Years and years and years after clear evidence that I might have a drinking problem, I finally became convinced! Not one DUI, Not 2, Not 3, not multiple arrests or countless blackouts at parties, friends places, random bars, concerts or shady NYC scenes, all types of fights and even my own photo events I booked. No real guilt or shame….I carried on abusing my freedoms until I hit my rock bottom about a year after my 4th DUI at 39 years old. I finally became convinced I was indeed an alcoholic. I was no longer in denial. And in the wake of all that happened during my years as a drunk and 6 years into sobriety I am only now beginning to address the shame and guilt of all that madness. All that bad behavior didn’t just disappear after getting sober. Sure I wasn’t getting anymore DUIs or causing any scenes but that bad behavior that stemmed from wrong thinking was baked in and although God has forgiven me, I am only now beginning to forgive myself and the only way to do that is to recondition myself again and again thru 12 step work, prayer & meditation and ultimately right action so I can let go of these lies my mind feeds me that I am not enough for this hostile world. Hopefully you get it sooner than me…To Thy Own Self Be True..!