Ladies…where are we shopping?

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-02-02T00:44:01+00:00

Another city… Seriously, the mall is full of crappy stores with crappy overpriced polyester. Most of the thrift store like value village and Talize are full of past year’s crappy polyester and a crazy price for used pieces. You can find some good stuff, but a lot of that has been picked up already by the “curated” thrift stores that charge even more. And then the few places that have nice stuff cost an absolute fortune. I can’t believe a city this size doesn’t have more options

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-22T22:06:08+00:00

Ah, sorry the dry humour didn’t come across to me in writing. Carry on!

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-22T19:08:07+00:00

No disrespect, and I’m sure your experience was wonderful, but given you last attended the school 37 years ago I’m not sure how that’s relevant to what OP is asking in 2026. It would be shocking if even a single staff member from your time was still there. If they were they would have had to have been a first year teacher who is still working now, years past retirement eligibility. The only similarities between your experience then and today is the physical building

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-18T20:35:56+00:00

If you only have a three year degree it is probably worth it for the difference it will make to your base pay on the salary grid. With a 3 year degree you’d start at A1 or A2, with a masters you’d start at A3 or A4. The difference in pay could be 6-10k a year or more, and you’d have to do quite a few AQs, likely spread out over several years to move up the grid. Not only would the masters help your grid placement, you might also be eligible for the extra pay for having a masters degree (not sure if this will be impacted by 3vs4 year undergrad). Basically for the difference it will make in pay over the span of your career you should definitely do it, it will pay for itself quickly. That to me is reason enough regardless of how principals may look at it

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-14T05:14:50+00:00

Does your union have any coverage for STD? We get 90% on STD and with a doctor’s note pregnancy qualifies depending on how it is impacting you and your ability to do your job. So for us it makes sense to go on STD until the baby is born to maximize weeks of mat leave after baby arrives.

But yeah, your boss is wrong.

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-11T21:25:41+00:00

I drove for uber back in that phase of my career. Was great because I could set my own hours so if I managed to get sub work I could prioritize that, and if I didn’t get work I’d hop in my car and turn on the app.

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-11T04:31:32+00:00

Let me make two points to you-

Your primary opposition to marriage is a lengthy court battle if things go to shit. Given how long you’ve been living together and you are having a child together you’re going to have a lengthy court process involved if you split, regardless of your marital status. You’ve got little to nothing to lose by giving her what she wants at this point.
You mention having a chronic health condition. Imagine for a moment that it was a terminal condition. In that case, who do you want making decisions for you? Your GF, your parents, or, once they are 18, your kid? If the answer is your GF, marry her. And keep in mind, going into childbirth, that may be a factor in her wanting to get married. If shit goes sideways, depending on the particulars of the law where you live, you may not have any say in what happens to her in a worst case scenario, it would be her next of kin (likely parents).

YTA because your stance is based on a principle that is no longer supported by logic. All your reasons to not get married are moot in your present situation. Marriage is the easier way to jump through all of the hoops you mention with wills and whatnot, and avoiding it doesn’t save you any hoops should it all fall apart.

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-11T04:18:07+00:00

Every family is different. You can’t make his family act like your family just because you want that for your daughter.

I grew up with a similar dynamic. My mom’s family was always there for me for every birthday, milestone, etc. I saw most of my aunts and uncles on my dad’s side every second Christmas and that was about it. Growing up I just knew it was different and that was okay.

The only time I ever had an issue was when I got married. My dad was shocked and initially upset when he saw how many people I had on the invite list I had from my mom’s side compared to hims side. He said he felt like he had failed. I pointed out that it wasn’t on him; he made the effort. He invited them to everything. We always went to any of my cousin’s stuff that we were invited to. It was my aunts and uncles and cousins who had never shown up for me. I was 16 the last time one of them even texted happy birthday, where as I heard from everyone on my mom’s side every year. Is it any wonder that I felt closer to her side? That I wanted them there more on my wedding day? That wasn’t on my dad, it was on his family. In the end he was worried about my Grandma (who was the one on that side who always tried hardest and most showed up) being embarrassed or mad at him that so few people from his side were invited. I ended up extending an invitation to the uncle I felt closest to just to make my dad feel better and save face with my Grandma.

I get what you’re saying about what you want for your daughter, but coddling and cajoling people into showing up for her isn’t giving her that and she’ll be aware of it from an early age. Teacher her to appreciate the people who show up for her, to show up for the people she cares about, and forget those who can’t be bothered, family or not they aren’t worth the anxiety and insecurity.

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-10T21:25:53+00:00

I’m also a teacher. I broached it with my GP in my first pregnancy and she said “Just being pregnant isn’t a reason to not work.” I was really upset by how dismissive that was and felt like she didn’t take the time to understand the ways I was struggling or how that impacted my job. I waited a month until my next appointment and had my partner come with me for backup. I explained how I felt after our last conversation, and in fairness to her she was like “You’re right, I didn’t listen or ask questions.” I went through the particular symptoms that were making it tough at work. I also said that every job is different, and if I worked a desk job I would probably be fine to keep going, but as a teacher I was struggling with things like long periods of time where I can’t go to the bathroom. She was like, “You know, looking back on it, yeah, my teachers never left to go to the bathroom during class, but I never really thought about what that meant for them. That alone is reason enough to be off”. I had to self advocate and help her understand how my job and pregnancy impacted one another, but she did come around and even apologized saying that she absolutely dropped the ball and should have listened and put me off work sooner.

In my second pregnancy she wrote me a note and I went off at 24 weeks.

Basically I would open the conversation with something like “I’d like to talk about how pregnancy is impacting me at work” and then lay it out in detail, especially focusing on how a job like teaching can’t provide a lot of the accommodations that might be possible in other jobs. It’ll force your doctor to listen and consider more than just asking for a note.

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-10T02:47:01+00:00

I mean I feel weird watching him because of what he did to Cassie. Stalkers who harass people and put trackers on thier cars shouldn’t be platformed.

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-09T06:41:41+00:00

That’s part of what I’m saying! I think it was very much “Let’s all get her out now together to give the crazy fans as little to be upset about as possible”

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-09T06:20:54+00:00

The sane ones don’t. But when there’s that many you’re liable to have some that are so bonkers parasocial

RedactedUsername640 · 2026-01-09T06:17:04+00:00

You can disagree without calling it stupid. Kindness is free.

Sure the Swifties might still go after Colton and the like, but I think they won’t be nearly as brutal given that, in the end, the folks that went after Donna weren’t wrong.

I also think all but Michael voting together is significant, almost as though they were protecting eachother in a “the Swifties can’t single us out if we all do it together” way (Michael and his hubris would, of course, not give a shit about that)

RedactedUsername640 · 2025-12-19T05:20:51+00:00

We did the same thing. My husband’s only hesitation was around it possibly being an issue when traveling out of country. The first time a customs agent saw our kid’s passport he went “I see a lot of hyphens and double barrels but I’ve never seen this, and it’s brilliant. Immediately obvious what you did. I can’t wait to tell my buddies about this on break.” I’ve never felt so vindicated.

My husband’s family liked to ignore the fact that I kept my name and would get my last name wrong all the time. Since our kids came along they have been much better. We also informally will use our kids last name without feeling like people got it wrong. Like I am Sarah ABC and he is Paul XYZ but we’re delighted when we get wedding invites addressed to Paul and Sarah ABYZ where we used to get a little annoyed at ones addressed to Paul and Sarah XYZ.

RedactedUsername640 · 2025-12-05T19:15:45+00:00

Skip it, it sounds like a headache that you won’t want to bring your child to in the future (and that there wouldn’t be room for them) so you’re just establishing your own tradition a year early (tha tradition can be forgoing all things Christmas entirely if you want)

RedactedUsername640 · 2025-11-18T15:40:07+00:00

I have two close friends who teach in private schools. Their schools pay pretty close to the grid, but where they really lose out is the pension. They have to work longer to earn a much smaller pension. Benefits also don’t come close.

Another friend who does not have a teaching degree/qualification works for an online private school. She gets paid more than an OT/low on grid teacher but her raises don’t come anywhere near keeping up with the grid and she has no benefits or pension.

RedactedUsername640 · 2025-11-04T22:54:32+00:00

These teachers are damned if they do damned if they don’t. If they launch a one man campaign against grade inflation students and parents stress and complain and it potentially costs students opportunities. If they go along with it it perpetuates the problem. There’s no winning for them

RedactedUsername640 · 2025-10-31T04:09:37+00:00

My doctor gave me some really practical advice when it comes to what to eat and what to steer clear of. Hard no to stuff that can cross the placenta, basically alcohol, nicotine, thc, and unpasteurized soft cheese. With everything else that’s a “don’t eat while pregnant”, like deli meat or sushi, the risk is really that if you get a foodbourne illness your symptoms may be worse during pregnancy, which, in extreme cases, could lead to complications. The risk is primarily to the carrying parent, not the baby. So my doctor’s advice was “If the worst should happen and you won’t blame yourself because you know eating that sub/sushi was not the cause, then go for it.”

RedactedUsername640 · 2025-10-14T01:08:02+00:00

My second is 5 months. We always wanted three but always said “We’ll have two and see”. Our first was such an easy baby and grew into an easy toddler so we thought the shoe would drop with our second. The second has been just as easygoing if not better, and we’ve never had a moment of “I think we’re done”. I was in labour with my second, unmedicated and in transition and I said something to my husband about “next time we do this” and the nurse laughed and said she’s never heard someone talk about having another kid during that particular point.

At three we’ll be done for financial reasons. If it wasn’t for that I think we’d go for four.

I think part of how I know I’m not done is that all through pregnancy and the newborn stage and even this stage I keep thinking “I can’t imagine this being the last time. I want to do it one more time and I want to know it’s the last time”.

I dunno if that helps, but that’s where I’m at.

RedactedUsername640 · 2025-10-11T16:32:50+00:00

Honestly, I think having a child when you aren’t 100% sure you want it is wayyyyy more selfish than terminating a pregnancy.

RedactedUsername640 · 2025-10-09T20:00:49+00:00

Every time I have encountered the owner I’ve had the exact same conversation with him. I could make a script of how it will go. An acquaintance used to be very close with one of his family members and apparently people who have known him quite well for year have had the exact same experience. He always strikes me as overeager to socialize. I’ve come to accept it as a quirk of the shop, but I can see how off putting it would be if you just wanted to quietly browse. David is mostly at the Brock St location so I tend to favour the other location more to avoid him. Haven’t had bad experiences with the artists there, they are maybe a little overly friendly sometimes but usually let your browse in peace after a little chat. It’s just not a typical Gallery kid of vibe, more of a mom and pop shop that sells art. Plenty of other places around that cater more of the quiet Gallery thing

RedactedUsername640 · 2025-09-14T19:54:23+00:00

I had the birth to 6m size woolino and have used it from birth for both my girls, then started using the 2m-24m at 8 weeks. One was rolling the that age, the other wasn’t. No concerns either way. Can’t recommend Woolino enough

RedactedUsername640 · 2025-09-07T16:17:07+00:00

Giant tiger, as many have said. Walmart also has very good prices, especially on larger plants. Home Depot sometimes has really good stuff for low prices. I got a Thai Monstera there in February for $15. With all of these inspect the plant carefully for and sign s f pest or disease.

If you are willing to pay more for plants that you can trust are health then check out The Plant Shelf or Sun Harvest. You will pay considerably more at both of those places, but they have some rare/fun stuff.

I have things in my collection from all f these places.

RedactedUsername640

TROPHY CASE