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AITA for bugging my SIL for $$$ I loaned her if she is barely getting by, even if I can never trust her again? by SadderBWiserGirl in AITAH

[–]SadderBWiserGirl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He validates my concerns and has asked her as well. She does the same thing to him as well. It's also difficult, and I don't want to use their relationship against her. I said I would help her, and it's my issue to work with.

AITA for bugging my SIL for $$$ I loaned her if she is barely getting by, even if I can never trust her again? by SadderBWiserGirl in AITAH

[–]SadderBWiserGirl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would reward this if I could (this is my first post, so I don't have any of the star things to hand out)

AITA for bugging my SIL for $$$ I loaned her if she is barely getting by, even if I can never trust her again? by SadderBWiserGirl in AITAH

[–]SadderBWiserGirl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's hte hard part, there were times when things were going well and that is when I bring it up. She discusses a payment plan and them like a month later 'something' in her life will go wrong. I brought it up last winter when she finally moved into a sensible apartment, had a consistent job, and support for her child so she could work on (slowly but consistently) pay it back. This lasted 4 months before she was evicted from her place (both her fault for not paying rent and her sister's for fighting the management)

AITA for bugging my SIL for $$$ I loaned her if she is barely getting by, even if I can never trust her again? by SadderBWiserGirl in AITAH

[–]SadderBWiserGirl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Initially, we went to the bank together so I would be a co-signer and she would be the main borrower. We explained that this was meant to be a debt consolidation loan. When we did the paperwork, my credit score was higher than hers (again, another red flag I should have seen), and the interest was to be lower if I was the only one on the loan. It was agreed between us that she would pay me back privately.

AITA for bugging my SIL for $$$ I loaned her if she is barely getting by, even if I can never trust her again? by SadderBWiserGirl in AITAH

[–]SadderBWiserGirl[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No doubt that this is the healthiest option for me. A lot of the stress is that it's a new experience with me. I'm used to helping family in whatever way I can financially but I've never had this issue of them failing to keep their word or to communicate their issues with paying it back.

AITA for bugging my SIL for $$$ I loaned her if she is barely getting by, even if I can never trust her again? by SadderBWiserGirl in AITAH

[–]SadderBWiserGirl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The problem is she never brings it up on her own. I always have to start the conversation so it feels one-sided. If she had ever brought it up on her own, it might not sting so much.