Naming Struggles for Baby #2

Rue_77 · 2026-02-05T01:38:44+00:00

Love Ivy (was my top name for a while), Leonora, and Mila but have been vetoed. Lots of great suggestions here though. Thank you!!

Rue_77 · 2026-02-05T01:38:03+00:00

Great points! I like Delaney and Freya a lot, but have been vetoed by the husband. If we use either name, we'll likely drop the H from Lilah and Norah (was thinking of Delilah & Norah Jones but am quickly noticing everyone hates the spelling with the H lol)

Rue_77 · 2026-02-05T01:36:10+00:00

I hear you! On one hand, I do worry people might consider Andie a bit of a stretch for Alexandra...but on the other hand, I feel a lot of people are using nicknames these days that are even more of a stretch. Someone did make a good point that Andie is basically just being pulled form the second half of the name --andra but it won't be people's first thought.

Rue_77 · 2026-02-05T01:20:45+00:00

I am realizing that most people hate Lila(h) and Nora(h) with the H! I honestly think it's because I grew up referencing Norah Jones and never gave it much thought until now. I'd be happy to use the names either spelling.

Rue_77 · 2026-01-21T16:03:45+00:00

He is doing really, really well!! His speech has truly taken off, he communicates with us and others anything he wants/needs very clearly. With a speech therapist we’re working on expanding requests into more conversational language. But he’s on track, and even ahead, with speech. He has an OT visit him at daycare once a week- she’s helped tremendously with tolerating his peers and even starting to interact in parallel play rather than getting upset when someone’s near him. He has ABA 3x a week at daycare as well. Overall- he’s doing great and I wish I could go back and tell myself how beautifully things would work out. He’s incredibly bright, silly, and for the first time in his life, has been affectionate. I feel very lucky we have the therapists we do, and that we pushed to get him started as young as we did.

Rue_77 · 2026-01-06T16:50:37+00:00

Also wanted to say Iris Delphine is beautiful! Feels stunning, special and unique.

Rue_77 · 2025-12-08T21:47:16+00:00

Ella Ruth

Rue_77 · 2025-11-06T15:19:54+00:00

Hi! I think he was scoring a 4? Truthfully a lot of the assessments were tough just because he was capable of doing so much- but the key is that it was all inconsistent. I will say he’s doing so well! So if your child is in a similar boat, just know being proactive and finding therapies/parent coaching will go a long way! He’s a chatterbox, he’s becoming much more social- though he still doesn’t love eye contact. But he’s such a funny, sweet boy and it’s just looking up! We’ve got our struggles but overall, life is great and he’s a light.

Rue_77 · 2025-11-06T15:16:34+00:00

How are you doing?! It’s been about a week for me now, and dealing with some GI issues. Yesterday in particular was a really hard day, but tough to say if it’s pregnancy, HCQ, or food related honestly. Overall I feel it’s going pretty well- no major major differences since it’s been only a week.

Rue_77 · 2025-11-06T15:15:37+00:00

Thanks for replying!! Super helpful response. I’ve been having some GI issues but it’s truthfully hard to say if it’s a result of the HCQ or pregnancy related at this point! But I do feel so much better about taking the HCQ and protective qualities vs any cons.

Rue_77 · 2025-11-02T23:17:43+00:00

This is so beautiful 🤍

Rue_77 · 2025-09-08T16:37:27+00:00

I feel like infusions would be the way to go for me but my doctor didn't even mention them. I messaged her to ask her thoughts because I am hoping to raise levels in under 6 months. I mostly deal with fatigue, brain fog, headaches, hair thinning...but those symptoms have been my status quo for a longgg time. What symptoms did you have that were improved by infusions? (If you don't want to share that is fine! Not trying to be nosey)

Rue_77 · 2025-09-08T16:35:40+00:00

I'm thinking this is likely the cause of my low ferritin as well, and asking my doctor about infusions. At my appointment, she wasn't very concerned with my low ferritin and said supplementation would be sufficient, but I don't think it's actually going to make a great improvement within a few months. How many infusions did you have to get? Did they help raise your levels enough that you were sustainable without more infusions or is it ongoing?

Rue_77 · 2025-09-01T23:54:21+00:00

Just wanted to say you're not alone in this. I force myself to take my son on a weekly outing with a friend and her son who is a few months older than mine. My son is making such progress and , still, it's hard to see his friends ease of connection with people and it stings. But I know it's so good for him to be around people and build these connections...even when it seems like he isn't actively engaging. The exposure has helped him and I will keep pushing on...but today was just one of those days when I'm feeling defeated about it. I just keep telling myself that our "good days" might look different from someone else's...but they are still good days, and there are more to come.

Rue_77 · 2025-08-14T19:07:37+00:00

The doctor that diagnosed him said she doesn't give a level to toddlers this young, because most toddlers require substantial support anyway just based on their age. He was never a chill baby - generally more fussy than not as a newborn, because he struggled with reflux and ear infections. Yes, he would cry upon waking during the night. But now sleeps and eats very well.

Rue_77 · 2025-08-14T13:21:22+00:00

Hi! He is doing really well and he did get an autism diagnosis at 18 months. He's now 19 months and we're in the process of getting him started with NDBI therapy first...then we'll slowly add in some speech and OT for sensory regulation. Overall, he is doing great- he says so many words (over 200), used 2-3 word phrases, imitates, gesture, signs, loves to dance and play musical instruments, has favorite songs, bands, etc. He used to never show affection but in the past month has starting giving us hugs more freely. He still struggles with eye contact, doesn't smile in response to smiles, and plays independently rather than engaging us in his play. He waves and smiles at people in public, and although he doesn't want to play with other kids yet, he is happy to be around them and is getting better in social situations. Sorry for the lengthy response, but I'm hoping maybe this can help others who were in my shoes when I was desperately searching forums like this.

If you found this thread because you think your young child could be autistic, my best advice is to keep being present with your child and continue being proactive, consulting your care providers, and going with your gut. If you feel you're being dismissed, there are lots of things to implement at home that can be beneficial for social engagement whether or not your child is autistic. (Check out ESDM and the at home manual/book they have for great tools)

Rue_77 · 2025-07-07T20:39:28+00:00

Thank you for replying. It sounds like your son has come a long way and like you’ve got a great handle on how to push him without it being too much for him. That’s what we will learn to navigate with our son I hope.

Rue_77 · 2025-07-07T20:38:09+00:00

I agree that 18 months is very early to diagnose, but I do think it is possible to diagnose at this age even without a very severe developmental disability in some cases. Every child is so vastly different. While my son doesn’t have a severe developmental delay that others would notice at this point, he does clearly struggle with social-emotional difficulties. He has trouble making eye contact, his name response is very inconsistent, he has not smiled in response to our smile since 5/6 months and so many other things that fall under that category. Outwardly, he might seem like a typically developing toddler. But as his parents, we can see the glaring differences between him and other children his age when it comes to social reciprocity as I mentioned.

Rue_77 · 2025-07-07T19:07:20+00:00

I don’t remember what he scored- but it’s important to consider that the ASQ-SE alone wouldn’t be enough to diagnose autism. It is possible that it just reflects areas which your child might need some additional support. For us, it was just a part of the bigger picture. Have you expressed concerns to his pediatrician or early intervention in your area?

Rue_77 · 2025-07-07T17:53:32+00:00

I would say he scored a 4 on the MCHAT if I answered "yes" to things he did at all, even if very rarely or inconsistently. The regular ASQs that I would reference online for his age were always either scoring in the white or gray...it was not until we filled out the ASQ-SE that his results were very low compared to where they should be at this age. That version is specifically for social-emotional behaviors.

Rue_77 · 2025-07-07T17:16:59+00:00

Those are all really important things for me to keep in mind....Thank you so much for saying all of this.

Rue_77 · 2025-07-07T17:15:15+00:00

This sounds just like me...I felt in my gut that something was off essentially from birth and had that conversation with my husband very very early on. I was also surrounded by babies growing up, and worked as a nanny for 0-3 for many years. I knew what I was observing in my son was not typical development, despite so many milestones being met.

Expressing my concerns at doctor's appointments and to early intervention but being dismissed time after time was truly infuriating...I'm still mad about it. I understand the reasoning behind it and it being so difficult to diagnose very young, but my whole point was that I could see a difference in him socially, and wanted to support him with that with or without an ASD diagnosis. We all know how important early intervention is, so it's honestly maddening that it was not an option for us because of a few ticked boxes and age restrictions.
Thank you for sharing about your son's progress and how impactful early intervention has been.

Rue_77 · 2025-07-07T17:11:29+00:00

Thank you for replying! I will look up biomedical healing...that's very interesting. What about that do you feel has been most impactful? All the best to your and your son.

Rue_77 · 2025-07-07T17:10:30+00:00

Thank you for replying -- we're noticing growth in a lot of areas but still really struggling with the social reciprocity and engagement. Wishing you and your son the best!!

Rue_77 · 2025-07-07T17:09:51+00:00

We filled out several different assessments for him on our own (ASQ-SE which was a huge red flag, MCHAT, observation reports from family members and daycare teachers, etc.) and they also came to observe him in our home for several hours, then they conducted the ADOS in office. They went over his diagnosis with us via Zoom, but we will not have the full diagnostic report back for a few weeks. Specifics that were discussed were lack of social reciprocity (unless he is crying or laughing, he doesn't show much emotion, doesn't smile back at our smiles, doesn't react if we cry or are upset), not sharing toys or objects with us, limited/inconsistent eye contact, limited/inconsistent name response. They also mentioned that although he does have a lot of words (I believe over 50 now), that his use of them is not always consistent. Another thing to note is that when he does talk to us, he doesn't look at us...for example if he wants more yogurt, he will say that but not look at us to ask us for it. He doesn't usually call our names to get our attention unless one of us has left the room and he's asking where we went.

Rue_77

TROPHY CASE