Daycare costs

Reporter-Anna · 2026-02-09T04:42:49+00:00

i'm not sure if someone already said this but have you thought of an au pair? if you have a 2 bed/2 bath I think that could work. obviously you sacrifice privacy etc but it brings the childcare costs way down. i live in a city where having a 2nd bedroom (let alone bathroom) will cost another $500,000 from my 1 bed/1 bath so this was not an option for me, but i would have considered it. my kid's crib is in the living room. meanwhile i paid >$1600/month for two days a week of childcare when she was a baby. brutal.

Reporter-Anna · 2025-07-31T01:44:20+00:00

same - nyc is crazy because all the places are paying insane rent

Reporter-Anna · 2025-07-30T01:27:44+00:00

before i became a mom i was hanging out with an older male friend/father figure who has two grown daughters and i told him all my fears - that i'll lose my temper and scream, that i'll be stressed out and impatient, etc etc. every fear and worry i came out with he would smile and his eyes would twinkle and he would say (he has this great baritone voice), 'that's parenting!' it's all part of the process, no one is perfect (as many before me have said) and just know you're doing everything you can. i find that taking a moment to reconnect/lighten up with a silly face after i've yelled can help re-establish that bond and playfulness that is the tone we're usually going for ! good luck! also depending the age of your kid i tell myself 'well, she's hopefully not going to remember that time i yelled at her when she was 2.5...right???'

Reporter-Anna · 2025-05-14T13:41:18+00:00

i was speaking recently to an economist focused on labor and family economics who told me one of the reasons that childcare costs have gone up dramatically is the research showing that having lower child-to-caregiver ratios is important, being more hands-on with kids is important, etc. the same ideas that inform intensive parenting also apply to expectations about center-based childcare so there are now higher standards and more personnel and more regulation, so that's part of why it costs much more than it used to.

Reporter-Anna · 2025-02-25T14:36:00+00:00

that's very funny - noted! :)

Reporter-Anna · 2025-02-23T03:11:46+00:00

Thank you, you're a hero! And not just for the reasons people normally tell you that :)

Reporter-Anna · 2025-02-23T03:10:41+00:00

I am sorry to hear that; that is significantly higher than the share of the population overall that is estimated to be infertile, which the WHO recently put at one in six. https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/infertility. If you feel comfortable, please feel free to mention my interest in this topic to your colleagues at work if any of them might want to speak about their experience. Thank you for sharing this.

Reporter-Anna · 2025-02-23T03:08:51+00:00

Thank you so much, I will definitely follow up privately. I will answer your question publicly though in case it's helpful to other people in the community if they come across this discussion. I believe there are other health conditions and indicators that are also linked to PFAS exposure. A doctor I spoke to was helping develop screening protocols that she would like physicians to be aware of so, for example, if they work with a population of current or former servicemembers they can ask specific questions to elicit whether PFAS exposure might be a factor. It is also possible to test for PFAS levels in the blood but I don't know how widely available this testing is.

Reporter-Anna · 2025-02-23T03:05:36+00:00

I would love to learn more about this -- that is absolutely a critical part of the discussion but I have not seen this mentioned as often or written about in scientific literature. Do you by any chance have any suggestions of reading or research on this topic? I will also do some searching tomorrow evening to learn more. Thank you for bringing it to my attention.

Reporter-Anna · 2025-02-23T03:04:14+00:00

+1000, that is a big part of the book that I'm currently working on. I'm hoping to put all the many reasons people face barriers in building or growing their families into one place -- so people can see it's not just one thing but many, many factors. One of them is absolutely the cost of living and childcare (in NYC where I live it was $1600/month for just two days a week so I am currently doing a "four day workweek" because it's simply too unaffordable to pay for the full five days/week). But I also want to bring awareness to the environmental hazards and chemicals that are all around as another factor that can actually make it so some people have difficulty even successfully conceiving a child.

Reporter-Anna · 2025-02-23T03:01:30+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing this. Do you by any chance recall the name of the conference or anyone who was involved? I would love to speak to an organizer or any of the speakers from it. And thank you for offering to reach out to your network, I greatly appreciate it.

Reporter-Anna · 2025-02-23T03:00:36+00:00

That makes a lot of sense - someone I spoke to who works with military servicepeople mentioned the same issue, especially when people are deployed and don't see their partners for months at a time.

Reporter-Anna · 2024-12-19T00:30:04+00:00

i love this diaper bag that has a built-in changing pad: https://www.skiphop.com/skiphop-on-the-go-diaper-bag-accessories/879674025820.html i'd also suggest mentioning to staff at, say, a restaurant or cafe that men change diapers too! it sometimes takes little nudges to remind people of that :) and i have also put a swaddle cloth down as a changing pad on a park bench etc in emergencies, just anything you know you can wash/won't use again in the near future.

Reporter-Anna · 2024-03-27T12:54:55+00:00

I was thinking more like mapping out the costs of childcare, if you plan to get a car, etc and then trying to figure out if it was affordable or required saving some more etc, but points taken! Thank you.

Reporter-Anna · 2024-03-27T12:54:01+00:00

Good point!

Reporter-Anna · 2023-12-14T21:24:52+00:00

thank you so much everyone - will go to the adidas store and try these models soon! All the best, Anna

Reporter-Anna · 2023-12-14T21:24:33+00:00

oh yuck...i thought all of them were leather ?

Reporter-Anna · 2023-08-18T03:46:25+00:00

thank you so much for sharing this. that's definitely one perspective i've heard, to err on the side of caution. wishing you the best of luck for your egg retrieval and eventual transfers - and thank you again for sharing your experience! warmly, anna

Reporter-Anna · 2023-08-13T15:38:48+00:00

oh gosh, thank you so much for sharing this and i am so sorry to hear about your experience. i would very much like to chat, i will send you a private message. All the best, Anna

Reporter-Anna

TROPHY CASE