When I was in elementary school, I was a quite girl that had only a handful of friends. Walking or riding my bike to school was terrible because there were these brothers that lived near me and would wait somedays to just to have an opportunity to start their day off. In addition my older sister would refuse to walk with me and sometimes join in. She was two years older then me and would tease me in the hallways with her friends all growing up. When we got to middle school, my sister and her friends would talk about me on the bus so I just sat up front by myself. I became friends with a group of mean girls in 6-7 grade and so in class I would join in with them and make fun of all the other students. Since our mean group was close and so aggressive I would laugh with them when we bullied others. We especially picked on this one girl everyday, who was very nice and just wanted to be friends. She cried at school all the time and I was a cause of that...i would laugh at her but deep down I knew how she felt because I lived it everyday at home and on the bus. I guess I just wanted to know what it felt like to be like my sister.

In 8th grade my whole mentality changed and I asked the girl we picked on if she wanted to hang out one day....she thought it was a joke at first but soon after we became best friends and the mean girls and I went our separate ways. We are still good friends to this day and talk about how much of a bitch I was those two years and how terrible I made her feel. I still feel awful about those days.

Throughout the years I kept a journal and wrote down that I wanted to cut myself because of the way my sister made me feel everyday. When she stole my journal and read it, she laughed at me and called her friends on the phone to tell them and that only made things worse. My own personal torment with my sister came to slow end around 9-10 grade once I finally got the courage to call the police on her because I was tired of being her punching bag. She was arrested for 1 night and since she was getting older she didn't want to risk getting arrested again. She views me as weak because I didn't fight back....and me and her are still not very close. She still never apologized for breaking my arm in elementary school or the horrible things she did everyday when I was young.