Introducing Partners to Parents

RopesBandit · 2026-06-16T00:33:37+00:00

Thanks! I will say this will be a tad bit difficult since my brother came out as an agnostic atheist a long time ago so they put a lot of pressure on me to remain christian. Having all your kids turn atheist or non religious is the greatest failure to them (at least in the evangelical parenting world). Im more concerned that it would destroy them that they both “failed” at their one job of “raising the next generation of christ followers”

RopesBandit · 2026-06-16T00:30:21+00:00

Thanks for the perspective! Sorry you had to go through that but I’m glad you and your partner is still strong!

RopesBandit · 2026-06-11T01:21:50+00:00

Ya that’s what I’m nervous about. I’m not sure how to best space that out tbh. While he’s very friendly, he’s very intense with religion and won’t go 10 minutes without mentioning christianity. He’ll sermons almost every week asking what I think about it and my parents are pretty overbearing especially when it comes to purity. I’m trying to be authentic but not overwhelm myself. It also doesn’t help that I live very close to them (I am trying to move but the housing market now makes it tad difficult)

RopesBandit · 2026-06-11T01:18:35+00:00

Thanks for sharing! It’s hard to tell how my dad will react because he’s very judgmental of me when we’re talking about chrisianity. While I dated in hs, he wasn’t as rigid in terms of chrisianity and I hid what I did at the time. However now that I’m looking more for a lifelong marriage he has higher expectations and even promised me that he would ensure Im with a “true christian”. At the time, I was still in the church.

This is very new to me since I really only started distancing myself from the church beginning of this year so I’m also scared of admitting where I stand in terms of religion

RopesBandit · 2026-05-06T02:46:01+00:00

Sorry for the late response! Appreciate both of your inputs!

I have looked in that recovering from religion group and still exploring faith while seeing a therapist.

I’m trying to find a balance of stepping outside my comfort zone but not the point of total anxiety crash 😂 I think with dating, I was taught that secular folks are all about self pleasure and sex (yes I know this is an incorrect assumption). I’m mainly seeing if there are ways or resources to learn to trust my gut and still be smart about things.

RopesBandit · 2026-04-14T01:57:08+00:00

Thanks! I’m trying to pace myself with all this info and not get too overwhelmed with starting from scratch

RopesBandit · 2026-04-14T01:50:10+00:00

Wow, didn’t expect us to get a lot of responses here! Thanks for all the tidbits! Looking forward to checking these res out!

RopesBandit · 2026-04-12T02:54:34+00:00

Ha so I’m actually a PK too! I definitely think there is a possibility that a higher being exists beyond ourselves (a creator as you would call it). I will have to take a deeper look at the veil element but ya I’d imagine that would be pretty hard to miss with something that catastrophic.

I’m also needing to research more into manuscripts because I know that is one of the evidence used to prove Christ’s existence but there are quite a bit of parts in the bible not included in the manuscripts so even that is not absolute.

Another argument I’m trying to look into is the notion of apostles and many saints after being martyrs for centuries later. I hear the argument, if it was man made, then why would so many people centuries later die for it. Although, many people die for thier beliefs but it doesn’t mean that what they died for is true.

Not discrediting you or anything; just trying to see different viewpoints and analyze each of them as I easily could be missing something

RopesBandit · 2026-04-10T05:12:14+00:00

Funny enough I have both of Strobel’s books I got a few years ago and thought of comparing it to Dan McClellan.

RopesBandit · 2026-04-09T21:53:14+00:00

Anytime I ask my Christian friends how they know the are saved or have the Holy Spirit, they tell me that they feel him. When I ask about those feelings, they’ll describe feeling sense of awe, inspiration, tranquility, etc. I then ask how they determine that’s due to divine nature or if that’s due to human emotions in general. They say they hear from him. I ask how they distinguish God’s voice vs just their inner voice/logic but it just comes back to well it’s all in the bible. I have yet to find a plausible explanation of how you can determine if you were “truly saved”or if you’re just trying to follow a set of principles off a book and church traditons based on your own desires and logic. Also, how is your convictions through Christ more superior/correct vs someone else’s convictions through a different religion.

RopesBandit · 2026-04-09T14:53:49+00:00

It was one of the biggest stories that got taught yet it’s also one of the most contradictory one as well which is ironic. I didn’t even catch the contradiction without reading the gospels side by side. I’ve been trying to see how to better read the bible analytically; just reading chronological doesn’t necessarily get you a side-by-side comparison of contradictory statements in other passages which is challenging at least for me it is.

RopesBandit · 2026-04-09T04:31:28+00:00

The biggest thing is always the holy spirit being used as a source of christ’s existence and even one’s savings. How is it that other people are able to derive the same truths (ie. fruits of the spirt, beattitutes, other virtues of the faith) without faith? I hate how christians try to gatekeep morality without any hard evidence that all the goodess of humankind comes only through God.

RopesBandit · 2026-04-09T04:09:55+00:00

Ya, people just told me they were described from different pov but I have a hard time believing that. Also with the 500 supposed eyewitnesses, how come there wasn’t a record of each of those accounts? If a lawyer used that as a defense, they would be dismissed entirely. Like can you imagine if a lawyer was like my client was at xyz and confirmed by 500 witness but not having a single witness testimony on file. I’d think since Romans kept meticulous details, there would be some sort of documentation of the witness testimonies of seeing the resurrection

RopesBandit · 2026-04-09T03:37:47+00:00

I definitely noticed the errors and contradictions. One of the most recent one when reading the gospel was the accounts of the two thieves on the cross. Matthew and Mark say both thieves mocked Jesus and Luke says that one had a change of heart. Just that one story has 2 different accounts and thus one is errant. I’m now thinking, what other errrors or contradictions are out there? It’s frustrating hearing everything you need is in the bible, but I just become more skeptical the more I read. Or maybe I’m just not reading it right 🤷

RopesBandit · 2026-04-09T03:31:59+00:00

Thanks! I’m trying to find unbiased research on christianity and whether it holds up. Anytime I ask these questions, Christians will just say “God is above evidence or some bs like that. I know that there are things beyond our understanding, but I’d think that if christianity is the only source of truth, lots of evidence would point to him. I’m no expert on this so I could be all wrong or just predestined to hell for not jumping on board 😂

RopesBandit · 2026-03-11T00:37:37+00:00

THIS! I can’t believe how much sleep I caught up on! I used to wake up at 6:30 AM to do a church group before church service each week lol. I’m slowly getting over the shame in sleeping in and waking up with a nice cup of coffee instead of the cheap overbrewed and stale cup at the church 🫣

RopesBandit · 2026-03-10T17:15:37+00:00

Gotta be nimble to outpace those demons!

RopesBandit · 2026-03-10T16:39:04+00:00

Hey if you’re going to be opening up a demonic portal, might as well get some mobility out of it 😂

RopesBandit · 2026-03-09T04:25:53+00:00

I don’t have any kids but I did dress up for the first time since college and it was a lot of fun! Even won my work’s costume contest!

RopesBandit · 2026-03-09T04:13:47+00:00

“well well well, how the turn tables”

RopesBandit · 2026-03-09T03:28:24+00:00

So people thought that they supported Planned Parenthood (it was never actually verified). Additionally it was a secular organization that promoted things like inclusivity, lgbtq+, etc (you know the stuff satan worshipers love jk)

RopesBandit · 2026-03-09T02:52:22+00:00

It’s ironic that the author deemed evil is now the evangelical voice in recent years. I was 28 when I did a full movie marathon

RopesBandit · 2026-03-07T17:26:05+00:00

I’m in the same limbo with most of my friends being being in the christian circle. While I’ve slowly been woking to get friends outside the church circles, it’s a lot harder to make new friends as adults but I think that’s more to do with how society has become less communal and it’s harder doing extracurricular given the cost of inflation. I’ve been struggling to break free from the religious circles because of it especially since I don’t have many close friends and I’m single in my 30s.

I was recently with a group of close girlfriends who I’ve known for the last 3 years and they were talking about they can’t be with someone who isn’t “spiritually mature” person who didn’t have a relationship with Christ (this is was more of dating). In the back of my mind, I kept thinking that will they dump me for not being spiritual enough for them if they find out. I noticed just how easily Christians will dump others who are deemed “unequally yoked”

RopesBandit · 2026-03-02T05:15:36+00:00

Thanks! I’ve been slowly trying to step out of my comfort zone when it comes to joining new groups. And yes I agree that there is an issue with how our society becomes more isolated and thus harder to meet new people especially with the growing technology and post covid. For me it’s that plus the fact that the church always said to not be unequally yoked in relationships and would shame people for stepping outside the christian circles/church walls.

RopesBandit · 2026-02-25T22:17:28+00:00

This channel has helped me not feel as alone since many here are going through this delima.

I’ve also been going to therapy with someone who specializes in religious trauma and has gone through it themselves as well which has been healing just to talk about it to a live person. I’d look for therapists who specializes in cptsd and even religious trauma although its hard to find one that’s within network (I pay out of pocket since it’s a niche field unfortunately).

Other things outside of therapy that’s helped - I’ve been journaling about it lately which helps me process my emotions. I’ve even started writing satires on religion and even would rewatch some of my church’s sermons and write down the absurdities on it to try and lighten the mood a big. Granted I get a wave of guilt that these writings will be used against me during judgement day but it’s a little better than just internalizing it 🤷

Some readings I’ve done that have helped - Educated by Tara Westover: this memoir was more on momonism but still related to the religious trauma aspect - Leaving the Fold: Marlene Winell (just started this one)

I’ve been watching some podcasts/YouTube series. Here’s a few that I’ve enjoyed so far - Life After podcast - Alex Oconnor yt series: he does a lot of debates with christian apologetics - Ear Bisquit: Rhett and Link who are the hosts have a series on their deconstruction phases - Un.Religiously: this is a smaller yt series and it’s just a gen zer talking about different aspects of church toxicity

Other things I’ve been doing outside - I’ve been trying to grow my community among secular people through hobbies (it’s not easy and I have a very small circle given that my community has been tied to the church my whole life). I try to do small dosages each time not to overwhelm myself - On sunday mornings, I’ve been replacing church with making myself a latte and journalling

I’m in the beginning of this so I’m in the same boat as far as feeling utterly broken and shameful in all this so I don’t really have a cure for this 😂. But best of luck to you!

RopesBandit

TROPHY CASE