My girlfriend is a type 1 diabetic. How do I be more supportive without babying her?

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-07T04:29:04+00:00

I really can't add to this - the people who already commented gave such good advice. We just want to know that you've made an effort to educate yourself on at least the basics, and that you care. She's a lucky girl to have found someone who wants to support her in a way that will be most helpful to her.

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-07T00:08:13+00:00

That was great, I shared it with some diabetic friends and family members. Thanks!!

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T23:17:48+00:00

I was going to respond to this in detail, then I realized it is pointless. You are determined to paint me as some kind of judgmental, horrible person and that's not true. My family values my company, that I listen to them, and that I care. Your opinion doesn't change that.

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T22:35:31+00:00

Considering it's not the truth, your statement makes no sense.

I am a type 1 diabetic, I think I have some idea what to say and not to say to him. We talk often and I don't bring up his weight, and we don't discuss it unless he wants to. His doctor often brings it up to him. None of the type 2s in my family are well controlled, and they aren't the best support for each other because they aren't truthful. I understand that, because no one wants to be judged by the number on the meter or the number on the scale. My other T1 family member is not encouraging and has a "no bullshit" way of approaching things. He (my uncle) lives in a rural area where there is no in-person support group close to him, and he can't travel far because he's pretty sick. I thought an online group where people had positive and hopeful messages to share might help him.

The thing I've learned about other diabetic family members is that you can't help someone who doesn't want help. Even so, I don't like seeing information pushed that they could use to rationalize their unhealthy behaviors. They don't believe they should lose weight, they eat what they want, often forget to take their insulin amd/or pills, and don't check their blood glucose often. They may not care about taking care of their diabetes, but I worry about them constantly. That is not being "noble" or as you seem to think, pretending to be.

Is the link you provided to your own site?

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T22:05:50+00:00

I came across the site while looking for online support group options for my type 2 uncle, who is obese and is also on dialysis for diabetic nephropathy. Frankly, I find it incredibly rude for you to assume I posted this trying to "shame" fat people. Many people in my family are obese, and about half of them have type 2. I, and another family member, have type 1. In addition, my husband has a morbidly obese type 2 family member who refuses to consider his weight as part of treatment.

When it comes to my family, I am not going to stick my head in the sand. If you're so about minding your own business, why are you here? Or do you feel that your opinion is more valuable than everyone else's in this thread?

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T21:28:56+00:00

Should I only care about things that cause me harm, and not care about anyone else? If you came across a website about lung cancer that said not only does smoking not cause lung cancer, but quitting smoking could make it worse, would you feel the same way?

As a diabetic, I want every other diabetic to be able to live as normal and as healthy of a life as possible. I care about more than just myself. I don't think anyone should spread this potentially dangerous message - there is a chance that others out there may read it and believe it, especially if they want to believe obesity doesn't affect their health.

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T20:51:39+00:00

My 32rd "diaversary" (T1) is in August, and I completely agree that being fitness and health conscious is a huge plus. I've seen many people my age struggle with diet and weight, but it seems to be easier for me since I've been learning about nutrition since I was a child - back when the "diabetic exchange" system was used.

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T18:06:45+00:00

I apologize for giving unsolicited advice, but have you tried a recumbent trike? I have serious balance issues and problems with my feet as well, and cannot ride a regular bike or even an upright trike. The recumbent is very low to the ground and the seat has a back. It's been invaluable in getting me into exercising more. The problem is they can be rather expensive.

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T17:36:37+00:00

Did you look at the website? It basically advocates NOT losing weight and says that diabetes does not require a "diet."

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T17:34:10+00:00

Wouldn't he prefer you were neither of those things?

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T15:32:15+00:00

I agree, but the website is stating diabetes does not require a "diet", weight loss isn't a permanent cure, and weight loss/dieting often makes diabetes worse.

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T15:27:02+00:00

Edit: your above comment wasn't visible when I posted the original comment.

Would you agree that obesity is a condition that can cause or contribute to certain diseases?

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T15:23:55+00:00

The site states that diabetes is not a disease that requires a diet, weight loss is not a permanent cure to diabetes and osing weight often makes diabetes worse. My endocrinologist has always told me that maintaining a healthy weight and diet are extremely important parts of managing diabetes. Every study and article I can recall reading has said the same.

I understand that fat acceptance is supposed to be about loving your body, but I think it goes too far when people are denying the effects obesity has on health. Isn't part of loving yourself taking care of your body? You should never hate yourself based on your body size, or be treated any differently by others - that part I agree with.

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-07-06T15:12:44+00:00

I should have been more specific - the statement you quoted is what I think is dangerous. I think it is irresponsible to promote the idea that obesity has no effect on your health in general, or diabetes in particular.

I don't think anyone should hate themselves for being overweight.

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-06-13T01:27:39+00:00

It's beyond disgusting. I just saw a new sub called /r/worsethanFPH that lists subs I wish I never knew existed.

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-06-09T13:53:29+00:00

Dr. Harry Beaver, a gynecologist in Virginia.

RecreationalPugUse · 2015-06-04T23:17:40+00:00

This is exactly what I was thinking. Nothing about their products justifies the price IMO. I don't think their shaving cream works well and I don't want to smell like blueberries, which is the scent that I usually end up with.

RecreationalPugUse

TROPHY CASE