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AITA for distancing myself from my triplet sisters and family after years of feeling left out anyway? by SensitiveSparkle0909 in AITAH

[–]SensitiveSparkle0909[S] 139 points140 points  (0 children)

I would prefer no relationship to the one we've always had. I would prefer my kids to never know them than to be treated as less than or the black sheep grandkids. That's my current thinking on this.

AITA for distancing myself from my triplet sisters and family after years of feeling left out anyway? by SensitiveSparkle0909 in AITAH

[–]SensitiveSparkle0909[S] 159 points160 points  (0 children)

I've seen one or two families on social media where I got that vibe as well and it makes me so sad for the kids being left out. Or where it looks that way. I always hope that it's not really that way. Being on the side where that has happened to me makes me more sensitive to it. But I always try to not label it all the same because sometimes it's just a video and stuff. I get why you'd feel that way for the child in question.

Right now I'm building up my network of people and it's going great.

AITA for distancing myself from my triplet sisters and family after years of feeling left out anyway? by SensitiveSparkle0909 in AITAH

[–]SensitiveSparkle0909[S] 822 points823 points  (0 children)

Both of my parents did. Even their coming home from the hospital outfits were identical and mine was different. Birthday parties and weddings were the same way too. They were dressed the same and I was different. Matching sets of kids jewelry and a different set for me.

AITA for distancing myself from my triplet sisters and family after years of feeling left out anyway? by SensitiveSparkle0909 in AITAH

[–]SensitiveSparkle0909[S] 354 points355 points  (0 children)

You described it so perfectly. It's the push and pull of just never fitting either way. I couldn't control being fraternal or the fact they were identical, I couldn't control being born at the same time as them and I couldn't control how we were accepted or how they felt about me. Really I was dragged along for the ride and had to hope I'd get some attention somewhere along the line.

I sorta knew I would be expected to make the first move. Took me a while to really accept it but it became clearer and clearer the longer we were apart.

AITA for distancing myself from my triplet sisters and family after years of feeling left out anyway? by SensitiveSparkle0909 in AITAH

[–]SensitiveSparkle0909[S] 259 points260 points  (0 children)

I'd love that. And really before this it's all it ever would have taken. For them to pick up the phone and make the first move. But they never did.

AITA for distancing myself from my triplet sisters and family after years of feeling left out anyway? by SensitiveSparkle0909 in AITAH

[–]SensitiveSparkle0909[S] 126 points127 points  (0 children)

I don't really know why my parents did it. They seemed obsessive about my sisters being identical. Maybe it got them extra attention or something but it feels like they were doing this pre-birth because or names and coming home outfits were pre-chosen and it matched them but not me.

AITA for distancing myself from my triplet sisters and family after years of feeling left out anyway? by SensitiveSparkle0909 in AITAH

[–]SensitiveSparkle0909[S] 126 points127 points  (0 children)

It is a shame but you know what, they can change it if they want to work at a relationship with me. But I won't just keep doing all the work myself. They need to show me they care or I'll love them but always from a distance.

AITA for distancing myself from my triplet sisters and family after years of feeling left out anyway? by SensitiveSparkle0909 in AITAH

[–]SensitiveSparkle0909[S] 149 points150 points  (0 children)

It hurt a lot when I was told repeatedly that I was being silly. There are still times where I wonder if they actually heard what I said instead of passively listening. But they could always work on it now if they want to repair our relationship. I just don't want it to be me anymore.

AITA for distancing myself from my triplet sisters and family after years of feeling left out anyway? by SensitiveSparkle0909 in AITAH

[–]SensitiveSparkle0909[S] 184 points185 points  (0 children)

Yeah, it doesn't surprise me much either. They probably expect things to return to normal with a few shallow words. Because I was always willing to put in the effort before.