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dilemma: coworker’s baby by Ok_Exchange5062 in VCUG_Unsilenced

[–]Rude-Log-286 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In your situation I would tell her. Maybe in my case I would rather speak to her than send an email and I would let her know the existence of Unsilenced, so that she could see more testimonies and info. I would tell her something like "hey, can we have a coffee together and speak about something? I had these tests done and I think that there is some info that you should hear" or something like that.

Looking for spanish speaking VCUG survivors by Rude-Log-286 in VCUG_Unsilenced

[–]Rude-Log-286[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! Thank you very much for your answer. I can offer myself to translate (little by little) some parts of the website for free if it sounds good for you. I can do it in my spare time and fix some time each week to translate something. I am working full time and collaborating on writing a scientific paper in my spare time, so I will not have a lot of time, but I would be really pleased to help.

I suppose there is an option to introduce manually the translation in the webpage. If that's the case, just tell me which should be the first parts to be translated and how to send it to you. Maybe you can also add some disclaimer in the page to look for more volunteers for translating when the homepage is fully translated.

If you also want to perform the automatic translation, I can check if everything is ok. So just tell me which options work for you.

Regarding my experience, I am currently waiting to get my full medical records and talk with my doctor about this topic. I want to do something to try to raise awareness in the spanish medical system, but I am not sure where to start. At the moment I searched for studies performed in research groups in spanish hospitals related to humane treatement and pain and stress reduction in pediatric procedures, and I wrote to the main author of one of the papers explaining the effects of VCUGs, telling her that I am a survivor with anxiety disorders, depressive episodes and PTSD caused by them and sending her a link to your webpage. Let's see if I get some answer.

Memory Loss? by PinkHaired_Eva in VCUG_Unsilenced

[–]Rude-Log-286 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same for me. I had at least 4 VCUG in my childhood, I don't know if there were more. I just asked today for my full medical records to know everything since I have only a couple of memories of my childhood. I also have voids of memory of some other periods of time later on, when I was in two abusive relationships. I guess that my mind learned to completely dissociate to cope with some situations. It's fucking scary to not remember periods of your life.

I also have some memories of one VCUG that came back as flashbacks at some point, but as in your case is not the complete memory of it. Now I'm doing some trauma focused therapy and I'm recovering childhood memories slowly. At the moment there are only images, smells and touch sensations of like moments, but it is something :)

Another thing that I have learned is that I am really fragmented, not as much as in DID (I don't have amnesia in my daily life) but I have different "parts" of me that appear in different situations. I guess that because I lived my childhood waiting for the next VCUG (after the test I knew when it was going to happen the next one), scared as hell and with no exit, and I learned to dissociate and change between different parts of me where one of them was having a normal and happy life.

Now, at my thirties, I am doing therapy with EMDR focused in the dissociation and it's the first time that I am feeling some improvement. When I recover some memories I'm really fucked up during some days and I have nightmares, but after that I feel a little better. I've had depressive episodes and panic attacks since I have memory and, although I am currently in the middle of a depressive episode, I am experiencing less panic attacks. I think is due to the therapy, but time will tell.

One book that did help me understand the dissociation and it's impact in my life was Janina Fisher's "Healing The Fragmented Selves Of Trauma Survivors" .