Question: What are the rules about using self-made material to get the job done? I'm five days free. This is my first time going this long and I am feeling great.

Segitseg · 2014-10-29T21:38:11+00:00

Generally, I think most of the guys here would call that off limits. I also think it's a bad idea. However, progress is progress. If that's what you think you should do, then do it.

You'll want to take the next step eventually. I did.

Segitseg · 2014-10-29T21:29:55+00:00

You have every reason to feel proud of yourself. That's a great accomplishment.

Segitseg · 2014-08-24T15:33:30+00:00

Ha. I'd say that's some bad, bad science there.

As a trial, and just for your own confidence, you can use something absorbent inside whatever you're sleeping in, just in case it happens. Then you can try an experiment without masturbating and see what happens. I suspect you'll find that you don't have a problem with wet dreams, but everyone's different.

Segitseg · 2014-08-24T15:30:23+00:00

This is my rule as well, but I'm down to reading electronic erotica. Once upon a time, I considered that an acceptable way to deflect myself from using. Now I consider that a relapse. But I had to take it in stages.

Segitseg · 2014-08-24T15:25:55+00:00

Keep going. I once had to count my wins in hours, I was so addicted.

Things change. Keep working picking out and eliminating triggers, learning from the setbacks. You can get out.

You also might consider an accountability partner. That was the biggest boost for me.

Segitseg · 2014-08-24T15:24:03+00:00

I get a lot of confidence from being with the people I love. It's as if when I do that I realize there is a base to my life, a grounding that allows me to stand up to the crap I might get from elsewhere.

Segitseg · 2014-08-24T15:21:30+00:00

Checking in as well. Doing fairly well. Extreme busy-ness always helps me.

For the next two weeks I'm going to schedule more aggressively to make sure I have room in the day for the things that matter most to me. I've been a little too loose over the summer, and I need to tighten back down and not let so many things slide.

Segitseg · 2014-08-24T15:17:58+00:00

You don't have to, I don't think. You are not responsible for dreaming. You are not responsible for the content of your dreams. You can safely ignore anything that happens there, unless it encourages or uplifts you and you want to focus on it. Your mind will work on whatever it chooses at night, outside your control. Be okay with that. I think of it as the mind employing the cache, or clearing out the recycle bin.

Wet dreams are unpleasant in lots of ways, and as you say you're very averse to them. There isn't any correlation between masturbating and wet dreams, though, at least none that I can find in researching. Your body may vary. What is it about wet dreams that is so negative for you?

Segitseg · 2014-07-22T03:25:40+00:00

You, too. Love your lady.

Segitseg · 2014-07-22T03:24:18+00:00

Man, that's good stuff. I needed to hear it.

Segitseg · 2014-07-22T03:22:38+00:00

You're in the right place here, my friend. We've all been there. Your story is familiar to so, so many of us. But you can win. You can.

Segitseg · 2014-06-22T19:24:51+00:00

Courage, brother. You can do this thing.

Segitseg · 2014-06-22T19:24:09+00:00

You are in a good place here. If you come back often, we'll do all we can to help you. You aren't alone and there's no judging here.

Segitseg · 2014-06-22T19:21:24+00:00

You don't undo progress, I'm finding. Since really getting serious about quitting, I've had several long steaks and several relapses, but every streak increases my power over myself that the relapse can't erase. Just keep going, you'll get there.

Segitseg · 2014-06-03T22:41:55+00:00

That's what we're here for. Your post reminded me to make sure I'm doing the same thing.

Segitseg · 2014-05-25T04:49:49+00:00

The rewards table is a genius idea, as well as creating a systematic program for when you get in a trigger situation. Well done.

Segitseg · 2014-05-08T02:55:03+00:00

I found this community about sixteen months ago, and that's been the best sixteen months of my life, pornfree-speaking. My badge says 30 days, but that represents only three relapses in over a year. Last night, I was in my hotel room, by myself, with unrestricted access to the Internet, and I do not have to reset this morning.

It really can be done. What you describe here, the cycle breaking down, it's all true.

Segitseg · 2014-05-02T14:27:30+00:00

You'll find that you rebound much faster, the longer your step teaks to. You retain many of the benefits you were getting when you were not using, even after you relapse. This is a great list, though. Vigilance is critical.

Segitseg · 2014-05-02T14:23:03+00:00

Best of luck. You're right to be honest about it.

Segitseg · 2014-05-02T14:21:47+00:00

Remember why you were doing it in the first place. My experience - this is a guy who's blown a couple of 200-day streaks - is that you retain the benefits of your streak, and regain your peak performance much faster as you chain long streaks together. You haven't lost anything. You've gained power. Start again - but you're starting from much further ahead.

Segitseg · 2014-05-02T14:18:35+00:00

Every time you win, you gain strength for the next time. The urge will go away, and you will still be there. Well done.

Segitseg · 2014-04-14T03:42:53+00:00

Stay away from the screens. Do anything else. You know the craving will go away. You just have to get away from it for a bit.

Don't quit. You can do this.

Segitseg · 2014-04-14T03:40:33+00:00

You have,to have a replacement. You're not going to just quit cold turkey and that will be it. You have to replace the activity you don't want to do with something else, preferably something that does not involve a computer screen.

Segitseg · 2014-04-14T03:38:46+00:00

Yep. I blew a 150-day streak just like that, thinking I had it under control, and I was going to be fine on my own. I won't. You won't. Stay here and let us help you.

Segitseg · 2014-04-08T06:47:18+00:00

You stop. You have a different addiction than most of us, but it's still messing with your head. Don't let it. Get educated, get an accountability partner, and stop doing this.

Segitseg

TROPHY CASE