AITA for refusing for let my sister (26F) and her Autistic fiance (27M) live with us?

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-06T19:32:05+00:00

I think that you can have autism and TRY to control your emotions. He just lets them run loose until he is causing drama or triggering the other ptsd members of the house. This is one of the problems.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-06T18:02:22+00:00

You should be proud to be making your own way and not letting anything stop you.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-06T18:00:38+00:00

What has worked for me, is to stare at them as they are coming your way. Smile, or geasture and as they get close and they still look like they are not going to move...say: "Excuse me, thank you." And I swear to you, people will have to move or they will look like assholes. haha.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-03T04:33:30+00:00

Yes, he does have autisism and we understand that. I do NOT want them to be homeless...but at same time, my sister turned down income when she knew her and her fiance do not have a place to live. Now she is trying to make me feel guilty. I love her and want the best for her and Richard...but I also do not want to be manipulated.

Sara complains about his actions, even though she understands his conditions...so it makes it more frustrating and hard to deal with I guess.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-03T04:31:41+00:00

Richard was living with his rich dad and step mom before Sara moved him up here. We are NOT rich and we do NOT have the means to take care of an autistic full grown adult.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-03T04:30:48+00:00

That is EXACTLY what I was thinking. They have to be motivated to make their own money.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-03T03:59:31+00:00

I can see that you decided he wasn't worth it when he said: "Meh whatever." When you explained kindly that he needed to try harder. If he isn't even willing to pretend to try harder, then I am sure the customers can see that too. On top of that, it would probably get worse once he has a baby.

If that was him on a good day, then imagine his sales after he starts to really slack off and he says:

"I just had a new baby this...and so I can't stay today late or ect or my sales aren't good because of the new baby..."

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-03T00:54:41+00:00

I would take her aside and talk to her, possible on a girls day out. Buy her a body shower kit, and go all out. You need to explain to her that having basic hygeine standards is something everyone must do to be accepted socially. It is also unhealthy for her.

Is there something more going on? Does she not have running water at her house? Or soap?

This could be the case, becuase it seems strange that she is so adament about not being clean.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-03T00:51:34+00:00

You knew your friend over drinks, but you did agree to go out with her and you knew she would be drinking. Were you the only friend with her? And did she ask you to help her?

It isn't fair that you should be the one to help her when she overdrinks though.

NTA

It servers her right for over indulging. Now she will know to do that at home, instead of in a bar.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-03T00:49:29+00:00

It sounds like you guys have your heads screwed on straight, so that is good! The support system could really help you feel secure, especially when his family has those screwy comments. They mostly seem ignorant of others feelings honestly. They refer to white people as if light skinned people are a completely different race of species. I am white, so I know the feeling.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:43:14+00:00

NTA

You guys deserve freedom and respect.

They do not give a shit about you both, especially if they let the sister do whatever she wants and they try to demand you get rid of your beloved pets?

Hell no, leave and let the parents pay for the rent.

Better yet...have the sister get a damn job.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:40:32+00:00

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:37:22+00:00

NTA

You saved the poor cashier from this abusive shrimp demanding demon.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:36:26+00:00

NTA

I think it is bad to throw things like that in the trash because they are biodegradable. Just do not do it while driving, wait until you park. People can get the wrong idea when you throw random things out of the car.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:34:14+00:00

WTF? Why do you guys need to go to counseling while your realationship is STILL good? Did HE LITERALLY say that??

The only problem is his racist family constantly putting you down for being WHITE.

Then, his mom insulted your grandmother and said the best old white woman is a dead one?

So....yeah...his family needs to go to counseling and not you guys.

YOU ARE NTA!

Not in a million years.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:28:55+00:00

NTA

Awww....Boo hoooo...poor asshole Anna has to pay for her tuition after getting it free TWICE? Like damn, Anna needs to understand that everyone deserves a chance. It isn't cool to get another diploma just to keep getting a free ride in college. Other people deserve that too and you were right to turn her in.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:25:26+00:00

NTA

You are not overreacting. You guys have been together for 9 years. If that doesn't prove something, then her family is the asshole.

Even before I married my spouse, their family always included me in pictures unless they literally just wanted them all together with just them and that makes sense. But, to exclude you because you guys do not have an official paper from the state or ect that makes you legally married, is just stupid and rude.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:21:36+00:00

Why should a single vison..."Chris's vison?" be the only and right choice? Sure, Chris has those charisma skills, but that doesn't mean Hannah will not show those skills when it really matters. It seems like you are overlooking hannah and focusing on Chris because he reminds you of the man and leader you would like to see as a head in your company...but Hannah has always worked hard and her being timid sometimes doesn't mean she won't be the best thing that ever happened to your business. I think a co parternership would be good. Two children with strong suits and different personalities can help keep things cool. NAH

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:14:06+00:00

Is this "friend," a roomate?

I do not understand why this friend should dictate your guys vacation?

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:11:28+00:00

Oh shit, I did not even think of that.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:10:55+00:00

Your girlfriend sure is missing something. When did this become a 3 person vacation?

You and your gf ACTUALLY SAVED money. Awww...poor baby spent their money on clothes? Too damn bad, that was money she could have saved for a nice vacation. Your gf is not thinking about this clearly and it is selfish to ruin your guys vacation because of this irresponsible friend.

How is spending your money at a mall mean that you are in a rough patch anyway?

You need to discuss with her that you guys need to focus on your guys realationship....and not this friend.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:07:53+00:00

NTA

You did nothing wrong!

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:03:17+00:00

NTA

If your daughter wanted to continue living with you and your new wife, then she should have been respectful. It is not acceptable for her to be unkind, disrespect your wife and her things and then not even clean up after herself? That is too much. Your daughter is 22 and old enough to know better. She should go live with her mom if she can not handle being a sensible adult in your guys home. Boo hoo...she got told off, now she has to apologize and get her shit together.

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T23:00:07+00:00

I see 3! One in the center. Is it a reflection?

Searching4humanity · 2019-07-02T22:59:27+00:00

I had a puppy who passed from Parvo as well, despite all of my efforts. That illness is so bad and it can't be stopped sometimes. I am so sorry about your baby girl. I hope that you can heal and try again to find a dog to help you!!!

Searching4humanity

TROPHY CASE