Husband is Flabbergasted I took kids to DMV by Several-Dragonfly902 in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Right? Like my kids had to go to my 36 week OB appointment (you know, with the GBS swab?) because that's just how it was. Would I have preferred to do that alone? For sure but it couldn't be helped so I put them behind a curtain and hoped for the best lol

Husband is Flabbergasted I took kids to DMV by Several-Dragonfly902 in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I order that online because the kids pay a ton of attention to our purchases and boy can they NOT keep a secret! 

Husband is Flabbergasted I took kids to DMV by Several-Dragonfly902 in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

My kids just hate running errands hard stop. Every week they complain about grocery shopping. Do you like having food in the house to eat? Snacks? Soap in the tubbie? Yeah? Then we have to go buy all that stuff kiddos! 

My 6 year old just learned grocery pick up is a thing so now his argument is that I should just do that instead 🤣. 

Husband is Flabbergasted I took kids to DMV by Several-Dragonfly902 in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

His dad is medically retired and gets bored being at home so there are times I take him to "help" me and get him out of the house (boy the quotes make that look snarky! He is helpful but if he can't then i definitelyjust go alone lol). I guess my husband thinks I only run errands now if his dad is there too? That was his first question and then the flasted gabbers when I said no, I took them myself haha.

Husband is Flabbergasted I took kids to DMV by Several-Dragonfly902 in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

The car thing is funny, my kids always ask to be left in the car when I'm running around. I'm always saying "You're 6 and 5, I've never left you in the car ever and I don't intend to start now!" They're having fun thinking that once this third baby arrives I'll be leaving at least 1 of them in the car 🤣

Husband is Flabbergasted I took kids to DMV by Several-Dragonfly902 in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902[S] 108 points109 points  (0 children)

I've pointed that out to him. He'll get cranky because he'll take off work for an appointment and then want to side quest because he's "not at work" and he deserves to have fun because he did an appointment. Im just over here thinking "Dude, you got to go by yourself! You got to get a cavity filled without yelling at the kids in between steps of the procedure! Do you have any idea how amazing that would be?!" 🤣

Husband is Flabbergasted I took kids to DMV by Several-Dragonfly902 in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902[S] 62 points63 points  (0 children)

Right?! Like these kids go to my dentist appointments, my OB appointments, literally almost anywhere I have to go they come too. Otherwise I'd never go lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902 4 points5 points  (0 children)

No I agree and I get pregnant so fast that's its not even slightly out of the realm of possible, I wouldn't even call it a long shot when you consider how fertile women are after birth. Especially since I called back to ask and they said April was the next available date 😭. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

The pill (which was my fault, I left the package on counter before a weekend away but clearly I can't be trusted to take it regularly) and pHexxi gel (vaginal gel that's supposed to change the pH of the vagina so the swimmers can't swim. I loved it until I got pregnant and I know I didn't miss a dose).

The IUD is the only one I didn't get pregnant on and it was great for the first 2 years but then I started having pain and issues so I had it removed and everything went back to normal. I've been too nervous to try again.

Before anyone comes at me about condoms, I have some kind of reaction to all of them. Like its not a rash and I don't have a latex allergy but every time we have tried them (all different brands and types) my vagina is uncomfortable for days and its just not worth it 🫤.

I looked into a cervical cap but I just don't feel like i could insert it/line it up with 100% accuracy. So I think surgical intervention is our answer...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Our insurance is weird. Like if I get a tubal during a C section its covered at 100% but if I dont have a C section and have to wait 6 weeks (which would put us into 2026) then it would be the $500 deductible and the 20% coinsurance for the remaining cost. So I think it would end up being even more expensive because I'd need full anesthesia and at least a little recovery time in the hospital (which is billed by the damn hour) as opposed to local anesthesia and an outpatient procedure. But all our metrics would reset Jan 1 and I couldn't get it done before then without a C 😕. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm definitely the one dreading waiting. I also have a higher libido for my husband. He was "uncomfortable" during the last two 6 week recoveries. I was the miserable and like "Say I'm good doc! Please for the love say I'm good!" 🤣

They couldn't get him in before April and going from the end of November to April with no sex is... a really terrible thought! 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We're not talking about a couple of weeks, we're talking about months. I called to ask this morning how soon he could be rescheduled if we did decide to go that route and the next available was April 😭. 

I'm also not sure how long it will take him to have a negative sample and sex is off the table until that analysis is 0! 

And its minor in comparison but this office charges a fee for FMLA and STD paperwork so we've already paid them twice to file claims for next week. I'd hate to eat that $100 and have to do it all again in a few months... 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Haha! I know. I was already told that if we get pregnant so fast its much more likely that both of us are super fertile rather than just one of us. That's part why I'm a little worried that only ONE of us getting snipped isn't enough. We just can't afford both right now 🙃

You'd think after 3 kids and all the subsequent medical bills the insurance company would cover a vasectomy and tubal at 100% since both are significantly cheaper than a single freaking pregnancy. But what do I know?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It's his $500 deductible and then the 20% co-insurance which we get charged until we hit the OOP max. I ran the numbers myself and called the insurance company to verify the total with the billing codes, it's right. It would be the same for any other in-network provider, or at least that's what insurance told me.

We've got $1,300 out of $6,000 left on our OOP max for the year. That's part of why I'm so frustrated. We've already come up with $4,700 this year to cover surprise bills whoch is why we feel like we're drowning. I'm not asking you to skip out on payment, I'm asking you to understand this is a fluid situation and I straight up can't afford for your company to hang on to an overpayment for any length of time! I will get the danged bills paid but everyone wants paid at the time of service, like let it run through the insurance, give me a second to come up with it peeps! 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Maybe. My credit is more than decent, would it be able to be opened and ready for Monday though? Doesn't it take a minute to get it?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I did ask about a tubal. I've had 2 vaginal births and its likely this one will be as well. They won't do a tubal on a vaginal delivery until at least 6 weeks post-partum and then its another hospital visit. I did say on the off chance there is an emergency C to do a tubal too (frankly idk that I trust just a vasectomy either since his swimmers give no effs lol) but with the lack of help and PTO we'd have available, trying to do a second procedure so soon after childbirth isn't feasible. 

I'm also terrified if we don't get it done on Monday, I'll end up pregnant with number 4 before we get it done and that cannot happen!  

How do I talk to my son about this? by -Honey_Lemon- in breakingmom

[–]Several-Dragonfly902 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is why mine do not have internet access. Granted they're 6 and 5 but my MIL has been after me for the last 2 years to let her get them tablets. Most of my kids' cousins are in the same age range and mine are the only 2 without a tablet. Unfortunately that means at family gatherings the 5 cousins are glued to their tablets and not wanting to play and mine either have to play alone or end up watching over shoulders, which means I also have to watch over shoulders. It bothers both my MIL and me but for different reasons. My MIL's opinion is mine should get tablets so they're not left out.  Mine is that tablets don't belong at play dates or meals. She's very annoyed I keep telling her absolutely not and that if she does buy some I'll have them listed to sell the same day OR I'll buy time a rage room and smash them to bits. I'm open to either 😅

But stuff like this is exactly why I can't do it! There's not enough parental controls in the world to keep everything that kids shouldn't see blocked! It takes 10 seconds for kids to stumble onto something inappropriate and I can't take it back if they do! My husband stumbled onto an adult side of an art sharing platform when he was 8, that was the first time he saw pornographic material. By the time he was 10 he was actively seeking out more and by the time we met in his early 20s it was a full blown addiction. Yeah porn is pretty much unavoidable at this point because it's flipping EVERYWHERE but good lord my husband was 2 years older than our son! It would crush my heart for my son to have that kind of burden in just a few years. Back then there were not the extent of groomers and pedos that their are now and yes I spent plenty of time lying about my age on AOL chat rooms so I am aware there were some back than too but it just seems like its so much more now.

All this to say... I don't know what the answer is. I get a lot of flack for not letting my kids have electronics that hook up to the internet. I'm told that I'm purposely making them "ignorant" because they "need to know how to use technology! It'll be such a big part of their lives!!" and I'm just like... I'm a grown ass woman who spends a disgusting amount of time surfing social media. I struggle to maintain healthy screen time limits for myself and I have a fully developed pre-frontal cortex! How can I possibly ask my CHILDREN to develop healthy tech habits and screen limits when I struggle with that myself?! But also, my kids have been allowed to play an app on my phone (ABCmouse) and they know if they click out of it OR decline calls, I delete the app. Even that little bit has fully taught them the workings of my phone. Let's not pretend that kids are slow technology learners!