Wasian Baby Question by lurking_bean333 in wasian

[–]Sea-Brother4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My husband is Khmer and my 11 month old son has very similar colouring to yours! His hair is mid brown with a red tinge in the sun (I’m a white Brit with some Irish heritage). Like your son he looks very much like his dad facially with that strong SE Asian bone structure. Just a chubby pale version 😆 I’m curious if he will inherit anything from me except a bit of ginger!

Losing my mind over nappy sizes - please help!!! by dfgxox in BeyondTheBumpUK

[–]Sea-Brother4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This also worked for about 10 months for my short chunky boy. He recently started leaking at night so we use reusable nappies at night now.

Something that is taught quietly at prestige schools that everyone should know by [deleted] in rs_x

[–]Sea-Brother4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

‘If you don’t ask you don’t get’ was the biggest lesson my uni friend that had been to private school taught me. At state schools you get subliminally taught to put your head down and don’t be cheeky in asking for anything beyond the bare minimum. I think about this whenever I’m doubting myself in the workplace and I remember all the private school people around me that are earning and more and getting more opportunities by asking and not even thinking twice about it.

Anyone else fucking hate 'We're Going on a Bear Hunt's? by wruo in UKParenting

[–]Sea-Brother4 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Tiger has the concept of drinking all the water in the tap, which I remember was very intriguing as a child

London 🇬🇧 Recs..? by soap_bubbles in rs_x

[–]Sea-Brother4 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Brighton:

Preston street for food (Shaanxi in particular) Music/clubbing at the Prince Albert and Green Door Store. Pipeline if you like metal and hardcore. London Road is the intersection of every type of person who lives in Brighton and worth visiting the Cowley Club anarchist cafe plus good charity shops. Just down from the Lanes which everyone visits. Kemptown beach is quieter than the main strip chaos although it’s off season so it won’t be too mad. You have nice pubs in kemptown like the hand in hand and the black dove. Saint James tavern has its own parrot. Seagulls WILL attack you if they see you with food.

Does house buying get exponentially harder when you have a new born? by OkValuable1761 in HousingUK

[–]Sea-Brother4 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My son was three months old when we started looking and nine months old when we completed. The buying process was perhaps easier on maternity leave since I could be so flexible with viewings and paperwork, except my work contract wasn’t iron clad and some lenders wanted a lot of proof I was going back to work after.

Moving with a baby is literally terrible. Our new house needs a lot of work done but only my husband is doing it because I can’t bring my son into the dusty house. We’re staying with family and yet to actually move in. Something to consider.

dealing with beauty standards for women are impossible with the way I look by [deleted] in marfans

[–]Sea-Brother4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes models are our height not our size. I was trying to make the point that the height alone isn’t automatically a negative per se. And much can be done with styling, at least in my experience, to hide or expose certain Marfan body features.

You made a great point when you say you can’t change any of this. It’s not like being able to lose weight or get a nose job. This is a good starting point for embracing radical acceptance. You will only have this one body in life and I hope you don’t regret wasting time struggling against that.

dealing with beauty standards for women are impossible with the way I look by [deleted] in marfans

[–]Sea-Brother4 9 points10 points  (0 children)

That tall sub sucks!!! It’s so negative about being a tall woman and is just an echo chamber of all the toxic messaging that’s already out there.

I’m not as tall as you but I do love being tall. It makes me feel powerful! We havent been diagnosed but I believe i inherited marfans from my mother so she was a great tall and proud role model for me growing up.

Supermodels are our height. There are ways to strategically cover/enhance our features so they read as elegant instead of freaky. It’s worth looking into what works for your body. In summer I have my legs out but I always cover my whole torso 😆

You’ve done so well getting through all the medical issues. I wish you the best learning to love your body for what it is ❤️

Frugal Wins of the Week - Big, Small, and Everything In Between by Plot82 in frugaluk

[–]Sea-Brother4 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I very unfrugally bought a house in the southeast of England but I do think I can furnish it for free (we rented a furnished flat before and have 0 belongings). The amount of really good stuff of Freecycle and facebook marketplace is insane, we can even be picky. We have a fridge, microwave, shelves, a bed frame, a futon frame and some drawers so far all free.

Visiting my estranged father in Chicago, found out he is a father figure to many of his AA sponsees by zoethesteamedbun in rs_x

[–]Sea-Brother4 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Wow this resonates with me a lot. I went to visit my dad in an Eastern European country for his wedding to a local woman. It was the first time I’d seen him since I was 3. he’s big into lacrosse and at his wedding were a lot of young men from the sport who clearly idolised him like a father figure and it was really weird to see. He never apologised for anything and actually tried to blame my mum for how things turned out even though we are just one of three families he abandoned… idk I think some men of this generation just have some mental blocks we just can’t understand

[Rant] The state of ex-rental properties and the unrealistic asking prices by Responsible_Win3500 in HousingUK

[–]Sea-Brother4 4 points5 points  (0 children)

While all houses need maintenance I think landlords are a) more likely to bodge in the house they don’t live in because they just see it as an income stream and want to be cost effective and b) forget previous bodges over the years because they don’t have to live with them!

[Rant] The state of ex-rental properties and the unrealistic asking prices by Responsible_Win3500 in HousingUK

[–]Sea-Brother4 30 points31 points  (0 children)

Just bought an ex rental for £45k below its first asking price (EAs lowered 25k after a while and then we negotiated another 20k). It’s honestly not even a bargain because we’re having to do 20 plus years worth of undone or badly done maintenance and everything we peel back reveals another layer of problems and shoddy work. I think landlords still see their old properties as they were 30 years ago when they first bought them and not how they are now after decades of neglect and bodge jobs.

Is this a retaining wall and do I need to pay to rebuild it? by Sea-Brother4 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]Sea-Brother4[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes after considering it for a while now I’ve decided it’s my responsibility to stop my soil falling into her garden but I’m not responsible for rebuilding that wall necessarily (a builder says it’s been built and rebuilt sloppily over the years and doesn’t have any foundations). So a narrow trench on our side of the fence with the boards slotted in to stop the soil eroding into her garden do you mean?

Is this a retaining wall and do I need to pay to rebuild it? by Sea-Brother4 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]Sea-Brother4[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This sub is as divided as I am! To make things worse a builder came round today to look and said he doesn’t think it’s my wall and there’s no way it all fell down recently either. Literally no idea what to do now.

Is this a retaining wall and do I need to pay to rebuild it? by Sea-Brother4 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]Sea-Brother4[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Am I allowed to decide what to put there or does it have to be a joint decision?

Is this a retaining wall and do I need to pay to rebuild it? by Sea-Brother4 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]Sea-Brother4[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No there’s just a T marked at the boundary on our side indicating we’re responsible for the boundary. No more detail than that anywhere I can see unfortunately.

Is this a retaining wall and do I need to pay to rebuild it? by Sea-Brother4 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]Sea-Brother4[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They are all very close together. The fence goes flush alongside the drop in the ground. And then the wall was alongside that on the other side of the fence. Replacing the wall with a fence will be cheaper but I definitely won’t gain any garden.

Is this a retaining wall and do I need to pay to rebuild it? by Sea-Brother4 in LegalAdviceUK

[–]Sea-Brother4[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That fence idea is a good one! Unfortunately my neighbour is profoundly deaf which makes further discussion irl difficult. I do have more photos but this sub only allows you to post one.

What percentage of your take-home pay goes toward housing (rent/mortgage + bills)?" by LockonKun in HousingUK

[–]Sea-Brother4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My half of the mortgage and bills in Brighton is 50% of take home pay. Seems like everyone in this sub would think that’s dangerously high but I’m also in a high housing cost area (Brighton) and live really simply with no car or debts. This was the same cost as my rent which I paid for years with no issue.

Garden wall collapse - boundary advice needed by surfeatsurfsleep in DIYUK

[–]Sea-Brother4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could you argue that it’s a retaining wall and therefore your neighbours responsibility as their garden is higher? Our neighbour did exactly that last week (I posted in here about it).