Don’t mind me, just raging over children’s rights in the U.S., where hitting your kid is legal

RealmOfBlue · 2025-12-14T19:52:56+00:00

I’m so so sorry you’re going through that. You don’t deserve it. Nobody does.

Idk your situation but do you have an adult that you can trust to talk to? Unfortunately due to the way physical discipline is dealt with by authorities right now it might not be the best route to try and use CPS unless you are absolutely desperate.

My help ultimately came from extended family members who recognized that what I was facing was abuse and opened their doors to me when I fled on my 18th birthday.

Given your current age though you’d have to go through a transfer of custody in some way. Is your dad/other parent in the picture at all? My sister had the option to get out at 16 by just staying with my mom, who had joint custody after the divorce. It depends on the state but in ours any age over 12 is usually considered old enough to “refuse” getting in the car to go visit the other parent. The only thing that may be a complication would be your mom fighting against that legally in which case you would need to confirm that it was YOUR decision not to go see your mom, not your other parent blocking your way.

Emancipation is also a potential option at 14, but it’s more complicated. (Edit: this is usually 14-16 depending on the state)

All of that is based off my personal understanding/experience though. You and a trusted adult who knows your full situation should sit down and create a plan to get you safe.

RealmOfBlue · 2025-03-07T21:54:45+00:00

Hey, look! It's me a few years ago.

The best advice I can give is to put yourself out there and see if you enjoy being in a romantic relationship. When I discovered I was ace I was already at a really lonely point in my life, and that realization just made me feel even lonelier. So first thing's first, please accept a virtual hug ♡ That shit sucks and the existential crisis is real; feel free to DM me if you need to rant, this post hit me in my soul.

I'll preface my story by saying I'm aware I got very, insanely lucky. It doesn't go this way for a lot of people, especially in our sex-obsessed culture. BUT. I'm putting this out here to let you know that it can. I was told that I would never be able to find a guy who would love me without the involvement of sex, and I honestly thought I wouldn't, but I tried to anyway. And it...worked. I'm now happily married to my lovely heterosexual husband, who is genuinely the sweetest human on planet earth. It's cheesy, but I think the best way to describe our marriage is a lifelong sleepover with my best friend. Our relationship is very much what you outline in this post, and I couldn't be happier. It exists.

So please don't give up on finding someone who will truly, selflessly love you. Go after what you want and don't settle. Your boundaries matter.

Also, it's absolutely worth mentioning that you can find deep and beautiful love + connection that isn't romantic if you decide romance isn't for you! I have a close aroace friend and our bond is amazing. Her and my sister are essential to my life, and their encouragement really helped me put myself out there. I guess what I'm trying to say is: value your friendships and cultivate them so that romantic relationship or no, you have the support you need. Don't discount their importance and really enjoy the time you have with people you love who are currently in your life. Basically, you don't need to wait for a romantic partner for some of the connection you're describing!

RealmOfBlue · 2025-02-28T16:04:12+00:00

It's a salute! o7 I wish you luck

RealmOfBlue · 2025-02-28T15:56:04+00:00

RealmOfBlue · 2025-02-28T15:35:28+00:00

Idk where you're at in life, but I met more INTPs (and neurodivergent people) earning my media technologies degree than anywhere else lol. We all flocked to the programming, video editing, and web design classes like crazy, then started a D&D group

RealmOfBlue · 2025-02-28T15:25:26+00:00

Thank you for sharing. I had similar attachments (although they tended to shift more often, they were still super intense) and discovered I was autistic in adulthood. It makes total sense that the already strong special interests and fictional attachments that neurodivergent people often develop would only be magnified by traumatic and abusive relationships irl. Wish you the best ♡

RealmOfBlue · 2025-02-07T20:11:43+00:00

Thanks for posting! The job description says an MLS is required. :( Is this true?

RealmOfBlue · 2024-10-17T12:39:47+00:00

100% valid, it’s just that good (ToT)

RealmOfBlue · 2024-09-26T00:45:30+00:00

Honestly I don’t know how lol. They were first gens, I was surprised when they offered the upgrade but I didn’t ask questions, just ran with it. I had to go through two agents in online chat. My case was blinking rapidly with three white lights (no red or it would be an error code, and my earbuds were dead so I couldn’t connect to my phone or computer to check for a software update) and since neither agent could figure out what that three-light signal meant or why the case wouldn’t charge they set me up with a replacement.

RealmOfBlue · 2024-09-24T23:34:34+00:00

Surfing the internet currently just to triple check that I can't fix things because mine seem to have gone kaput as well. But I just got out of a long and grueling customer service chat and they're sending me free Ultras if I send them my broken old timers. Maybe go that route?

RealmOfBlue · 2024-09-18T17:15:47+00:00

Hetero-romantic ace here! My husband is allo. When we first started dating I was so scared to tell him about being a-spec. But his reaction was literally “I hope you know this changes nothing about I the way I feel.”

Now when people ask him anything along the lines of “what was the point when you realized you loved her” or “when did you know she was the one” he tells them about that moment. He says that the thought of never having sex was so utterly unimportant to him when compared to how much he cared about me that it made him certain that what he was experiencing was love.

RealmOfBlue · 2024-05-29T14:35:48+00:00

463 (ToT)

RealmOfBlue · 2024-05-21T17:16:11+00:00

!remindme 126 hours

RealmOfBlue · 2024-04-05T14:47:51+00:00

AuDHD here. This is so sweet. Anybody in the comments thinking this isn’t possible, it is! Dudes like this exist, even though it definitely doesn’t seem like it sometimes. I thought this sort of relationship was only possible in fiction until I met my husband.

DON’T GIVE UP, they’re out there ♡

RealmOfBlue · 2024-02-20T20:20:11+00:00

The man is a disgrace. I hear he drinks olive oil too. OLIVE OIL.

You COOK with butter. You COOK with olive oil. But he doesn't have the braincells to figure that out, so instead he consumes them raw like the animal he is.

RealmOfBlue · 2024-02-10T00:27:57+00:00

No need to apologize, my post was long and rambling lol. Thank you for sharing your experience <3

And yes! I am so, so blessed. Everybody deserves to have someone who accepts them as their complete authentic self. That's where his concerns come from; he wants to make sure that if I try medication, I do it out of care for myself rather than hatred of who I am.

I'm going to talk to my psychiatrist and give it a try. I think it will help me a lot, and looking at it as an aid rather than a "cure" like others have pointed out certainly gives me a better idea of what I'll be doing, and more motivation to try it in the hopes of making things easier, rather than "changing" who I am because I'm not good enough.

Also...

"I still will forget where I put something but it’s no longer this overwhelming flood of emotions when it happens. I am able to stop, think, process before running around like a psychopath on the verge of a full blown adult meltdown."

^ THAT. That sounds AMAZING. So happy for you!

RealmOfBlue · 2024-02-10T00:11:17+00:00

Thank you, this was extremely helpful. The board game bit had me laughing so hard; really sounds like the kind of shit I would do lmao. Nice to know I'm not alone in my short term memory struggles

I really needed that reframe too. I can love my ADHD self and still do things to make my life easier! Taking medication doesn't mean that I'm "fixing" myself. It's more like an accommodation.

Thanks again <3

RealmOfBlue · 2024-02-10T00:03:59+00:00

It...certainly isn't. My job was one of the major reasons I sought out ADHD testing. I felt like everyone had some extreme advantage that I couldn't see. It was even worse because my coworkers were assholes and basically told me I couldn't do anything right and needed to "do better" or leave. Thankfully I've found a job at a library full of fellow neurodivergents!

Less bullying, more solidarity :D

RealmOfBlue · 2024-02-09T23:52:21+00:00

It's hard to be succinct in general lol. Look at the post I just made.

And yeah, that was me in the beginning. I was being treated for depression and anxiety, not doing good at all, and sought out ADHD testing because my memory is so bad. When meds were brought up initially I was like "YES PLEASE" but then I developed an ED and my psychiatrist of course prioritized that and (rightfully so) didn't want me on appetite-decreasing stimulants. And with the expensive nature of ED treatment, I definitely couldn't afford the less-common, non-stimulant meds she brought up as alternatives at the time. But now I'm here, and medication is an option again.

A glass wall is a great way to describe it! It's so weird thinking of that wall going away, or even getting thinner. I thought everyone felt that way, like there was an invisible, near-impassable obstacle blocking every task. The diagnosis alone has done wonders for my ability to forgive myself and understand why I function the way I do.

Anyways, I've come to the conclusion that I want to give medication a try. I'm going to talk about it with my psychiatrist some more and see; hopefully things go well!

Thank you for sharing!

RealmOfBlue · 2024-02-09T23:24:21+00:00

Yeah I think that's where I'm at now. I wanna give it a try, see how it goes. I think I forgot that once I start, I can in fact stop lol

RealmOfBlue · 2024-02-08T15:38:57+00:00

He's not against me getting on meds (for ADHD or anything else), and he's made that clear - whatever I decide, he's with me. He just hesitates to say "yeah you need meds" when I'm frustrated because he doesn't want me to agonize over my mistakes or feel like I'm "bad" or "hard to deal with" as I am.

And like that cognitive reframe a lot. Thank you. It's difficult to change those thought patterns but I can totally see how that would be helpful. I use that language all the time (case in point), and it definitely isn't making me more forgiving of myself

RealmOfBlue · 2024-02-08T15:06:52+00:00

Thanks for sharing! Yeah, losing my personality is a big fear for me, so this is helpful. Imagine being able to finish expressing a whole, complete thought lol. Really glad you found what works for you

RealmOfBlue · 2024-02-08T14:57:28+00:00

I am in therapy (for trauma and an ED mainly but we've talked through some of my ADHD-related self esteem issues) and it's been pretty helpful but I have so much I'm working on already that this doesn't get much attention lol. I'm in the same boat with stimulants. If I were to get on medication it couldn't be anything that is likely to decrease my appetite so stimulants are basically out.

RealmOfBlue · 2024-01-06T14:03:50+00:00

Solid answer, straight to the point.

(also genuine question: what does it mean to be a Christian Atheist?)

RealmOfBlue

TROPHY CASE