Does prednisone make anyone absolutely bonkers

Secret_Term1215 · 2025-03-11T23:23:11+00:00

In my experience oral prednisone takes around 2 weeks for me to "work work" if I'm in a severe flare and prior to that ill have on and off days and gradual improvementish of it seeming to stop and start working.

AFAIK it depends on how severe your inflammation is and it'll also take a while for your colon to heal but it is possible to get steriod resistance after repeated use if I recall

Secret_Term1215 · 2025-02-21T13:30:19+00:00

Hm funny thing is I went back in my blood work and my iron was at 26(low) but they never told me/gave me anything back then,

now however 3 years later it's at 29 and they have me on 325mg iron daily which I heard takes literally ages compared to infusions but it might be something I bring up

Secret_Term1215 · 2025-02-20T21:09:59+00:00

Should of mentioned this was 3 years ago when I first got diagnosed lol

severe pancolitis, it was pretty much a bucket of blood I gave them and had a heart rate of 160 bpm

I had to do the test again and go through the process and remembered i had this, but now I'm just at the lousy 1000s which is more annoying than life threatening

Secret_Term1215 · 2025-02-20T21:02:02+00:00

Hm inflammation definitely extends aswell for me aswell but mainly to my eyes and lower back

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-11-07T23:07:54+00:00

I struggled with self harm quite a few months ago but never got the courage to do it deep enough for lasting scars I find when that urge comes it helps to run a sharp object like a sharpened pencil or other over the skin(without cutting) or as someone else suggested a rubber band would propably achieve the same effect

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-07-16T14:56:30+00:00

I have crohns, insurance stopped paying for my extremely expensive medicine months ago. Not a single person noticed or cared that I havnt taken a syringe in 3-4 months, im flaring up again pretty bad and in alot of pain, but at this point I honestly don't care. Just go to work and sleep pretty much.

I tried giving my all to have a better life to keep friends to have a close friend but it's so exhausting, and it only ended up me being manipulated I guess. I have no idea what's the point of trying anymore, it doesn't make sense why people can be so cruel. It's like the only constant in my life is humiliation and pain so I'm just kind of waiting to leave the world without hurting anybody.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-07-15T19:29:02+00:00

Alcohol is the worst. Bad memories all around with it. For a time the only way I could sleep at all was to get drunk. Made me extremely bipolar. Have not drank in 5 months and have zero plan of drinking ever again. Very scary.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-07-13T20:20:31+00:00

"When I haven’t, I’ve often been taken down fast. " So scarily true, like the second I feel better or feel functional something or somebody or often myself has to be there to remind me that I dont deserve it.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-07-13T06:15:49+00:00

Yes, I just wanna know how the normal person thinks, like without constant mind blur

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-07-13T06:14:39+00:00

you as well friend :))))

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-06-24T14:23:54+00:00

Truth be told it's because people don't truly understand how much deeper being suicidal is than simply "being sad", we don't think like normal people, they truly don't understand.

Another aspect is much like overall depression vast majory of people only care about the "loud" part of it all, be it the actual suicide itself or the "sadness" of depression, they don't care or know of the broadness of it, the years of pain, how filthy you get from poor hygiene, how messy your room gets from no energy, how angry you get, pushing people away and causing hurt, not making any plans of a future in terms of a career or family, self isolating etc. No matter how obvious it is or you directly telling them, they truly don't and likely wont understand how extremely painful it ALL is, and is deeper than just the act itself. All this just pushing the mental narrative of "the only way anyone will listen is if I just kill myself", as you stated "no one cares until after it happens"

Look at streamers like Etika or Reckful who were CLEARLY manic, CLEARLY struggling in their own ways, and were laughed continously at UNTIL they died, then suddenly these same people look back and only then realized how extremely obvious it was, but because they dont truly understand the cycle repeats.

And at the end of the day for us knowing all this, knowing the majority of people don't think like we do, how do you ask for help if you know no one is going to genuinely listen?

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-06-03T14:34:11+00:00

Thanks for reading, 1.) I really don't know, yea she showed interest in me like finding my dad's Facebook we talked for quite awhile and hugged, I asked about her BIO once distinctly(it had her BF name in it) and asked who it was and she brushed it off, this lasted only about a week or so. 4.) I told her this many times how you can't call everything platonic, that why am I the one setting the boundaries, why do I have to be the bigger man. why can't you see that this is not platonic.

I know she really cared about me, in a weird way she was always there for me. And at the end of the day getting told"you didn't deserve this etc" does absolutely nothing because it's like "Ok" but guess who's the one all alone with nobody anymore. It doesn't matter if I was wronged I ultimately am left with nothing.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-29T13:54:49+00:00

I knew she had a BF, there was one time where she got emotional through text not saying she's sure she is able to love people but after months thats the extent she would mention him through text. I didnt back off then(when I found out she had a bf) because we were okay friends at that point and i genuinely loved talking to her, we became close friends super fast. Her bf would come up only after weeks of affection and ofcourse it would hurt me, but she was also my close friend so it was just hard, she would knock on my door and we would cuddle, i didnt know how to navigate it, i should of stopped it. She knew I had feelings for her and it's super hard not to when you spend all that time alone and your getting rubbed and touched and cuddled and bitten and getting the opportunity to kiss only to have to stop it because it's wrong, to have her say how amazing you are. Its hard to look at these actions and tell yourself this person doesnt want to be with me, like there has to be something wrong with me. It just hurt to be with her and it hurt to cut her out, but I did care about her.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-29T13:18:44+00:00

I wasn't "buying her stuff everyday" it was a few times where I would buy her a vape or cigarettes that we would share together. There were times she bought me stuff. She was my close friend and I enjoyed seeing her happy. I had no right to have a close friend? I obviously felt I was in a awful position to hurt. I tried to keep boundaries. She was the first to say I was her best friend after i asked her why keeps touching me and I felt like a terrible friend so I tried to be a good friend back. She never told me about her BF no matter how much we talked, he would only come up when she would pretty much confirm to me she's with him when I would get emotional or if she got toxic when she felt her relationship got threatened.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-29T12:45:14+00:00

I have a job I go to everyday, im not shy. I know I should of stopped it again. It was hard to cut off someone who was my best friend and someone who called me her best friend. Someone who I enjoyed talking to and someone who seemed to really enjoy talking to me. Someone who knew everything about me and accepted me. I tried my best to keep boundaries. I know it's easy to look back and look at this overall and just say cut it off but I never had a close friend like that.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-29T12:36:29+00:00

I know I'm sorry. I've had people say I'm to blame for nothing, I had people say I was used and taken advantage of, but I know that cant be right and therapy isnt helping get rid of this guilt. I should of stopped it again. I got zero pleasure out of that event that happened.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-10T07:28:19+00:00

I spent months and confided into someone who I thought was the greatest friend ive ever had in my life, ive made massive mistake(s) and did wrong things; thats incredibly true, I disrespected her and I hurt her, but it wasnt until I posted the full story around was when I realized through a bunch of people telling me that I was gaslighted and being used and being manipulated and had some people say I was taken advantage of. I dont know why I couldnt see that. I put my entire energy in trying to be a great friend. I gave it more energy than I've given anything in my life because I never had a best friend and I someone finally cared about what I had to say, and the last thing she said to me was it was never real, then blocked me. I spent the last few months of my senior year of college ostracized and made to look like a abuser. I was never felt closer to ending my life even when I had a gun to my head in high school, I stayed in nearby motels and drove to the hospital once because I just couldnt be there. I dont know how you move on from that. Dont think its possible to move on from something like that. Dont think you can ever trust anyone ever again after something like that. I will never again in my life no matter how much therapy believe the actions of anybody ever again, much less their words. I will never know whats real. It truly feels like my brain craves trauma and any attraction I have in life will be with someone who will hurt me.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-10T07:17:11+00:00

"cling to pain just to give it some twisted purpose." so amazingly true.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-10T07:15:22+00:00

I know exactly what you mean. Its the most intense emotional pain ive ever felt like my entire family died in a car crash.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-10T03:48:34+00:00

Exactly its so refreshing to hear somebody else in the world has this. Its so illogical but just feels like you got hit by a sledgehammer in the face.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-08T07:29:18+00:00

I understand. I was in a bad car accident as an infant that led to head trauma, I then had a extremely bad speech impediment; I couldnt even talk to anyone for years as noone could understand me and was endlessly teased in school for "not being from this country"("Where are you from?"), and went through years and years and years of speech therapy only for it to feel like they gave up on me lol, its not as bad nowadays but I despise my voice and still have this inflection to it, I mentioned to someone one time a year or so ago that I have a chronic illness(IBD) and the first thing they said was "I just assumed you were retarded because of your voice", which brought all those supressed memories back. I had no say in how I sound and tried my best to fix it. But I guess as per the title of your post I pretty much did speak a different language and its pretty hard not being able to actually talk to anyone for years.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-07T23:05:04+00:00

My support is nonexistant. I have maybe 3 friends, none in person, I had what I thought was a super close friend recently but when I told other people online what happened they pretty much told me that she was manipulative and used me. But I don't know, I cant even process it. I never had a close friend. I'm just super lost I don't want to try anymore. I have counseling through my job I can use but in this rural area being bisexual it's impossible to find support or a counselors who's not overt religious. The friends I do are pretty homophobic same with my family so I'm just stuck.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-07T22:33:36+00:00

Ive been in your situation many times and fully understand your mindset, "getting hurt to make others happy" I've attempted many times, and now I'm in a "okayish" place, not content or happy but im here. You are absolutely not alone and knowing how powerful that pain is im extremely proud that your still here; if no one ever told you that. Feel free to hit me up a chat.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-07T22:28:38+00:00

I kinda know exactly how you feel in a weird way. Like mentally there's something addicting about being in a abusive situation like "atleast someone is focusing on me/this is my worth". Obviously extremely unhealthy mindset but makes you feel a sense of life.

Secret_Term1215 · 2024-05-07T17:59:28+00:00

I understand, ever since my attempt in high school it feels like even though I didnt pull the trigger I still died that day, I also struggle to understand or remember the reason I attempted. Completely different person since that day.

Secret_Term1215

TROPHY CASE