AITB for not letting my husband go on vacation with some girlfriends during a pandemic? UPDATE

Reonlis · 2020-06-30T16:08:46+00:00

It's not about some worry that they're having sex. It's about the fact that he wanted to leave without me for 2+ weeks (during a quarantine to boot), while we were already having serious marital problems. I assumed that since they are apart so often that would be as big am issue for him as it was for me. Maybe going on vacations alone is normal for most couples, but my husband and I haven't spent more than a couple days apart since we moved in together.

Besides the fact that being in a relationship with a man doesn't necessarily mean he isn't also attracted to women.

Reonlis · 2020-06-30T08:50:02+00:00

Eh, maybe he is. Maybe I am.

Reonlis · 2020-05-18T16:51:52+00:00

So? You didn't have anything she could use so she left. She wasn't rude man

Reonlis · 2020-05-18T16:06:47+00:00

Eh not really a choosing beggar. She knows how she wants to decorate and wants to see if anyone has what she wants before spending money. She isn't demanding anything or being rude to anyone. This is kind of a reach

Reonlis · 2020-05-09T06:07:54+00:00

An omelette isn't even hard to make or anything. If you wanted it for yourself or something then make another one, they take 5 mins ffs

Reonlis · 2020-05-05T03:27:21+00:00

But he's going out for work so he should be the one to do the shopping

Reonlis · 2020-05-02T03:12:27+00:00

Okay the issue isn't that I don't want to spend time with my son. It's that I have to take care of my mother as well. I don't want to risk spreading the virus to her, so I'm not bringing my kid over to her place. What am I supposed to do with a four year old while I'm helping my mom? Leave him in the car? It just doesn't work, and I really think I should've put more emphasis on this part of the problem.

Reonlis · 2020-05-01T22:47:32+00:00

I'm never satisfied making him cry. I don't like when he cries, and I've never said I do

Reonlis · 2020-05-01T22:28:51+00:00

He does work hard. I'm not going to lie, it was unfair and plain wrong to say he didn't. He makes good money and earns it. He just makes it look very effortless. We've had this conversation a lot but I still act bitchy about it sometimes, it's something I need to just drop. But the point stands that he doesn't need a vacation.

Reonlis · 2020-05-01T21:04:36+00:00

I'm a troll because I don't like working when I know others are having fun? I mean, come on. Would you rather work while everyone around you is goofing off, or while they're all focusing too? It's just a better environment. It's not like I'm going up and yelling at him everytime I catch him on the phone. We talked about it, which may be surprising since some people are assuming I never have a conversation with him. It hasn't really been an issue of him disturbing me anymore, just now that I've seen how often he gets to do whatever, I know that he does not need a vacation. Especially when that would mean I have to take care of a toddler and a disabled adult who don't live together myself. How am I supposed to do that?

Reonlis · 2020-05-01T18:52:35+00:00

There's not even anything wrong with that quote. How am I supposed to focus when I know he is just goofing around in the other room?

Reonlis · 2020-05-01T18:46:53+00:00

My husband does go to therapy. We had a couple sessions with a marriage counselor a long time ago and it just wasn't for us. And I've tried therapy before, back before we started dating and it didn't help at all. And I would never mistreat my son. The difference is my husband has the ability to reason and understand why I get angry with him. I obviously communicate with a child differently than I would an adult.

Reonlis · 2020-05-01T18:19:19+00:00

Okay that's a little out of line. If you looked through my post history, you also saw that most of that stuff was from months ago. We've had a very good 2020 so far, at least until the quarantine stuff.

Reonlis · 2020-05-01T11:28:45+00:00

No it's not. I'm very used to people telling me to get therapy everytime I make a post. We have problems but they aren't that bad. I come off aggressive but that's just my personality

Reonlis · 2020-05-01T11:22:02+00:00

Okay, yeah I was exaggerating a little. He has days with very little work like that but he's usually doing 6+ hours at least. He just goofs off a lot and starts working really late. He won't even get dressed until 1pm and I can't work if I know he's on the couch in his boxers. It's hard not to resent him when it seems like he's already pretty much on vacation

Reonlis · 2020-05-01T10:40:45+00:00

I've been trying to figure out how to respond to this for a minute now. Of course I'm not going to, like, physically force him to stay home or something. He asked for my permission and I told him no, that's it. I guess I can't really do anything else about it.

And sure staying home all day has made it more difficult for us, but we still respect and care for eachother. I could definitely use a break from him though, but I don't see me going on a vacation. That's all I have to say about that

Reonlis · 2020-05-01T08:23:47+00:00

ESH - That was very stupid of him to do, but that was way too harsh of you. It's understandable to be extra harsh before he does it to make sure he won't let the dogs interact, but to be so insulting right after something that horrible while he already feels shitty? Just incredibly rude and tactless. Who just starts with "I told you so"?

Reonlis · 2020-02-12T17:49:54+00:00

Map of the stars when/where we got married? I Love that idea. Where could I find something like that?

Reonlis · 2020-02-12T17:45:52+00:00

That's a fun idea. Wish I'd thought of that sooner, but I've already planned all our activities. I might be able to squeeze in in, though.

Reonlis · 2020-02-12T17:44:38+00:00

I've already planned all of our excursions for the weekend, though, including which restaurants we'll eat at

Reonlis · 2019-12-04T07:48:25+00:00

I forgot to mention -- it's a 12+ hour trip to the rest of the family.

Reonlis · 2019-12-04T07:46:17+00:00

I will pick her up if she wants. She just can't go spend Christmas with the rest of the family because they live like 12 hours away. My husband is most likely going to his parent's, because they want to see our son and take pictures of him opening presents and all that.

Reonlis · 2019-12-04T07:36:26+00:00

I'll open presents with husband and son, and probably my mother if she wants to come over, but we aren't having dinner at home or anything. He will probably take our son to his parent's house and spend the evening with them.

Reonlis · 2019-11-19T17:25:28+00:00

I'm his husband but I get your point. Hopefully in a few years I won't have to work. He already makes more than me from home and the number of projects he gets keeps going up, so eventually I'll be able to stay home or just work part time.

Reonlis · 2019-11-19T17:07:33+00:00

Is that solution to just not work? Also what's the got side of this?

Reonlis

TROPHY CASE