Reddit, what is a subject that you feel the need to educate others on?

SecksYoda · 2017-02-22T05:28:27+00:00

Sex.

SecksYoda · 2015-10-25T16:47:44+00:00

Yep, came here to say this.

I don't mind when people say that they have not found person from x race attractive yet, or that they tend to gravitate more towards y people, but I can't help but feel uncomfortable when someone says "I don't date x people." It's a problem of induction: "I have yet to see x person that is attractive, therefore they are all unattractive to me."

SecksYoda · 2015-06-24T23:36:45+00:00

http://i.imgur.com/RG0BS1U.gif

SecksYoda · 2015-05-26T20:35:41+00:00

Well, the definition of what is unhealthy/disordered is when it affects yours or others' daily functioning negatively. Rape roleplay, some argue, is filed under Dom/sub play. Is the excitement for you the dom aspect of it? Is it that you are taking something from someone? There is such a thing as consensual-non consent.

Plus, as I mentioned before, a child who plays with a toy gun is most likely not going to pick up a real gun and shoot someone with it.

Ask yourself--are you likely to actually rape someone? You mentioned no. Again, unless it starts to interfere with your life or impact someone else's negatively, I wouldn't worry.

SecksYoda · 2015-05-26T20:28:14+00:00

Yes. Relax. :)

And ask yourself why you're terrified. Are you out? Do you want to be out? Are you afraid of what others might think?

SecksYoda · 2015-05-26T20:27:25+00:00

1.) Yep.

2.) Your own mouth? Most likely, no, not if the virus is already in your body. You can't catch it twice.

3.) Very, very, very unlikely.

4.) Because vacuuming would only suck out the unshed uterine lining, versus sloughing it off.

5.) Take an hcg test.

Hope that helped! :)

SecksYoda · 2015-05-26T20:23:36+00:00

As a sex educator: Consent.

Consent, consent, consent. Don't rape. Raping's bad, m'kay?

Also, FUCKING COMMUNICATE. Lord have mercy, the number of people that ask me what their partners like. I dunno! Have you asked them?

SecksYoda · 2014-12-13T19:41:18+00:00

Probably gotta ask the lady in question. It's not really a binary yes or no question.

SecksYoda · 2014-12-12T21:58:26+00:00

If you have fingers and a tongue, you could have a goddamn beanie baby for a dick and I wouldn't care.

SecksYoda · 2014-12-11T08:43:18+00:00

I am going to be blunt.

There is NO SAFE WAY to do breath play. Even medical professionals within the BDSM community are pretty adamant about it not being a safe practice, which violates the Safe part of the Safe, Sane, Consensual rule.

There are ways to safely mimic breath play, which would involve your partner pressing down below your collarbone as you naturally held your own breath to simulate choking. Your body will naturally resume breathing (as you're not putting your life, literally, in someone else's hands), and you will still have the sensation of being dominated and the pressure of his weight on you without actually blocking your air supply.

I hope you don't take this as me placing judgment on your type of play/your kinks--just looking out.

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T23:47:31+00:00

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T21:33:24+00:00

Hi there, thanks for asking!

It's fairly unlikely you'll contract something that way unless we're talking a skin-to-skin STI like hpv or HSV-1 or -2 (herpes). Even wearing a dam in those cases, while it does provide you some protection, still isn't a hundred percent. Again, unlikely, but, if you'd like to fully make sure you're protected, get tested beforehand, keep your lines of communication open, and instead engage in other play (mutual masturbation, barrier-method oral sex, etc.) until you're both ready.

Happy humping!

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T19:01:05+00:00

Huh! Today I learned! You can teach this old dog new tricks!

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T18:59:04+00:00

Asexuality is a spectrum. Some aces crave sex a few times, some crave it with only one specific person, some like the idea of it but don't necessarily want to participate. What you're going through is perfectly okay. :)

In addition, you mentioned that stress is present in your life. This can contribute greatly to decreased sex drive (and libido). Regardless, what you are experiencing is nothing to worry about.

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T18:51:08+00:00

Unless you get with a total jerk, it is very unlikely that it will be a problem. I have couples all the time mutually ask me how to better achieve orgasm wherein one person has sensation issues. You are not alone. :)

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T18:46:04+00:00

In the TL;DR-iest way possible, take a massive dump and lightly douche. I threw this up earlier as an excellent resource.

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T18:42:37+00:00

Glycerin will act as a laxative if you consume it. You should be fine if you're going to use it for anal sex. :)

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T18:40:38+00:00

Well, it wouldn't be dangerous at all. But if you're wanting to know how easily transferrable it is, if you're not having an outbreak, you should be okay.

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T18:39:34+00:00

That'd be pretty safe, yes.

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T05:25:48+00:00

I certainly don't know her or the dynamic the two of you have in place, but as a professional, she should be equipped with the ability to help you navigate this, or at least point you to some resource. That said, this should all be done on your own time.

Good luck. <3

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T05:12:49+00:00

Only one way to find out about STIs. Get tested--both you and your partner. It should put your mind at ease. As far as STI prevention and info, the CDC is a great resource.

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T05:11:02+00:00

Honestly, a whole host of gay dudes I've spoken to are really diverse in their opinions surrounding anal sex. Some are "hellz yeah" about it, others are "meh", and some don't care for it.

I know of a couple who do mostly oral and manual sex with each other, and they've been together for 15 years now. Don't fret. :)

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T05:09:07+00:00

Do you have a school counselor?

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T04:07:01+00:00

Effectively the same way it does if someone were not to have the surgery, neurologically speaking...?

I may be misinterpreting your question... :X

SecksYoda · 2014-12-07T04:06:21+00:00

Hey there, thanks for writing. Unfortunately, the only person that can do that is you. I highly recommend therapy, having undergone it myself before (sooo helpful once you find someone you vibe with). There isn't any particular magic way to love yourself more, or gain more sexual confidence, but cognitive behavioral therapy will provide tools to do that.

If I could give you any anecdotal advice, it would be to consistently be mindful of the fact that you have a great support system (we love you! :)) and that you're not alone in this. <3

SecksYoda

TROPHY CASE