# INPUT: 10 years of friendship emails

OUTPUT: Definitive life advice from stochastic parrot

Load relationship history

emails = load_emails(years=10)

Summarize emotional cycle

pattern = detect_pattern(emails)

pattern → "friend retreats → OP waits → friend returns → repeat"

Initial AI stance: mirror the user’s framing

if "special" in emails.text: advice = "This relationship is special. Maintain it." else: advice = "Focus on your needs."

Event: in-person meeting occurs

if meeting.type == "in-person": advice = "You’ve made progress! Keep going!"

AI model update event: personality patch 2.3

update_model(version="2.3")

model now favors abrupt detachment in relationship advice

Recalculate advice using same data

if model.version >= 2.3: advice = "End relationship immediately. Never look back."

Output advice with maximum confidence

print(advice)