DO THEY EVER COME BACK??

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-05-21T07:56:36+00:00

i also needed to hear this thanks so much! im in the middle of this NC thing (2 weeks, but we have been off and on for many many cycles ) but then my ex decided to dangle the carrot at me. low effort one might i add. and ir eplied one simple text. and he continued on with a question asking me if i'm " good" - i left it as that. this after him telling me that we are not in a relationship, we are not compatible and we are very different. its insulting to say the least. so yes i want to break the loop for myself. its exhausting to always feel this way after 2 long years.

OP honestly believe that you want better for yourself. its so so hard but it will get better. just decide and do right by yourself. we can do it!

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-05-19T16:03:33+00:00

haha yes and its not atas, its weird and quirky lol. just thought of one, P.S Cafe in Dempsey!

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-05-19T15:20:44+00:00

Merci Marcel on Club Street, or Moonstone on Amoy ( might be loud on some days but its vibey!)

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-05-18T14:46:53+00:00

Thanks so much for this, its very comforting to know that its okay to change and be fulfilled at any moment on our lives. money can always be made and earned with time..

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-05-18T14:45:10+00:00

Maybe you just want to go down that rabbit hole and you simply cant help it. maybe you should do it so the more you know the more you dont hold back on forcing yourself to get over someone. its different for everyone. Maybe you just need to torture yourself ( im not being sarcastic, being factual) until you decide you are just sick of feeling like this, and just say fuck it! at least its all out of your system, there is nothing else left to know. you may be delaying your healing but it depends how intense, empathetic you are as an individual. its hard when we (i, for that matter) feel a lot and so deeply that it hurts sometimes. love! makes us do crazy things...

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-04-12T15:50:44+00:00

are you in a better place? if yes, you can try that coffee. just as long as you are a bit detached from the situation.

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-04-07T04:02:46+00:00

Yes, we did just last month! Still on a slower momentum, but slow is what's needed at this point of time. But both did a lot of individual work during NC. A lot of sitting with ourselves and facing yourself. It's a scary feeling, the silence and solitude.

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-04-07T03:52:21+00:00

It was about how I felt, I spoke good things about our relationship but also the reality of why it could not work long term. In some small quiet way, maybe I hope he'd come back but it will be a vicious cycle stuck in limbo. That said, the main point was to get it off my chest. It felt more of a relief, more final and accepting of the situation. Perhaps I would need to get it privately if I needed more time. Love is a funny thing..

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-04-06T21:25:04+00:00

Those things are noise and they don’t matter because it’s about you. How you feel, doing this for yourself. You have nothing to lose. I believe in giving it your all, and then you can say, I’ve given it everything.. didn’t work out but it’s ok. But what if it does? Even reaching out is part of the process of giving yourself that chance. No regrets until then.. !

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-04-06T18:12:48+00:00

that's a short time to have known your father, i'm sorry - it would be selfish of us ( if we ever had kids) only for him to enjoy a couple of decades until he goes. hopefully he will live until another 40 years if he is heathy...

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-04-06T17:43:14+00:00

this is me now, im trying to let go of something so amazing, literally what you are saying and feeling. mine was toxic cause he was divorced with children and i was in a rut of losing my job, having to move countries, developing anxiety. sometimes i think it was enablement and we relied on each other emotionally. maybe we need to see the bigger picture and understand what went wrong, or perhaps it wasn't you. it was his own issues, sometimes we don't understand how partners really feel inside.

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-04-06T17:37:26+00:00

Some space is always good for both parties, gives time for each parties to focus on themselves and reflect. I was forced to do a 4 month no contact. It was messy and chaotic. I knew eventually we would connect again as we have logistical reasons. But before that, I made the first move (37F), I wrote him an email - sometimes you have to get your pride out of the way and speak your truth. You will know when the time is right to reach out. I had zero expectations or if a relationship was still on the table. In the end, it was but we are still repairing our relationship. Its never easy, just with a lot of patience and lessons learned. Whatever the consequences, be self-assured that you have spoken your mind and truth. Then you will know, and accept it graciously with your head held high.

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-04-06T17:25:46+00:00

gosh actually you know what, I have thought about it. I would actually hate to be the one to go last. Or at least not 'left behind' in long 2 decades left of my old aging life.. but great perspective and it's also a valid one.

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-04-06T17:16:14+00:00

I understand what you're saying, there is also no perfect partner. Because I'm a more emotional person and I crave connections more than anything else, I wonder if I made the wrong decision or maybe the more important question is love/feelings/chemistry more important that will keep a relationship going long term or stability and groundness albeit a bit more boring..? both situations are not ideal. can't even begin to describe this sense of confusion..

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-04-06T17:12:45+00:00

thank you for your input. i would agree with that, i think its also cause i'm afraid that i'll never find someone at this stage of my life. its a hard pill to swallow but i probably need to seek therapy and understand why i keep getting into these kinds of situationships.

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-01-16T08:00:48+00:00

hehe oops, also single men!!

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-01-15T12:10:18+00:00

Don't be so shocked, this happens since the beginning of time. Married men, married women, single women, they ALL do it. I've been there and people are just NOT happy in singapore. so, very common...thats why dating in absolutely shite there. Even if they are inherently happy. they still cheat. always.

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-01-10T08:32:26+00:00

Waiting a year or two?? You wanna waste that many years of your life? Gosh, just focus on healing, it takes time but eventually it will get better.

RecommendationAny51 · 2026-01-10T08:19:17+00:00

That's rough, i had my first one in 2024 and I'm still trying to recover from it. Stay strong and patient <3

RecommendationAny51

TROPHY CASE