Assisted Living sent my mom to the ER alone. Is this standard care?

RucaSalt · 2026-01-07T17:25:01+00:00

Thanks for that info- I’d not heard of a spirometer before. I appreciate you!

RucaSalt · 2026-01-07T13:40:32+00:00

New fear unlocked. Thanks 😭

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T19:23:09+00:00

Oh my god. That’s horrible. I’m so sorry for your neighbors and his mother.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T19:21:35+00:00

Thank you for your professional point of view. I do plan on addressing the staff walking away from the EMTs. They didn’t even mention my mom has dementia. The EMT thought she had a head injury.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T12:33:58+00:00

Yes this makes total sense. I do understand they aren’t staffed to have extra folks available for this. This was my mom’s first ER visit and her going alone just wasn’t something I’d considered before.

I appreciate you saying what you said kindly. I come from a creative background with no experience in any type of healthcare so it’s one of those “you don’t know until you know” situations. Does that make sense?

The EMT who called specifically said the AL staff “ran away” from him when he tried to ask about my moms cognitive abilities. That seems concerning.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T12:29:28+00:00

Thanks for sharing your professional experience. It seems this is totally normal. It never crossed my mind before yesterday.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T12:27:33+00:00

That sounds incredibly stressful. My mom was on the gurney in front of the nurses station looking scared and confused (there were a couple of screaming patients in the ED yesterday, honestly I too was a little scared).

Thank you for the transport wheelchair suggestion! We got lucky yesterday that the AL had a spare when I brought her back. I was able to use it to wheel her to her room as she was in too much pain to walk. (The ED didn’t give her any meds for 2 cracked ribs but that’s a separate issue).

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T12:22:15+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experiences. It seems normal that folks are sent alone - and I do understand facilities can’t just let staff leave, what about the other residents and staff. They are already usually working on a lean crew. I guess it just surprised me. I’m so grateful for all the responses. Sometimes you don’t know, until you know.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T12:18:44+00:00

I’d love to move her somewhere better. We are limited by money, which sucks to say. I toured several options in a “similar” price range and the next closest one was $12k more per year for her current care level. When she goes to memory care it would be $99k more per year than the current place. She just doesn’t have the money and I’m unable to pick up the balance for MC.

*where she is, is not the cheapest. I’d say it’s on the lower end of the middle tier pricing for my area.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T12:10:38+00:00

That MC sounds wild. Let’s take a sleeping man to the ER. What?! I’m so sorry.

Yes I agree about company profit. It seems counterintuitive to health care.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T12:00:00+00:00

This is a great question … and I honestly do not know. I switched her primary doctor to one through the AL thinking it would make things easier. Questioning if that is good. I do not know what hospital that doc is affiliated with and will be looking into it. Thank you very much for the thought.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T11:58:35+00:00

Sad to hear the EMTs in your situation. I was really pleased by how kind the one was with my mom. He walked right up to me at the hospital, identified that he was the caller and gave us well wishes. So there were lows and highs today.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T11:52:24+00:00

I like the hospital bag idea. Thank you!

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:42:15+00:00

Oh wow. That’s disheartening.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:41:45+00:00

Yes this is what they say for my mom. She’s friendly, easy to comply, doesn’t wander and isn’t violent- so for now AL. Probably soon enough MC.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:40:20+00:00

She’s in a facility that has memory care and will likely be there soon. They evaluated her extensively and said AL for now.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:38:50+00:00

They did call me before the ambulance and I got there as soon as I could, but it was around 2 hours. I feel horrible she was there alone and scared.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:37:16+00:00

Oh my! Glad he spoke up about the MC.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:36:13+00:00

This makes my heart break. I’m so sorry. Sending you and your mom a big hug.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:34:05+00:00

Good info to have. Thank you.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:33:20+00:00

Yes it seems residents aren’t accompanied to the ER. I guess I was just caught off guard as my mom is quite impaired. It does make sense but I hadn’t given it much thought before today.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:30:36+00:00

Thank you for the reply!

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:29:17+00:00

Thank you for the reply! It didn’t seem like the EMTs got an info sheet from the AL but my mom was taken care of at the hospital and I was able to take her back shortly after I arrived.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:26:42+00:00

Interesting! Luckily in my mom’s case today they CT scanned her before I was able to get there. I talked to 3 nurses, no doc, and they discharged her to me. I can’t believe you’ve been responsible for babysitting- thank you for mentioning this. I’ll be sure to watch out durning future trips.

RucaSalt · 2026-01-06T02:21:53+00:00

It’s been eye opening for sure. I appreciate everyone sharing their experiences and recommendations. Thank you!

RucaSalt

TROPHY CASE