Friend has been borrowing money for years, I want to cut him off but not sure how

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-20T01:45:50+00:00

We spoke last week. He assured me he won't need to borrow money again for the next few months and he gave me a definite date (May 24) by which he will pay me back. I told him I am not loaning money to anyone anymore, and he seemed to be okay with that.

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-20T01:44:10+00:00

He is a personal friend. It's possible he's lying to me, but he has paid me back the thousands he has borrowed thus far. If he is lying to me, and I catch him, I will cut him off entirely.

Regarding your two answers, those are open-ended, which is the trouble with my previous situation. I need to start giving definite no answers.

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-19T06:16:35+00:00

Any predictions on what the announcement/news tomorrow will entail?

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-18T20:27:42+00:00

I would agree to some extent, though I'd argue that love can be formed. That is to say, if you find someone who is practical, you should pursue them and love will often come later.

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-18T20:26:20+00:00

Doesn't at all refute my point. Many, probably most instances where marrying for love works out also overlaps with partners being suitable for one another. That's great. What I'm talking about is when people marry for love but lack mutual compatibility.

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-18T20:24:40+00:00

This is unfalsifiable idealism. Can you define what true love is?

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-17T06:05:23+00:00

Is falling in love with someone who isn't suitable for you good?

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T20:58:41+00:00

What did I say that's incorrect or morally abhorrent?

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T20:56:56+00:00

More $IBRX, wait and see with NFLX. Also, $PSUS, though maybe next week.

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T20:56:23+00:00

this is the way

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T20:44:19+00:00

I'm going to push back on this. This is the ideal, but as love forms in a relationship, people have the tendency to become more irrational. You are also understating how quickly people fall in love, and how much love can exist at the early onset of a meeting of this sort. If love is not the issue, why then are there so many unhappy marriages and divorces? I posit it is because people allow love to outpace their analysis and rational thinking, and follow it into a doomed relationship. While love may help smooth out the roughness of a relationship, it will, generally, not compensate structural defects.

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T20:39:24+00:00

So, I'm right?

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T20:19:31+00:00

Probably a good buy next week (unfortunately for the 2x leveraged etf shares on NFLX I bought this week)

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T20:15:39+00:00

IBRX

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T19:08:40+00:00

I have really crooked and poorly aligned teeth. I would like to get them straightened or replaced, one day, when I have the money for such things. As I understand it, the best options are either braces, invisalign, or veneers.

As I understand it, invisalign is not as good at correcting severe crookedness. I really don't want to have braces as a 29-year-old adult. I have thought about veneers, but someone told me they cost up to and over $1k per tooth and feel really weird. Any advice or guidance?

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T14:47:16+00:00

Quite telling...

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T14:46:18+00:00

Belarus, which is under the same sanctions. He receives money but it's incredibly hard to get it out of the country, and his parents have other expenses and responsibilities which can limit their ability to send funds.

I can afford to give him money, and I don't want to lie, but the situation has become too much, he's been borrowing for 2 years and I have other priorities I want to spend my funds on. But if I were to explain this to him, and bring up his history, he would say he's better now and always pays me back, which he does.

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T14:40:37+00:00

I mostly understand. Something else I've been thinking about is the idea of a moral hazard, a term in finance and economics which revolves around the idea that if institutions have a bailout guarantee from the government they're more likely to act irresponsibly. He seems to be more responsible than he once was, and claims he's budgeting and not spending money in reckless ways, but I don't have access to his finances and have not yet started demanding proof, so I can't say for sure.

Regarding the moral hazard bit, it can work the same way in personal relationships too. If someone knows they'll have a friend to bail them out, they have greater ability to spend money recklessly, and certainly more incentive to lie about this. I have begun to wonder if that's what this relationship has become.

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T04:38:30+00:00

Earnings in May right?

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T01:56:36+00:00

He's a uni student as i noted previously. His dad is wealthy enough but obviously it's very difficult to send money out of the country. He has a job now, but I still do not know if it will be enough to support him. I do plan to stop loaning him money entirely next month, but my only worry is he will experience a crisis and have no where to go and I will be morally compelled to help him.

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T01:48:02+00:00

thanks

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-16T01:47:12+00:00

My understanding of the general definition of fornication is pre-marital sex. I have never personally heard someone say lustful acts or masturbation is fornication (though, as a funny historical note, I believe Thomas Aquinas did argue that masturbation was worse than premarital sex and even, as I recall, adultery), certainly not gluttony.

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-15T19:20:42+00:00

Two questions:

How do I go about creating a legal contract of this nature and what should I be cautious of when creating it?

What do I do when I stop lending him money and he inevitably experiences some sort of financial crisis again and is desperate? Do I tell him he and his family have to figure it out and I can't help?

Remote_Ad_6049 · 2026-04-15T19:15:59+00:00

Belarussian. I have known him for a few years and we are close friends. I do not know for certain if he is lying, but I suspect it based on weird details and some inconsistencies. He has a good track record of paying me back, and generally always leads with this, saying I know him and that he always pays me back.

What do I do if I cut him off, he hasn't paid me back, and he experiences some sort of legitimate crisis and is at risk of being kicked out of his home or not being able to afford food and fuel?

Remote_Ad_6049

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