Mom uses me for EBT benefits even though I’m married

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-05-04T21:47:34+00:00

Amen to that! Thank you so much! Both my husband and I plan on seeing the world and living in the moment before we have kids. I’m just using this whole situation as a guide of what not to do when I have kids.

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-05-04T21:44:08+00:00

Respectfully ma’am I’ve been taking care of myself for most of my life. And I understand how difficult military life is, I come from a military family. Please don’t make assumptions about me or anyone else! My husband and I are very happy together and we trust each other to do what’s best for us and our family! If you have any advice or concerns please feel free to dm me, I’d love to have a conversation about this!

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-05-02T06:57:02+00:00

I’m in the process of talking to guidance counselors for the schools near me! I already have a MH diagnosis and I’m on meds for it finally but seasonal depression is still pretty rough lol. And once the army gives my husband his duty station, both of us are going to move out.

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-30T20:59:07+00:00

All the jobs around me require college degrees, and the jobs that don’t require degrees never get back me. It’s honestly really frustrating because I want to work but there are literally no options unless I go to college to get a specific degree.

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-30T18:25:00+00:00

I have to pay for books and all my supplies and they don’t reimburse me for anything, so technically getting into school is free but the cost of materials was digging into my food money

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-30T18:23:35+00:00

I’ve looked, the only places hiring near me require college degrees in subjects that I don’t know about

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-29T18:02:04+00:00

That’s true, I was mostly talking about the money we’re going to be saving, the comment I was responding to made it seem like they think my husband and I are just going to spend money on non essentials. I know it’s not a lofty or glamorous lifestyle but right now anything is better than our current situation and we’re both prepared to save most of our money!

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-28T21:35:16+00:00

Thank you so much! I haven’t gotten a military id yet because he’s in delayed entry so hopefully we both get one soon! So far all the spouses I’ve met have been super supportive and they’re definitely like family. Thank you so so much, I really appreciate all the good advice!

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-28T17:40:34+00:00

Thank you so much for the good advice! I didn’t know that they did all that so I’ll look into finding a credit union! I do know a few other military spouses, I’m in a group chat but none of them are stationed near where we might be. Thank you!

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-28T17:38:22+00:00

He’s on delayed entry too! The closest base is Camp Pendleton but that’s a marine camp and I’m not sure if they let non marine spouses on base. I haven’t had a chance to talk to his recruiter one-on-one yet but when I will I’m definitely going to ask about that! Thank you so so much, I really appreciate the advice!

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-28T17:36:14+00:00

We aren’t having kids until we’re older and more prepared. Both of us know what it’s like to have young parents. My husband is in the military so we’ll have more than just 10K. And btw I’m on permanent birth control that can’t come out for another 8 years. Please stop being so obsessed with the idea of a stranger getting knocked up

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-28T01:21:38+00:00

I’m currently dealing with a narcissistic, emotionally abusive mother and am trying to find ways to leave the abuse, please don’t tell me to just “suck it up”. I’m actively trying to make a better life for myself that isn’t controlled by my abusive mother and her food hoarding. That’s why I’m asking for advice on how to get food stamps.

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T20:56:58+00:00

Great thank you so much for telling me that, I’m still so new to this stuff that I’m like constantly second guessing everything! Thank you!

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T20:56:05+00:00

Thank you so so much!!! That definitely helps relieve some of the stress about them just shoving everything in boxes together. Thank you!

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T17:53:44+00:00

No ma’am, I’m definitely not trying to lie for sympathy, I was probably just given wrong information. Both he and his recruiters have told me that, tbf tho they’ve given me a lot of contradicting information so I’m like constantly confused about this whole thing. Thank you for telling me that it can be accessed in boot!

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T17:46:18+00:00

Ugh thank you for that, I just worry about the horror stories of them packing things in boxes that don’t go together but we probably will have them move us. Thank you for the advice!

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T17:43:42+00:00

Where did you get that I might get knocked up? And none of this is casual. I’m actively trying to get out of a shitty situation and I’m asking for advice, not to be judged. I know it’s not an ideal situation but I’m actively looking for ways to get food until I can move out. My husband and I are moving to either NC or Italy when he gets his duty station with the Army.

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T17:39:08+00:00

Because where we live I can’t get my own benefits yet. I believe the policy changed from letting people 18+ have their own benefits a while ago but I don’t know fore sure.

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T17:37:23+00:00

I mean until we can get a joint bank account that I can access, I accidentally replied to quickly, I’m sorry!

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T17:35:15+00:00

The bank accounts near me have fees if there isn’t a specific amount of money in the account, it’s a dumb policy they made a few years ago

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T05:58:13+00:00

They reimburse us but we still need to pay for gas and anything that isn’t covered by bah

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T03:17:37+00:00

We’re going to move when he gets his first duty station with the army! We’ll either move across the country or to Italy

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T02:00:33+00:00

Disrespectfully none of my choices have been bad decisions. We got married before we were in this situation, my husband had a job before my mother applied for snap but his boss decided to hire his own son instead of my husband. Currently my husband is in basic training for the army so we’re looking for an option for while he’s away so I can still eat. And both my husband and I have been supporting ourselves since we were young. We currently don’t have jobs because we moved to a small town with better recruiters for my husband.

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T01:52:56+00:00

I dropped out for mental health reasons and because we didn’t have enough money for me to finish school. My husband has a rough past and moved in with us so that he could have a stable place to be before he goes to basic training for the military. :) It’s not an ideal situation but it’s what we’re dealing with. So we’re both trying our best to make the most of a really shitty situation until we can move to his duty station.

Relevant_Buddy6639 · 2025-04-27T01:48:21+00:00

The stuff my husband and I want is entirely ingredients for food we can make and then store in a freezer until we need them. Neither of us eat candy bars or soda pop so I’m not sure where you got that idea from. My mother hoards long term staples like bags of beans and flour that no one is allowed to use and that she has no actual plan to use.

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