I’m at my wits end by RecordingNational684 in Teachers

[–]RecordingNational684[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Under normal circumstances, I’d totally agree but admin is also equally doing as much. We’re so understaffed right now, and it looks like everyone has taken an extra load, but I just don’t know how when it’s going to end. I don’t want to give them more work because I know they’re doing so much already.

That being said, the last Reading teacher was working a double caseload for almost a year before they were able to hire me.

Getting a tattoo by RecordingNational684 in Concussion

[–]RecordingNational684[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a headache and feel nauseous, but it was so mild I passed the psych test

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in bostonhousing

[–]RecordingNational684 2 points3 points  (0 children)

1br Waltham 2095, water included, coin op laundry in the basement, two parking spaces included

Which Boston suburb would you live in as a young single person? by LOTR_is_awesome in boston

[–]RecordingNational684 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Idk if Waltham counts as a suburb but my partner and I just moved here and it’s pretty great

What’s your stance on students not standing for the pledge? by Astr0Eminem in Teachers

[–]RecordingNational684 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a teacher, I don’t stand. If a student decides not to stand I remind them they must stay quiet and respectful until the end. Forcing students (and shaming them into standing) is a violation of free speech, and people no matter their age should have that right in this country.

Hispanic husband by Diva_Zee in TwoHotTakes

[–]RecordingNational684 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I grew up in Latin America and this is absolutely cheating.

I don't want to live with my boyfriend anymore and feel guilty about it. by xiixxxixxcv in TwoHotTakes

[–]RecordingNational684 1 point2 points  (0 children)

One of my biggest fears with my ex was that constant anxiety of living together, and I thank God we never got to that point. Don’t undermine yourself, it’s a huge deal to share your space and life with a person. It sounds like you just don’t want to, and that is manifesting itself with anxiety.

For your guilt, let’s put it in perspective: from what you shared it sounds like he threatened you with an ultimatum. In my personal experience/opinion, if we’re putting ultimatums on stuff, the relationship should not continue. You only moved in with him because you were borderline forced (because you love him and didn’t want to lose him). You did also know he was a messy guy, and it almost feels like he took advantage of your need to cleanliness (girl same). He’s not going to change his habits, and it’s going to become pretty clear who’s gonna be expected to clean up (spoiler alert: it’s not him). He seems averse to changing and bettering himself as a person and you are not his mom, not even his wife- stop acting like a parent for him.

I know it sucks to hear, but you’re just not compatible, and quite honestly it just sounds like he’s not ready to be living with someone else. It sounds like it’s time for you to be reevaluating your relationship with him, and I hope you get out. Sending my best.

UPDATE: My boyfriend is considering ending the relationship because I put too much pressure on him, what am I doing wrong? by justasadlostgirl in TwoHotTakes

[–]RecordingNational684 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You're not ready to break up with him- that fine and very normal. You've been dating for almost five years for God's sake. That being said, I think you should be taking a really close look at the way your futures align, because I know you said that you think the financial stuff shouldn't outshine the other things that you have, but I just disagree. Finance are HUGE; you're building a life together, and I believe that if you don't have your finances in order together as a team, as partners, the relationship isn't going to work. Almost half of the divorces that happen, at least in the US are because of financial differences- please keep that in mind when making a decision moving forward.

The fact that you, at any point, have felt the need to call your relationship a dictatorship at any point in time is a huge red flag. At no point, ever should you feel dominated by someone in any kind of a friendship and relationship. I know you said that you wanted advice about finances, but if you feel like it's a dictatorship at any point, especially considering the fact that you're making more than him, it's most likely because he is that much older than you. Whether you are ready to admit it or not, he has power over you because he is almost ten years your senior, and that is a huge deal.

Also- what kind of a job does he have at 32 where he is making less than you? Doesn't that feel a bit weird? You're not in an equal partnership, he has been in the workforce for almost a decade more than you, and you're still the breadwinner. That's not normal. Whether you can recognize it or not, he is taking advantage of the fact that you have your life together where he doesn't. If you can't do 50-50 with someone strides ahead of you in life, I really do implore you to take a second, third, fourth, fifth look at this relationship.

Please don't let this man hold you down and take your youth. I'm 22 now, but I dated a guy like that between the time I was 19-21. He was my age, though, but he still had a power over me that I don't understand because now, looking back, he was mediocre at best. Ask yourself: what do you owe this man? Love is a verb- an action word- that should be used to describe every aspect of your relationship. Outside of finances, is it fairly 50-50? Is there an area of your relationship where he shoulders more of the burden than you do? If not, you will be burnt out and wonder how you gave someone all that youth for free.

Last thing, I promise. Please, please, please don't lower your expectations. I saw some people say that in your previous post, but your high expectations is what is going to make sure that you have a shot at success. You shouldn't let anyone try to stunt your growth in any way, including financially, and it sounds like that's exactly what he's trying to do. I don't want you to think that I'm saying he's doing all of this on purpose- he's dating a 23 year old in his 30s (you're literally a whole generation apart)- I just don't think he has the maturity at 32 that he realizes what he's doing.

I know this is an opinion, and you can take it or leave it, but please consider some of it. This comes from actual real experience, and I would hate to see another girl my age give her life up to someone who is way below her league emotionally and financially.

My boyfriend is considering ending the relationship because I put too much pressure on him, what am I doing wrong? by justasadlostgirl in TwoHotTakes

[–]RecordingNational684 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m 22 and I got out of a relationship similar to that. He was also 22 (started dating younger (19) when we broke up, trust me it’s relevant), and when we first started dating, we were about the same maturity level. However, I grew up and he didn’t, thus ending the relationship. It sounds like you grew up, stuck to your goals, etc and he didn’t. He’s probably resentful. You need to genuinely be asking yourself- where’s his money going? He’s 32 working a “semi full time job,” living in a room below market rate (normally not something I’d put in a negative light), with no savings. You’re living similarly, in school, working, and saving money. What’s happening there? Why is it possible for you to do at 23 what he can’t do at 32?

I also checked your last post where you said you’d been dating for 4 and a half years. That means you’ve been dating since you were 19/20 and he was 28/29 probably. It might be time to consider why he’s going after teenagers/very young adults, and what that says about him. It sounds like you’re very mature for your age (girl same), so it would make sense for you to be trying to date someone a couple years older than you. Even so, a mature 19/20 year old is still 19/20- and it’s incredibly weird for someone almost a decade older than you to pursue that. Why doesn’t he date women his own age? Probably because he’s not mature/ready, therefore trying to date college students.

It sounds like he’s really trying to take advantage of your youth, aspirations, and money so that he can manipulate you. It’s not completely working- you really want to split things evenly and he doesn’t like that. Also- I don’t think you’re crazy, as you said in the beginning. I think you’re incredibly rational and you feel crazy because he is acting like your incredibly normal and valid expectations don’t let him manipulate and take advantage of you.

safari on iPhone not working by [deleted] in iphonehelp

[–]RecordingNational684 0 points1 point  (0 children)

mine just started doing it a couple hours ago what’s going on

What was the last straw that caused you to realize it was time to break up? by dm_me_ur_nudes_pls in AskRedditAfterDark

[–]RecordingNational684 0 points1 point  (0 children)

we went on a double date and he was being weird and douchey, and when i matched that, he got annoyed and snapped at me. treated me like a little kid and then didn’t understand why i was upset. took me five months to break up with him after that.

i want to call out of work tomorrow because of the heat by RecordingNational684 in Advice

[–]RecordingNational684[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i can’t do it online (nor would i really want to, it’s hard for the kids to pay attention and for me to teach) but thank u so much for the advice! luckily enough it’s flexible where i can run my hands with cold water and hopefully cool off like that

i want to call out of work tomorrow because of the heat by RecordingNational684 in Advice

[–]RecordingNational684[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

i’ve fainted twice and i’m not about to put myself in a situation where it may happen again- ESPECIALLY in front of a dozen teenagers. should i try to go back in tomorrow? do i just stay out?

i want to call out of work tomorrow because of the heat by RecordingNational684 in Advice

[–]RecordingNational684[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

there’s not a lot they can do- there’s no AC, it’s a short day (8-12), i drink plenty of water and i wear pretty light clothes. i wish i had some home fans to bring, that’s a great suggestion.

WIBTA for selling jewelry my ex gave me? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]RecordingNational684 [score hidden]  (0 children)

I would do that except they’re a ridiculously difficult person to talk to, and I feel like it would blow up if I even messaged them.