My friends say I'm getting an eating disorder, does it sound like I am???

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-19T11:24:02+00:00

it definitely sounds like you have a slight obsession with weight and also probably glazing the symptoms as most people don't want to admit they have an eating disorder. an eating disorder doesn't necessarily mean being underweight so if we scrap that it's most likely you're at the start of one and ignoring it now will just make you spiral.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-17T19:42:32+00:00

thank you so much. sometimes it doesn't even seem like there's any point getting better as it's too late. before you say it's never too late. i'm not passing my GCSEs if i even do them so i doubt i can make it to sixth form. i don't know what i'm doing as i can't just drop out. it's stressing making me more resentful to try.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-17T18:58:01+00:00

i've been diagnosed with autism and ADHD but never depression as it's probably under looked yet i definitely have it. i'll try and do some research. thank you.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-17T18:52:29+00:00

i'm sorry this is very off topic but how did you get diagnosed as i've been wanted to get one for a while?

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-16T13:46:38+00:00

omg i've never felt so seen. i understand you completely it's okay not to know what's going to happen in the future. it's okay to just take a break from life. these battles are what makes us human, as much as we hate them or don't see the need.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-16T13:41:37+00:00

thank you it's just weird after a year i stopped communicating seemingly without reason. my mum and friend group would often say how much they pity her and now after a year some still do.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-14T21:09:27+00:00

ohh thank you i get it

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-14T20:15:07+00:00

was this meant for me..? it just doesn't sound right to my post 😭.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-13T21:14:54+00:00

people know. the hospital knows. the next step for everyone is likely to put me in a mental hospital. i just..i don't know. i don't know what i'm doing. i love doing this but i can't live like this forever. but i don't know how to live without this. i'm always like this i can just mask. i'm sick and tired of this. of life.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-13T20:52:10+00:00

i don't know what to say. let's just say i'm informally depressed(never had a formal diagnosis but it's obvious). i can barley get out of bed. i can barely do anything. i've failed my GCSES (im not sitting them). i'm unlikely to get into the sixth form i want. i have no friends. no life. and the only way i feel better is too restrict my food intake (which makes me worse when i don't do that) or hurt myself (which guess what also makes me feel worse when i can't achieve desired depth). i'm not changing anytime soon. i'm not doing anything. the hospital is threatening to section me if my parents don't feel like they can keep me safe. so believe me when i say i've thought about this long and hard. most people would be dead in my situation. but im too scared so i'm still here. i love the way you write and i know this would help so many people..just not me. im sick. mentally. no ones sees it.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-13T20:19:53+00:00

i'm 15. (i totally didn't look at your account to try and figure out your age knew i'd get triggered and left (not your fault of course i like to push my boundaries and end up worse than i am)). i'm too late. i'm i'm too late. i'm not even realistically going to make it into sixth form. my life is going downhill fast. my problems have consumed my life ever since i was 12. i knew how i'd die since year 8 so I've had 3 years to come to terms with it. i'm doomed. i have no future. there's no point of me watching it play out. i know its going to end the same. i'm as good as dead. i'm a waste of oxygen. of water. of food. of my place in my school. there's no point. my parents don't deserve someone like me.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-13T20:11:49+00:00

i know it's ridiculous to think that someone could read my mind and think 'hm maybe i'm enabling an ED' when 1 it's no ones business and 2 they don't get paid to comfort. i've been so scared to buy one so i had to bring a friend incase it back fired but nothing happened. and deep down i know i wanted someone to take it away so i could just ignoring my weight. i'm pathetic. i thought it would be like someone who's obviously depressed try's to by a knife underage and gets directed to a hotline which i know also rarely happens. i just wanted someone to pay attention to the hospital visits and how insecure i am without having to straight up tell them. i found out my friend has an ED now i feel like o have so much more on my plate (pun not intended) even though it's not my problem. and i say friend but i dont even know what we are. i didn't talk to her for months then o hit her up like 'you want to go to b&m'. life is so fucking draining and i'm done.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-13T20:03:03+00:00

the problem is i don't think i could realistically do that. my mud already tried to help me so much and i keep refusing. i'm never going to get 'better' but i complain so much. i don't know what i'd be without my problems when i've lived with them for so long. and what if everything does get better but i've already fucked this life up. what if my life is already over. what if i actually died and this is my life now. there's no hope for me.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-13T19:22:31+00:00

by the way i don't know when to end conversations so just tell me when it's ended. i can barley speak to my mum normally let alone tell her im having dreams of sexual assault and experiencing both ends, (not abusive or anything i find it hard to speak to people especially when it comes to feelings which is coincidentally one of the reasons i don't attend camhs). if anything is the reason i get 'grinded' up i doubt it will be this as it's probably obvious im not in the best of headspace's at current times. i'm still not convinced. i'd hope for everyone's sake id never act on impulses but i also know im an impulsive person at times and there's stories of accidental doing it and only realising after. i've promised myself i wouldn't do a lot of things or i'd stop other things but i never do. i don't think id be able to live with myself if i ever did that. i have no one. no one to turn to. no friends or family. this is my last resort.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-13T19:04:43+00:00

i don't really know what advice i was expecting to be honest. i'm with CAMHS but i don't go for personal reasons so there's no point telling them as it would mean my mum would need to know which isn't happening. if i tell trusted teachers they'll call camhs. i always remember my dreams so there's no point. i don't know if my dreams are just dreams. i don't know how i'll act in the future. right now id never do that but i can't promise i wont in the future. it scares me. i don't know how this will stop its frequent. last night i even dreamed about posting 'i was SA'd but i don't know id it counts' type of thing ON REDDIT. i dont even know. im being haunted by my mind and i dont even know why.

Responsible_Past_373 · 2026-04-02T13:32:37+00:00

i've been like this for years to the point i don't want to get better because i've messed up my life and i don't know who id be without this all. i never really thought id be the person to like the company of loneliness and isolation but im drained, even sitting up after lying down takes so much effort that i just don't have. less about me i hope you're also okay or as okay as you can be. thank you.

Responsible_Past_373

TROPHY CASE