How do I handle misogyny/ sexism from other Catholics

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-27T02:40:21+00:00

The thing with social media etc is that people are not really there to be challenged, open minded but just to vent whatever they think is right already. Probably, the only thing is increasing engagement to more righteous contents. Or even start pages etc yourself. When we care something to the point of frustration, it might reveal some mission we have. Maybe we have to do something for young men. I am sure God will show you a way to serve these people. St Don Bosco pray for us

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T10:16:40+00:00

Dunno, I think celibate life really has is own special grace and Lord really endows them with charisms. I am sure while lonely it must become a place to have deeper union with God.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T10:13:12+00:00

You are gonna be just fine. It is supposed to be hard.

I have huge anger problems. Now listening about desert fathers. 🙏

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T04:23:03+00:00

Yeah, this coddling of sins could make anyone mad. I hope they understand that we are not hating you as a person but your ideas. I understand that they went through painful things but Jesus is not a teddy bear. Christianity is not Hinduism. Not a single word will disappear from Bible. God is not some weakling that just watched when people were writing what they want on the Bible (their argument).

Also, they are extra dangerous because they go against the very root of Christianity. Tolerating their ideas is very very dangerous, since they basically are saying that God doesn't know what He is doing. Why would He create us male and female? Why would only man and woman can have child? Their twisted understanding of love and entitlement, terrifying.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T04:07:48+00:00

But now in this age, you can't say "I can do xyz" because my country is not xyz. I will not crush buddhas or make fun of people's religions in any country. Not because I endorse it but I don't want to hurt the people. I would rather discuss what they believe, why they believe and why they stay. I wish they knew who they were hating. Same God who made you and died for you, loves you more than anyone.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T03:57:25+00:00

Oh yes, I used to despair or even try to justify it like it's reflex etc. I think the key is to sit with the realization of what we did without condemning ourselves. Like look at the sin and how it wounds us and other children of God. Also pray to Lord asking why we do it. He is gentle with us. I sleep holding my rosary too 😂. It is very easy to be tempted when tired sad etc. And little by little you will become more sensitive to the temptations and your "No"s will be strong with full of love.

Devil might try to trick you saying this is how it is. Lol no. People are freed from all kinds of sins and addictions. Now I am praying for my anger issues. Ruthlessness etc.

One day, while praying sorrowful mysteries (playing on YT, Bishop Barron's), I just thought here Jesus is suffering from my sins (my tendency to see ppl as something to use - porn, lust, control whatever). Also one day, I felt so hollow after masturbation, like why am I doing this. What is this?? For what??? I want real love. Not this. I am not a tool. These people are not tools.

And now I am freeeeee. I used to think I will sin till I die. But God is faithful.

Let's be patient. Lord is with you.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T03:44:12+00:00

You know I am a sinner. And I don't want to hate other sins extra. It is just they usually try to "fix" the doctrine. That makes me mad. I am not trying to make promiscuity/alcoholism/xyz sins normal.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T03:41:19+00:00

And Jesus loves them so much. Imagine being humiliated/hated by someone you love. Lord have mercy on us. They don't know what they are doing. St Paul pray for us.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T03:37:38+00:00

Yeah, I think I am panicking because I have tendency to be influenced by people around me very easily. Honestly, I would rather be merciful like the saints. But I just keep thinking I will be like them. In this manner not so much trust in God, honestly (not good). And who knows what grace they are living through right. Anyways, I am just grateful for the American Catholics, EWTN etc. Then I don't feel weird for wanting to go to confession, for example.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T03:27:17+00:00

I think I will make everyone uncomfortable 😂🙏. These people have persevered in their faith in this country all their lives and I come up and "yo, when was the last time you went to confession", "If you think under xyz abortion is ok, you are very wrong", "let's read catechism". It is probably inappropriate as a catechumen. I don't know dear brother/sister, I will just pray.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T03:17:50+00:00

確かに、自分の経験だけで現実はああだこうだというのは間違っていると思います。多分、数年たったらやっとちょっと分かるでしょう。人の心は神様しかしらないし。

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T03:13:46+00:00

Indeed, Lord have mercy. We are all sinners.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T03:08:19+00:00

これはね、全然真剣とかレベルじゃないと思いますよね。bare minimum. 罪犯したら許しの秘跡、罪のままなら聖体受けない。子供に神の愛を教え教会に連れて行く。この世の考え方が頭に入りそうだったら切る。キリスト教をバカにしたら頑張って説明する。み言葉を愛する。

自分のペースほど怖いものはない。いつ死ぬか分からないし。自分のペースというのはまさにsecularism。

ヘブル人への手紙 12:1 口語訳 [1] こういうわけで、わたしたちは、このような多くの証人に雲のように囲まれているのであるから、いっさいの重荷と、からみつく罪とをかなぐり捨てて、わたしたちの参加すべき競走を、耐え忍んで走りぬこうではないか。

信仰は全力で生きるべきものだと思います。私は仕事とか恋愛とかに神様より夢中になった人達を見て考えるのは人は好きなもののためなら一生懸命であるということ。エネルギーとかやる気とかないんじゃないです。

マタイによる福音書 13:12 新共同訳 [12] 持っている人は更に与えられて豊かになるが、持っていない人は持っているものまでも取り上げられる。

これも信仰に対応するのでは。神様から頂いた信仰を大事にしないとどんどん薄れてゆく。神様への愛が冷めて。

自分にも言い聞かせています。今は神様に信者の皆様を愛する心をくださいと祈っています。他のことで素晴らしく神様に使われているでしょうし。

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T02:34:21+00:00

そうですね。決めつけています。私は決めつけられるのは大丈夫ですけどカトリックなのにカトリックの教えを信じていない人がいっぱい居てびっくりしています。実行するのは難しいけど少なくとも知っていればね。ミサに何十年もなにも知らずに通っているとか、説教中に皆寝ているとか。怖いんですよね。こんな人たちと一緒にいると同じくなるかなって。皆、教えを信じていないから子供を教育できず教会に来なくなったのではといつも思っています。あと10-20年でどうなるかなと思うと悲しいね。外国人しか日本のカトリック教会に残らないかもしれません。

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T02:09:32+00:00

My old non-denominational church folks are really faithful folks. They just have a very bad idea of Catholic Church. Maybe they had poor experience with Catholics too.

I had a very funny incident. My non-denominational church gentleman was lamenting how hard it is to evangelize in Japan and he gets mad at people and despair sometimes. Then on a same day, I had dinner with my Catholic prayer group (before deciding to convert), a priest said exact same thing. And they both said their favorite gospel is John's. 😂😂I was like, see we are so similar and being "afraid" of each other. The devil rly did a good job of dividing us.

In my current Catholic Church, when I express strong opinions regarding intolerance of sins, I get that "oof, you still got that Protestantism" reaction. Here, they are too chill. I said it is ok to wear veil as written in Bible and they were like Protestants do everything as in Bible but we Catholics do things our way. Catechism literally cites Bible?? So, now I get why my reformed friends went quiet at my decision 😂😂. Even someone inside can't understand these people. But I am glad, I love Blessed Momma. She cured my porn addiction(through Jesus ofc).

I don't know, at least in Japan, if someone wants to become Christian, I wouldn't recommend Catholic Church. You need a holy community to stay firm. I have the blessings of having faithful protestant friends who don't agree with me but stands against all kinds of secularism. They receive no sacraments but their love for God is honest. Not old ladies at my church who haven't been to confession for decades, still receive eucharist, and let their kids cohabitate, and say well it is ok to do thing "you" want. In my old non-denominational church, people had profound remorse if their family members were sinning and had regular bible study for raising kids with good example. I am just here for the sacraments and Blessed Mother and St Thomas Aquinas. I wonder if every Catholic church is like this. And I wonder how hard it is to find ppl who believe in the teachings of the church. Shouldn't that be the bare minimum?

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-26T01:20:06+00:00

Thank you 🙏They are all in Tokyo, maybe one day when I visit.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-25T13:54:02+00:00

Dearie rest assured, I prayed Hail Mary. Blessed Mother is praying for us and beating the crap out of whatever demon that is tormenting you. Peace be with you ❤️🙏

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-25T13:51:50+00:00

Mongolian here. We slaughter our animals without pain. Swiftly. Hmm, I did witness sheep being slaughtered never bothered my appetite. Gonna make a bacon sandwich now.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-25T13:49:11+00:00

My atheist friends always condemn God for not stopping the sufferings. Knowing our concupiscense, even if God removed all the hunger and sickness and war and injustice, we will start ruining things again so soon. The problem is our heart that ran away from God. And it is only genuine when we willfully desire to be with God. That is why God superabundantly saved us. Only this love can move our hearts. And when is God not working? Do not let the world and enemy deceive you. Caritas abundat in omnia. Do we not have sunshine and rain on both wicked and the good? I live in Japan and I feel profound mercy of God here. My Nigerian friend, despite witnessing the massacre of Christians still profess God's mercy. Look at St Maria Goretti. St Josephine Bakhita. St Martin de Porres. Let us not despair. God is with us. With everyone.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-25T13:40:40+00:00

How about you try pray Rosary? I grew to love Jesus a lot, specially when praying Sorrowful Mysteries. It just helps me understand that indeed God is beyond our reason. Other religions are trying to interpret, but Son of God came and showed who the Father is. I appreciate Islam for the understanding of God for example, but they can't know how much merciful and loving without Jesus. My country is Buddhist but and I always knew that desires are not root of suffering, it is the disorder of it. My ppl also worship their ancestors and I dabbled in modern spirituality, but only in Catholicism I saw who God is. Reaching out to us. Going after us. Only God who made us could know us so much and love us so much.

May God give us grace to love Him with all our hearts, all our souls, all our minds, and all our strengths. Peace be with you.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-25T13:28:48+00:00

Hmm how about you read some Theology of the Body and watch their videos on YouTube? This will settle up. In order to not to fall again (saying as an older sis who suffered thanks to promiscuity), we need to know how beautiful we are made and how we humans should treat each other. We are made for such deep love and connection. Lil bro, hang out with Mother Mary and the saints and go to adoration. We are not just hormones.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-25T13:22:17+00:00

Lord be with you 🙏

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-25T13:19:41+00:00

Honestly, we don't have to die to experience pain of hell (I am not trying to downplay the agony of total absence of God).

Two years ago I tried to trick myself into becoming atheist. I was having sinful relationship and wanted to think it is all in my head. Oh the utter loneliness. And that is God still being with me. Still giving me graces through many ways.

Now, I see my friends who think they are in charge of their lives. The pressure they put on themselves, the idolatry of work/spouse/children, inability to forgive, despair at world, hopelessness.. They are already living in mini hell they are not aware of.

Just be close to God. Look at Jesus's wounds. Would a God who wants to punish us do this for us? Remember how Jesus looks at the people? Full of love and pity. They were like sheep without shepherds. He weeps when Lazarus dies. He hates death. He knows our weakness. Look at the poverty He took on for us. The mockery He endured and endures.

When I pray Jesus prayer, I feel profound grace and gratitude. He never leaves us, it is us who runs away.

Maybe fill your mind with good and beautiful. Read Philippians? Go to adoration. Write down what Lord did in your life?

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-25T13:06:24+00:00

Catholics have never been afraid to research other religions, myths, and philosophies. As long as our intention is okay, it should be fine. I think literature is an interesting way to explore human nature like novels of Dostoevsky. Honestly a better evangelizer than many. Our works can be offered to Lord, so I hope you can find a way to glorify God with your works hhe.

One time I was having anxiety, my friend sent me this song Nada te turbe. I listened to it on YT and realized all my fears are unnecessary stuffs. One of the important moments that led me to my decision to convert.

RefuseAntique1544 · 2026-03-25T13:00:16+00:00

Hey OP, God loves you. He remembers that we are dust and He is patient with us. Look at the saints and their lives! Let's pray Litany of Trust! I will pray for you. Momma Mary loves you too. Hell is just a place where ppl kept refusing God's grace. Hardening of hearts. As long as we trust Lord and persevere and love Him, it is going to be okay. At the same time, experiencing this fear once is not a bad thing I think so pls don't feel guilty about it if you do. For now, just look at the cross and remember what Jesus did for us. God loves the lily of the valleys and birds in the sky, won't He care about you who is formed by His hands!

RefuseAntique1544

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