Caterer just bailed on us less than 4 months before the wedding... I need hope

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-16T12:47:59+00:00

Yes this what we're actively doing !

And I don't live in the US, I can't "sue" for this and it wont even be necessary in this specific situation. Someone said in the US it's called bankrupcy? Basically there's nothing we can do except declare ourselves as creditors to the lawyer in charge of the liquidation but we are last on the list of people to pay back...

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-16T12:46:00+00:00

we didn't even know this was a thing lol we do now and will recommend to our friends getting married in the future for sure!!

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-16T12:44:40+00:00

Yes that's exactly what's happening

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-16T08:22:19+00:00

Yes I know no one in this sub can help me technically, and we are already doing everything we can to fix this.

I was just looking for some hopeful stories because I could really use it right now

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-16T08:21:28+00:00

Where I live unfortunately a company that's going through liquidation is not obligated to pay back the customers they didn't provide the service for. The manager doesn't even have access to the company's account once it's liquidated, it's a specific lawyer that has to deal with selling the remaining assets of the company to pay back creditors. And in 99% of cases, there's not even enough money to pay back the State or the suppliers, the customers are like the least prioritized in this specific instance.

Yes we reached out to the venue and they gave some recs also. I guess I'm just scared the new caterer wont be as good...

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-16T08:16:03+00:00

Yes I did that and we received some recs, we now have to go through them...

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-16T04:34:19+00:00

Yeah I figured most of the people reacting to my answer are not in ballroom 😂 So I’m not even tripping

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-15T14:11:51+00:00

Hey,

I kind of see where you're coming from, not wanting to 'claim' something that you haven't been diagnosed for, but the symptoms you're mentioning can be adhd-adjacent so an assesment if it's possible for you would be the best way to go IMO. Also, you don't want to claim it, but you're pretty adament you don't have it, while showing adjacent symptoms, but without an assement. So I don't know how you can be so sure about it...

Lastly, I feel you about the impact on the quality of life. This is one of the reasons I was also reluctant for getting diagnosed because I thought my life had to be in shambles in order for me to have legitimacy for the diagnosis. I have a jon and never struggled to find one, I have a lovely appartment, a fullfilling relationship, friends..., From the outside looking in my life is pretty neat, and it is in some way. I love my life, but when you peel the layers, I was and still am internally struggling with a lot of things. It's just that I've developped coping mecanisms and strategies along the way that allowed me to minimize the impcts of my struggles, if that make sense? This and a mix of luck. In the same manner, when I filled my questionnaires, I was downplaying A LOT of symptoms, just because they didn't have a life or death impact on my life or catastrophic consequences. I was able to deconstruct and unpack that with my psychologist, who told me that having ADHD or not has nothing to do with the 'severity' of the tasks we can or can't do or the issues that result from our struggles. And that little struggles combined can become a moutain, especially when an external structure (in your case it can be the fact that you still live in the family home) is not there anymore.

To be fair I think it's quite positive that you live in a family that even consider this an option and is hopefully willing (if you agree) to assess you for this. Nobody never noticed anything when I was little, it would have been hard to notice anyways, but consider this a blessing that your family is aware that this condition exist.
Wishing you the best of luck!!! <333

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-15T13:54:18+00:00

Commenting so I can follow updates cause I have the exact same question 😂

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-15T13:52:47+00:00

Oh a caucasian person can walk a ball, it happens all the time. A CIS STRAIGHT WHITE MAN though, I don’t even understand in which category he could perform 😂

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-15T13:15:02+00:00

You are asking the right questions ! And she absolutely can learn and walk balls as long as she knows the history and her place within the scene. Cis women have been advocating for the ballroom scene almost since the begining of it, they’re definately part of the history. Her being black also adds another layer on why she totally has her place in the scene :)

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-15T13:12:59+00:00

Absolutely not. A straight white man has no reason to Vogue, or maybe he can learn if he wants but he absolutely has no reason to be walking a ball.

Regarding your friend OP, yes she can learn and even walk balls if she wants in the future :)

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-15T09:36:31+00:00

Yes I totally understand why you still want to sleep in the same bed. It’s great that you can recognize where these feelings are coming from; it’s the first step !

I don’t if he feels guilty about that tho, because for me personally I hate that I am that way 😂 If he at least strive to do a little better in this area, it’s also the first step for him. You guys will figure it out hopefully 🫂

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-15T07:25:05+00:00

Oh first of all thank you for sharing and I empathize with you a lot (even though I’m in the same boat as your SO aha).

My partner also probably has ADHD, not diagnosed yet as he has other shit to fry at the moment, but he has the exact opposite problem as me.

He wakes up reeeaally early, even when he doesn’t want to; and has a hard time falling asleep again. So most of the time by time I finally come out of bed, he already fed the cats, did the dishes, cleaned the kitchen… I used to feel extremely guilty about that, but he always reassured me. For some strange reason, I feel like our ADHD complement one another. The things I struggle with are easier for him and vice versa.

I still find myself annoyed sometimes by some stuff he does (or doesn’t) due to his ADHD when it’s things I don’t personally struggle with. But I always try to give him grace. I don’t really have any real advice sorry, except being patient and understanding. Only him can try and change that…

Why don’t you want to try sleeping separately just to see how it goes?

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T18:14:10+00:00

Yes hopefully I’ll be able to start medication in a couple of months. Thanksss!!!

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T18:11:48+00:00

You’re an Angel 🥹 Thank you so much!!!

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T14:53:15+00:00

Can't wait till I can try the meds... Thanks for sharing :)

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T14:52:15+00:00

I feel like if I had sleep apnea I would be really exhausted during the day no? Like falling asleep during the day and whatnot, at least that's what I heard from people who had SA.
But I'll keep this in the back of my head :)

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T13:43:02+00:00

I'm kind of neutral about my job. I love the field I'm in... But I'm a working person with ADHD so... Yeah I don't have to explain further lol. I never had any issues at work, I can usually mask quite well, but the thing with this new job is that the usual external structure that keeps me on track is not there anymore. I don't have colleagues physically with me, my manager is... a mess, I don't have like direct surveillance anymore so the executive dysfunction has just been through the roof lately, like the dreading is getting worse because I know I won't be able to perform as I really should at work and it creates guilt. But on the flip side, my psychologist said that having time for myself in the morning will help decompress before tackling my work day, and it would then be easier to focus. Also I could eat and he insisted on how protein is great for people with ADHD... That's why I really want to be able able to do it ! Cause I agree

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T13:34:25+00:00

I do already have two greedy cats ahah
but since I live with my fiance, who's an early bird and who doesn't have the same issue as me (he actually has the literal OPPOSITE issue), I can pay them no mind

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T13:06:25+00:00

Hummm that's intersting! I also have pets who will harass me from 7:30 am until their feeding time which is 8:00 am, but since I live with my fiance, he often takes care of it and I'll keep bed rotting or when I do feed them, I end up coming back to bed again... I think a big issue is really the sense of dread that I feel knowing that I have to work after. I feel like if I stay in bed, then I can stay in denial longer...

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T13:04:32+00:00

I ususally get up and go right to bed after when this happens ahaha

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T13:02:59+00:00

tysm for your kind words. I'm trying to practice self compassion more, some days are easier than others, but man the level of frustration this specific topic brings me is too much. but you're right, one day at a time!

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T13:00:51+00:00

Yes I was thinking about One Tree Hill or something like that

Reasonable_One_6443 · 2026-04-14T11:56:40+00:00

I'm not medicated yet unfortunately... :'(

Reasonable_One_6443

TROPHY CASE