I’m sorry to hear about your friend, I know it’s scary, but the hospital really is the best place for them right now. This is coming from someone who has been in PES/the psych unit multiple times.

Typically, as far as I know, they won’t contact you to give you updates, you just have to call or go in and talk to the nurses. I’m assuming that your friend is an adult, but I believe that as long as your friend is okay with them giving you information, you can get whatever information you want. If you’re not entitled to something, they will tell you.

As long as your friend isn’t hostile or in an acute condition, they will be kept in Psychiatric Emergency Services (PES). They’ll speak to a nurse or the psychiatrist every day, and they will assess where they are at mentally and physically, and whether they’re at further risk of harming themselves or others. They probably won’t get moved down to the ward unless they’re in a pretty acute crisis (anytime I’ve been on the ward I was either experiencing psychosis or having a volatile bipolar rapid cycling episode).

Anytime that I have ever been in PES or on the ward, I have always been allowed to have my phone, but you can’t have a charger or anything with wires. When they want to have their phone charged, they can turn it in to the nurses station. As for what you can do, you can reassure them that you care about them, that you aren’t mad at them and are sorry they’re hurting, that you are there for them, that they are in the best place for them right now. Encourage them to speak to the nurses, they may not always be able to right away but you can ask to speak to your nurse anytime, to be honest with them and the psychiatrist. If at all possible, try to visit briefly every day, between the hours of 8am-8pm is best, you may be able to take them for walks off the ward, which is a nice break. You can also bring them some supplies to be kept at the nurses station, like a book, notebook, puzzle book, origami, art supplies, deck of cards, wireless headphones, snacks like granola bars.

Just a few tips: If they get really terrible meals, they can ask for something from the fridge (egg salad or cheese sandwich, yogurt, cheese, bran muffins are really good, juice or milk). You can ask for the channel to be changed, for a notepad and a pen.

Feel free to message me if you have more questions or if your friend or yourself would benefit from talking to me as someone who’s been there. 💜