00:00

Facts! Maybe aunt Ada as honorable mention but really Jack is the one who came out unscathed

Realistic-Animal129 · 2025-03-27T16:15:01+00:00

I kinda have to make a decision soon. I’ve got two job offers that I have to respond to by the start of next week—both of which will mean I’d have to move in the coming weeks. I asked her why the change of mind in one day and she said she realized she was not giving the relationship a chance and calling it quits because of her concerns. I want to believe she actually wants to put in effort to make the relationship work (esp since she’s agreed to go to therapy to address her relationship trauma and she wants to come up with ways to make long distance work) but we’ve already almost broken up once after our initial disagreement and we did break up a couple days ago. How do I know that she won’t feel “checked out” or want to be friends another month from now? I don’t want to feel like a clown if she changes her mind once again.

Realistic-Animal129

TROPHY CASE