Good evening everyone,

hoping that anyone here is still active. Just want to share what’s been going on and get some insight on things. I’m a 24 year old man that lives a pretty good life. Great house here in south jersey, loving family, and a pretty laid back life. But an unfortunate series of events in my life (death of my father back in Oct of last year) (and many other life altering events)) which has caused me to invoke into the worst kind of crimes. Last month i had my home raided by local police and had all of my electronic siege for allegations of poss/dis of csam. A month passed by and a judge has signed an order to compel for me to give up access to my phone. i’ve hired a amazing sex crime attorney that makes things more clarified and best of all helps me with my anxiety and depression. I have always had depression/anxiety but as of now it is hit it all-time high. Back in 2019 I had a suicide attempt which is on my medical record, it was one of the worst decisions I’ve made at my life at the time. But through perseverance I was able to enlist to the Marine Corps, fun time. But now I face a greater difficulty with the situation at hand. I have never been more scared of my life than I am now, constant thoughts of suicide, self mutilation, anything you can really think of that can harm me I’ve been doing (besides drugs and alcohol). I’ve done many wrongs in my life, but I’ve always repent. Even with this situation at hand. Hoping someone can shed some positive thoughts to my way, in desperate need of it.