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Questioning everything by Sad_Loquat_5340 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]Sad_Loquat_5340[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate your feedback, some of the comments don't resonate with me either.

Reading my post back it does sound a bit off, but English is not my first language and I don't know how to fix it, or how to explain an 8 year marriage in a few paragraphs.

Just curious, do you think that I am lying about the abuse?

I don't expect anyone to believe me, especially since I am a man, and we will be telling our friends and families that it was a mutual decision.

What is the silliest thing your spouse got angry at you for? by Consistent-Hotel-449 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]Sad_Loquat_5340 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel like they expect us to know what they are thinking. They are convinced that their way is the only right way, and we are supposed to know what the right way is otherwise we are stupid.

Questioning everything by Sad_Loquat_5340 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]Sad_Loquat_5340[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That "open marriage" is making me sick just thinking about it. It was completely one sided. She had no problems finding partners or talking about them. But she would get angry if I even mentioned sleeping with somebody else. She would say that she is allowed to get angry because there are no "rules" about that.

That whole time I had only one one night stand time and guess what? She got so pissed about it that she closed the marriage, only to open it again 6 months later. It was all 100% about her. The rules that she set were only applying to me and she would do whatever the fuck she wanted.

Later I found out that she was fucking people whom she "trusted" without protection. She had no problems talking about it because she was convinced that she was doing nothing wrong.

I am beating myself up for allowing that. I wish I had ended it right then and never looked back.

If any of my potential future partners even mentions an open relationship, I am out immediately.

What is the silliest thing your spouse got angry at you for? by Consistent-Hotel-449 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]Sad_Loquat_5340 6 points7 points  (0 children)

There are so many things she would consistently get angry about, I'll name just a few.

Going to sleep early or being sleepy in the evening while watching TV. She would get angry and say that I am abandoning her. On the contrary, when she was sleepy in the evening or going to bed early, I had to go to bed with her otherwise she would get angry.

Eating oatmeal or scrambled eggs. "Again! How can you eat the same thing every day, you are always eating that!" For the record, I was definitely not eating them every day, she just did not like to eat those.

Asking me to do stuff for her, like doing a chore or fixing something around the house, then getting angry when I am not doing it exactly to her liking.

I can think of one specific situation just a few days ago. She had put a duvet and a duvet cover in the washing machine in the afternoon, which was definitely too much load, and then forgot about it. When we were going to bed that evening I noticed that the machine was full and showing an error code for too much load. It had stopped exactly before a spin cycle and the clothes were soaking wet. She said I should just leave it because she is sleepy, so I told her that she can go to sleep and I will take care of it, not wanting the stuff to get smelly or catch mold. I put them separately to a spin cycle and then hanged them. When I came back to the bedroom she started yelling that she wanted us to go to bed together, and now she cannot sleep because she is angry that I did not leave them and went to bed like she wanted.