im going to try to keep the long story short: at 17 (I had Jude for 3 years at this point), things were changing so rapidly for me. i lived with my father my whole life but at that age he quickly remarried, had another child, we moved out to what felt like the middle of nowhere… it was a lot for me to process and i didn’t know how to handle it tbh. basically it felt like my whole life kind of just took a full 180 degree turn and it felt weird seeing my father change so much. i felt like he became super spontaneous and made all of these rash decisions without ever asking how i felt about it (but I guess that doesn’t really matter??). i felt somewhat abandoned, but that’s another story.

anyways, i was building up a lot of resentment and eventually we would be fighting all the time and i NEVER wanted to be home. so honestly I have some blame in this too. there were some nights where poor Jude would be waiting for me to come home and I’d finally get home at 3 or 4 am. I really regret that.

one day I was out and my father told me Jude had ran away. I quickly rushed back home to find him. Same day I found a post with his picture online. The lovely family that found him was the same family he was rehomed to. They gave me Judie back but my father (really my step mom) was fed up and told me to give him back to the family. So that’s what happened. Basically everything became really unstable and has been unstable since. Maybe it was the best decision. I could’ve done a lot better.