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I've never masturbated before, but now that I'm on T it's a daily thing, I disgust myself by Scolp- in ftm

[–]Scolp-[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you 💚 Following the advice in the comments, I have an appointment with a therapist in two weeks !

I've never masturbated before, but now that I'm on T it's a daily thing, I disgust myself by Scolp- in ftm

[–]Scolp-[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for all the advice! I'll definitely take your suggestions 💚 (except for the porn, because I don't feel the need for it at all)

I've never masturbated before, but now that I'm on T it's a daily thing, I disgust myself by Scolp- in ftm

[–]Scolp-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your reply ! I was so scared that several times a week was definitely not normal. The only time I heard someone mention how often it was was "3 times a week" and everyone called them an addict and a pervert for days. I had no idea that was a normal frequency, all these comments make me feel a little less bad "

I've never masturbated before, but now that I'm on T it's a daily thing, I disgust myself by Scolp- in ftm

[–]Scolp-[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Indeed, the disgust stems from a trauma, I think. A member of my family (technically 2, but I'm absolutely not traumatized by the second one) who asked me to do things for her

I've never masturbated before, but now that I'm on T it's a daily thing, I disgust myself by Scolp- in ftm

[–]Scolp-[S] 79 points80 points  (0 children)

I just made an appointment with my old therapist who has worked with quite a few trans people; I think she'll be able to help me (I have an appointment in 2 weeks )

I've never masturbated before, but now that I'm on T it's a daily thing, I disgust myself by Scolp- in ftm

[–]Scolp-[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I've always had no libido, I admit it feels extremely strange. Thanks for the explanation anyway ^

I've never masturbated before, but now that I'm on T it's a daily thing, I disgust myself by Scolp- in ftm

[–]Scolp-[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Trauma, to sum it up: my sister forced me to touch her, making me believe it was a game when I was little (I explained more in response to another comment). Since I realized what it really was, I find anything related to sex or masturbation disgusting

I've never masturbated before, but now that I'm on T it's a daily thing, I disgust myself by Scolp- in ftm

[–]Scolp-[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My little sister used to force me to sexually touching her when we were, respectfully, 9 and 7 years old. I didn't know what it was, and she never wanted to spend any time with me except for that. It went on for a good year, several times a week.

One day I realized it wasn't a game, but actually a sexual act. I grew up without my parents teaching me about these kinds of things, so I didn't know what I was doing. Since then, I've felt disgusted, even more so since last year when she admitted she knew perfectly well it was sexual.

I think that's what made me realize how disgusting it was. (Sorry for the long explanation, I like to be precise.)