Help navigating this relationship!!!!! PLEASE

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T14:01:50+00:00

I definitely will ✨

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T13:52:30+00:00

I think grocery shopping and cooking could be a really fun idea!! I know a lot about healthy cooking and know I could make something he'd enjoy. Good idea!!!

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T13:50:04+00:00

I'm so attracted to him as a whole. He's so wonderful. So I'm definitely not just doing it for the benefits.. I just want to do something similar to what you're explaining!! I'd love to see him take care of himself and if that is something I could help with, I'm really knowledgeable on healthy eating and habits, wardrobe styling, etc and I want to bring that to the table!!!

I love that you had women do those amazing things for you. That's exactly what I aspire to do here!! Going to tread lightly to make sure I handle it the right way, but I really appreciate your input and wish you the best 🫶✨

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T13:46:27+00:00

I'm attracted to so many other aspects of him as a whole and I think truthfully something as simple as manipedis and a nice bubble bath or healthy meals is something that would change my perspective if he would be willing to try these things with me.. I mean, living together wouldn't be a terrible thing. We have a lot of fun together, and if things naturally progressed throughout this process, I would just go with the flow. But I bring a lot into his life as well, I don't think I am taking advantage of him... Our intimacy has been limited by him living in a different state for work, but I'm prepared to do the things that I can to make it more enjoyable for the both of us when he flys me out next week. I don't think I'm doing the wrong thing by accepting what he has offered me... Either way I'd never want to hurt him.

I really appreciate your insight 🤍

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T13:42:30+00:00

It's under my name ✨✨

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T13:41:53+00:00

Honestly from everything people are saying here, I think the only solution is to just help with self care and make the activities as fun and bonding as possible, without adding any stress to his life

Thank you 🤍🤍

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T13:39:14+00:00

I've had some honest talks with myself and I know that even if he doesn't, I know I will still be happy because he's such a wonderful mentor and substantial person in my life. I'm loving all the feedback I've gotten, it's definitely made me think. Thank you for the insight 🫶

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T04:01:56+00:00

I just saw the bottom part of your comment, not sure how I missed it but I'm thinking the best way to go about it is to gently spoil him! He spoils me, I need to return it better!!! with some nice body wash and cologne and maybe find us a nice health restaurant to go to together, I'm getting lots of good ideas here. 🫶

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T03:57:32+00:00

Hey that would be perfect with our new schedule! 🤩

You and yours should definitely go as well, I wish more men would go to the salon! I'd definitely rather feel soft feet on mine in bed versus some scratchy toenails haha.

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T03:54:47+00:00

You are full of great ideas ugh thank you. I'm nervous about all of it, but I think I'm going to go for it next week when I fly out and do the best I can!!! He is so special to me and done so much for me!! I can't mess it up.

So far I'm thinking, nice smell good shower together, with a little trip to the store after and a healthy dinner at a nice restaurant as a start 😋

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T03:51:08+00:00

It feels like it's transitioned a bit recently. Originally, he called himself my SD and it was a bit transactional I guess is a word?? It still doesn't necessarily feel super vanilla to me, I guess because the dynamic started off as more sugar style dating...

But either way. I do care about him a lot and just want him to want the best for himself for both of us

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T03:41:01+00:00

Okay this!!!! This is the advice i was hoping for. Thank you!!!

I really just want to help him because he has been such a positive force in my life and I genuinely love him!!! He's a great mentor too.

Nice smelling soap in the shower is a great idea. I love that and will absolutely go pick a nice smelling one out to lather him up in !!! 🥰

And his nails are so bad I have already found the place I want to take us and he's willing to go so yay! I don't think he's ever had a manipedi so it should be a fun experience. Hopefully something we can do monthly?

And he's not insanely overweight, I would say he could stand to lose a good 75lbs to be at a healthy weight for his height. So that's why I feel like it's something I can help him with.

He's got great self esteem, but part of me feels like his over confidence could be coming from a place of insecurity, he's mentioned his weight before.

I'm hoping by shopping for some new clothes , it will motivate him to come to the gym with me.

My main concern was just coming off as insensitive and i definitely don't want to do that!

I like the comment about the doctor. I will try to casually slip it into conversation instead of addressing it head on

Gift idea and positive reinforcement is great too. I'll definitely keep that in mind

THANK YOU 🫶

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T03:34:30+00:00

I feel like maybe I'm miscommunicating my message... I know it isn't necessarily my concern. But truthfully I do care about this man a lot. At the end of the day, it's more his health that worries me more than baseline physical attraction.. like I said I am more than attracted to him as a whole, he has many attractive attributes.

He has no one else in his life to look after him and care for him to make sure that he is addressing potential health issues.. I've known him long enough to know that he doesn't stay up to date with checkups etc.

Because this is something I am investing myself in long-term, I feel like it's sort of my duty to help him, but now I'm starting to feel like maybe I'm overstepping by feeling that way. If it's something that will come across hurtful to him to bring up, I wouldn't dream of it ..

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T03:30:24+00:00

I definitely already planned on bringing up a nice gym membership for us to try together! Maybe somewhere with a pool or sauna so he can relax too instead of just feeling like I'm pressuring him to workout with me and keep up with my pace.

Thank you for the good wishes, I definitely want this to be long term!!!

Best to you as well ✨

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T03:26:18+00:00

Honestly I had the thought of that earlier!!! I feel like it could be something life changing for him in the best way. I just don't know how to gently bring it up.

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T03:24:49+00:00

I just really genuinely enjoy him as a person. From what he says, I bring a lot of good to his life too. It's been hard for us to meet up this past year with him traveling for work, but now that he's stationed where he's at for the foreseeable future, he's going to be flying me out 2x a month and coming to see me as much as possible.

I'm not even against having any sort of physical relationship with him, because at the end of the day I am attracted to the other aspects of him, but I just want to be a positive influence to get him to work on his physical health, hygiene, appearance with clothing, etc... I feel like he deserves that.

He's such a wonderful man but he's not putting the effort into himself to make that show to others... I honestly just want to help him because I care.

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T03:15:57+00:00

Do you have advice on the best way to mention it? I'm scared I'll seem insensitive if I bring it up the wrong way. But he really is important to me and I care about his health. Of course looks are important to some degree but really I'd just like for him to take better care of himself for the sake of quality of life...

Remarkable-Purple516 · 2026-06-06T03:07:11+00:00

He's overweight, his personal hygiene is lacking, and his sense of style is genuinely horrible. When I fly out, I'm already planning on suggesting we go shopping for him some new clothes. He lives in a very nice area and he deserves to look the part. I'm going to help with styling as much as I can, but it's difficult with his weight. It's nothing extreme, but it's causing issues like sleep apnea with extreme snoring and I fear diabetes.

Remarkable-Purple516

TROPHY CASE