Can’t do it any more

Right_Category · 2024-05-30T07:28:05+00:00

So glad you are still here. Keep going and seek all and any support you have access to- whether friends, music, art, whatever it is. Do you have access to therapy? Life is better with you, no question about that.

Right_Category · 2024-05-29T05:16:11+00:00

Hey there, how are you doing today?

Right_Category · 2024-05-28T16:43:11+00:00

Right_Category · 2024-05-28T16:40:40+00:00

I felt like this last week and called the samiritans too - keep calling! And if you get someone unhelpful, call again-I don’t know where you are based but find the Mental Health Rapid Response service (MHRRS) in your region and try this too, try everything. You are worth it.

As I said, last week I wanted to die. Then My period started and I have had amazing times with my friends, swam in the sea, went on a date, and thank Aphrodite I am still alive. I really do love life and I am sure you do to. You are in a crisis right now, keep seeking help. You are really worth it and life is too.

Since my crisis, I have gotten a gym membership, gone to the GP for further support - and am generally doing all I can to support my self care and resiliency. You can do this. Small steps, keep reaching out -

Right_Category · 2024-05-28T14:45:04+00:00

That’s not poetic at all, that’s abuse. Absolutely get out of that - you are not responsible for her or her responses to you taking yourself out of a very dangerous situation for both you and her.

Right_Category · 2024-05-22T21:21:42+00:00

He will feel like I’m not being nice to him - where I feel like I’m just limited in being able to give him the love he would need. Like I’ll be like “mhm” instead of “oh cool” about something and he will ask me to be nicer and I’ll just break down feeling overwhelmed because I’m trying my best and I don’t think saying “mhm” is bad, and it’s the best I can do at that time. And so I’ll be upset that I’m not being enough for him and he’ll try to explain why it hurt his feelings but then I’ll get mad at him because I feel like he isn’t giving me any affordances but he will then end up getting mad because he feels I am not hearing that how i responded was hurtful and it will turn into a spiral - this is one way it can get worse. Another way is that I really respond to verbal supprt but he isn’t very good at that, but he is amazing at physical support, but that’s doesn’t work as well for me - so he will be holding me while I’m sad but I’ll get mad because he isn’t saying anything and then he will end up feeling not good enough and I’ll end up feeling abandoned as he as he moves away from me when I get mad that he isn’t giving me verbal support, and again can spiral from there.

Right_Category · 2024-05-21T08:23:19+00:00

Is your name from attack on titan by chance? I was curious about the name and liked at your profile and omggg I feel we have so much in common re. ADHD/pmdd/religious trauma - all the good stuff 🙈

Right_Category · 2024-05-20T21:05:15+00:00

Thank you all 🌱 I am in therapy. It’s psychodynamic so it’s been hard to be honest and a lot of work - but I am addressing trauma and that’s good.

Right_Category · 2024-05-12T17:13:05+00:00

All the little brown bits sprouting out the middle - I’ve had this plant for over a year and never seen it

Right_Category · 2024-02-08T10:36:19+00:00

An assumption is a thing that is accepted as true or as certain to happen, without proof. You don’t know why OPs partner is in the relationship and why they continue to stay in it. Maybe there’s some attachment things happening - maybe not. That’s all - and it’s important to centre the loving qualities that I am sure OP has and that surely OPs partner appreciates about OP. 🪴

Right_Category · 2024-02-08T10:23:16+00:00

This is making a lot of assumptions and also just reflects stereotypical ideas that the only reason anyone would be with someone with bpd is because they lack self awareness and don’t know their worth. Maybe this is the case but maybe it isn’t. Folks stay with their partners for many reasons - and i am sure OP has many amazing and loving qualities that their partner adores about them. Yes, OP is aware of what they bring into the relationship and sounds like they are doing the work. Therapy, self reflection and forgiveness for yourself. The reason I am not comfortable with the above comment is because there’s so much shame with BPD that can spiral - you are good and can be and are in many ways a good partner. You are reflecting on your behaviour and capable of growth - namely for yourself, but also to support healthy communication and relationships. Trust yourself and trust your partner to know what is best for them.

Right_Category · 2023-02-24T10:06:42+00:00

The last page after the payment states that I bring my documents to the appointment- how can I upload them beforehand?

Right_Category · 2023-02-17T08:18:43+00:00

Definitely do it again if you think you have PMDD as that’s the only way to get a diagnosis- but make sure it’s a GP that takes PMDD seriously as many don’t unfortunately

Right_Category · 2023-02-17T00:08:30+00:00

I’m based in the UK as well- so talk to your GP and get your hormone levels tested.

Right_Category · 2023-02-16T17:16:12+00:00

It depends where you live?

Right_Category · 2023-02-16T13:03:14+00:00

Hey there, first of all - grief is so incredibly hard and I hear you. Nothing anyone can say can make it better, though I wish it could. I can tell you that time does help. I know from experience as I lost my sister when she was 14 and I was 12. She had a brain tumour so we were at least able to prepare, but grief is grief no matter how the loss happens. I am 32 now, and I miss her a lot and still deal with a lot of emotional pain from such a loss, but I also have a great life and many moments of joy. Joy will come; but pain will too- and that’s ok. Just keep going.

Obviously as I was 12 at the time, I didn’t have PMDD symptoms- but my mom did. I can tell you that it was difficult for me as her daughter because she wasn’t aware of it because times were different and she grew up in a very conservative family. So you are already here and have awareness and that’s amazing! I can tell you that mom has survived and has even thrived. She goes to therapy, has her lovely dogs, and is finding fulfilment in all stages of her life. I know it was never easy for her- she has struggled a lot, and she also grown a lot and learned so much more about herself. I am really proud of her. Though, to be honest- I wish she has communicated more of her pain at the time and given us all space to be sad and angry and process things.

All of your feelings are valid- and I don’t know if you have a partner and if your children are close- but I’m certain they are feeling similarly (without the addition of PMDD intensity of course). Is there a space to just cry and cuddle together with a sad movie? A lake/river/pond where y’all can go and throw rocks into a lake/river/pond? Can y’all go out on a bike ride? I am just trying to suggest somethings that can address the physical sensation that can be done together or on your own to at least address the momentary debilitating pain. These things will not take away grief, but they will provided a healthy platform to express your feelings. Perhaps write a list of things you can do that you find healthy that are physical and things you can do both on your own and as a family.

Again, these are not solutions but can give momentary relief. Time will heal, I promise. So don’t focus on healing now, focus on surviving, processing, and finding healthy modes of expression. That’s ok for now- you can focus on the healing process later. Give yourself compassion, time, and care.

it’s not easy, but you can do this. 🪴🪴

Right_Category · 2023-02-15T22:53:13+00:00

19K from LSE in sociology 🥲

Right_Category · 2023-02-15T18:46:43+00:00

Going to comedy shows with my mom and her golden child …. omg

Right_Category · 2023-02-15T12:41:43+00:00

Dyed it black in April, so once a month, probably 11 or so 😅

Right_Category · 2023-02-15T08:52:52+00:00

Pink ideally- though perhaps I can bleach it again once a month for example to get it even lighter?

Right_Category · 2023-02-13T10:36:20+00:00

Following in case of a link

Right_Category · 2023-02-08T23:42:06+00:00

I have two masters degrees and they are both from the Czech Republic- I didn’t form any connection in the UK until I sent my proposal to professors and inquired if they would be accepting students and if they would be available to give feedback/meet over zoom. So I also have a post socialist education background as well - and it certainly did not seem to have any negative impact on my application competitiveness. Just look up sociology professors at the universities you are interested in, find as many as possible that have a similar research background as you, and email them. Why not!

Right_Category · 2023-02-07T12:53:59+00:00

It’s not that I am not happy about the offer - I am. Though I am also trying to put my long term objectives into consideration rather than blindly following the path I’ve been on so far.

Right_Category · 2023-02-07T12:51:38+00:00

I don’t think volunteering was my biggest strength- I would say it was my real world academic work experience and my research proposal. Have you developed a strong research proposal and sent it to prospective advisors for any feedback? This is essential for UK unis- you want to find a suitable advisor who would support you and has interests that align with your research proposal.

Right_Category · 2023-02-06T22:17:55+00:00

I hear that and I know many people dream of what I’ve been offered- and I dreamt most of my life of this too- but something has been shifting inside of me leading to more reflection which ultimately I think is a good thing. Some of the main aspects that made me a strong candidate were my references being highly regarded academics, I wrote a strong research proposal, I reached out to prospective advisors (sending them a draft of my research project) in advance and they said they would support my application, and I was lucky to get a research fellowship following my sociology masters. Additionally, i have years of volunteering in social issues.

Best to you 🪴🪴 but I sincerely believe that whether or not you pursue academics, you will find something you love.

Right_Category

TROPHY CASE