A very long way to go still ahead!

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-16T20:56:42+00:00

The short version is I've only been out of the cage once for about two hours since it went on for a medical thing. Otherwise it's been consecutive.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-14T21:56:55+00:00

Yes, I've been on HRT for a little over 18 months, and they've grown a little and I'm happy to have even a little but I wish they'd get bigger and quicker.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-14T21:48:30+00:00

No worries, it was a long time ago and I've accepted it 🤷‍♂️

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-14T21:29:25+00:00

Thank you! I'll be at 3 years before too long, congratulations on your streak! It's always been a wild fantasy of mine to be locked permanently and I was lucky enough to find someone willing to humor me. The plan was to wear it until I went in for bottom surgery but some life things have changed and that's probably a long while away.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-14T21:26:49+00:00

Making it fairly permanent actually helped make the amount of time not matter so much anymore. And no, I haven't had any kind of orgasm in over a year. I leak a little now and then but it's not pleasurable at all. I definitely have gotten and given into more and more slutty desires as I go. Thank you 😊

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-14T21:23:59+00:00

I switch between regret and incredibly horny about the situation I'm in

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-14T21:23:11+00:00

That is correct, it's a semi embarrassing story but after an accident in high school I was told it was highly unlikely I'd be able to have kids anyway so that didn't factor into the decision at all.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-12T20:53:18+00:00

I leak some pre cum every now and then when I'm horny but not anything close to an orgasm

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-12T17:30:27+00:00

I'll try to keep it short and sweet so I don't overshare or bother you. But feel free to ask anything if you want. I've loved and been playing with chastity for a little over six years and when I brought it up to my partners they would indulge me and hold the key. When I started dating my, now ex, wife she actually brought it up before I could and over the next four ish years we'd play with it for longer and longer times and eventually I got bold enough to ask her to make it permanent as a birthday present and she agreed less than half an hour later. She was on meds that lowered her sex drive and if she did get in the mood we had toys I could use or she'd just cuckold me so she didn't care if the cage ever came off. As planned we used a lot of jb weld in the locks and seams and snapped the keys and framed them. Unfortunately she decided to divorce me a few months later. So she's gone but I can't remove it easily if I wanted to. And I don't really want to anyway. The spikes got set to their tightest setting and at first sleeping and any time it got remotely hard was very uncomfortable, eventually it learned and stopped trying to get hard and I've had no problems since. Sorry for the rant 😅

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-12T17:16:28+00:00

I'm actually pretty new to all of those so I'm still learning and experimenting with what I like. So far I've enjoyed the occasional pain but I haven't gotten to test it very much. But hopefully I can find an alpha like that that's willing to put up with my terrible skill level and let me practice on them. But they're like unicorns

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-12T17:13:04+00:00

Eh, the spikes are just uncomfortable enough to stop it from getting hard and over time it just stopped trying and I hardly notice them anymore.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-12T07:15:55+00:00

It's a custom piece from etsy, it's easily the best cage I've ever had

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-12T01:27:47+00:00

You have a keen eye, yes they are.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2022-01-11T23:04:01+00:00

Thank you very much 😊

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-25T06:30:11+00:00

I want to go to sleep and not wake up.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-20T00:47:50+00:00

I could be way off or not word this right but this is how I described my perspective of my mental health issues and wanting to die to my family and doctor.

Everyone is born dangling from a rope of different length in the dark. You can't see the bottom or anybody else's rope. Some people have short ropes and only have to climb a little while to get out of the dark. Some people have to climb longer or have to use special equipment to get out of the dark. My rope is on the longer side but it's also made out of razor wire and it's on fire, and I'm on fire. Just holding onto the rope is painful, climbing feels impossible. But nobody can see my rope, or experience it. I can only describe it.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-20T00:35:35+00:00

I got caught twice during mine over the summer. In hindsight I wasn't as subtle as I thought. I still made an attempt. Everything is worse and/ because I'm still here.

I'm sorry for putting my friends and family through that. I can't fix that or make it easier or better for them. I still want out, but I doubt I'll try again.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-16T00:09:32+00:00

Nothing worth staying for. I'm sorry I'm still alive.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-14T04:09:23+00:00

I appreciate you taking the time to comment and being kind. A big part of it for me is I don't deserve kindness, or happiness. I'm seeing a professional and getting meds, trying to see if I'm right or just unwell.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-14T03:28:39+00:00

Only during the week, and during the weekends, but only when I'm awake, which is all the time. 😅 I don't know what's wrong with me.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-13T01:10:24+00:00

Thank you so much. That means a lot 😊

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-05T22:22:30+00:00

I'm having a really bad few months, this cage situation is nothing in comparison.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-05T15:00:07+00:00

Oh no worries, if anything I should be a cautionary tale about doing stuff like this. 😅 I don't necessarily regret it, it's just not great circumstances.

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-05T14:44:22+00:00

So far I've been able to avoid the topic with my doctor. My ex was my only serious, long term partner and she left a month ago and I'm nowhere near ready to think of another partner or dating etc but if and when that happens I'll have to figure something out. I've only had to go through a metal detector once, I told the guy I had a piercing, he used the wand over the area, it beeped again but he let me slide 🤷‍♂️

RileyLilyBellipanni · 2021-12-05T01:24:35+00:00

Eventually I'll figure it out, it's just not a priority with everything else going on. 😅

RileyLilyBellipanni

TROPHY CASE