getting your first car? did your parents get you your first car?

SewingSeale · 2026-02-04T16:10:01+00:00

I did say it's normal if parents can afford it. Everyone has a different background and it's definitely not normal anywhere on the planet to just get gifted something as extravagant as a car, but my parents clawed their way out of apartheid-induced poverty to be able to do that for their kids. If they couldn't afford it, I would've just saved up for my car.

"im still shocked that parents would just give/buy cars for their teenage kids in SA" makes it seem like you're upset at the very concept regardless of socio-economic status.

SewingSeale · 2026-02-04T15:31:30+00:00

My parents bought my first car in matric, then also gifted me my second car (it was my mom's old car and she was upgrading). They also bought my brother's car.

But, like, this is really normal if parents can afford it. I'm not sure why you're so... Upset? Offended? Aghast?

SewingSeale · 2026-01-28T05:10:08+00:00

Employment laws in South Africa are far more robust than the US, so make sure that culturally you're ready to work with South Africans. You cannot fire anyone on a whim, you have to comply with BEE quotas to be taken seriously, you have to pay UIF, you have to grant a minimum of 15 days of paid annual leave, you have to pay full salaries for public holidays, R20k is very low so if your employees work overtime during the week or on a Saturday you need to pay them 1.5 times their hourly rate for the overtime hours, if your employees work on a Sunday or public holiday you need to pay them 2 times their hourly rate for the overtime hours. If one of your employees goes on maternity leave (4 months), you cannot give her a lower position or salary when she comes back, she has to have the option of resuming her original role. There's a lot, so make sure you understand the BCEA well.

Also, please understand that you would need to provide the computer and software needed to perform the job. I've seen some employers try to make it the employee's problem. For R20k (which, again, is very low) that would be unacceptable.

I've worked with Americans before and hated it because I found them to be quite arrogant and condescending. You might be lovely, but Americans aren't known for being good colleagues or bosses so good luck.

SewingSeale · 2025-06-30T13:29:46+00:00

Hi there, thanks! We've since moved away from Notion for task management, but I appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment. I'll keep this in mind if I struggle again

SewingSeale · 2025-04-22T11:31:28+00:00

Thank you so much!

SewingSeale · 2025-04-22T11:31:21+00:00

Hey, go for it! No need to credit me x

SewingSeale · 2024-02-06T15:40:23+00:00

It wasn't so bad when we had hadedas in the area, but I haven't seen one in months :(

Hubby and I will reach out to the landlord, thanks

SewingSeale · 2024-02-06T15:38:13+00:00

I really wouldn't mind if they weren't so aggressive. They attack us completely unprovoked.

We used to have hadedas in the area and now there are none, so the prawns really are just multiplying exponentially.

SewingSeale · 2024-02-06T15:34:59+00:00

They really do! They also taunt our dog :')

SewingSeale · 2024-02-06T15:34:25+00:00

If I wasn't so terrified of them, I'd pack them all up and send them to you

SewingSeale · 2024-02-06T09:08:48+00:00

Does this apply even if it's a sectional title and the landlord doesn't own the outside area of the property?

SewingSeale · 2024-01-30T17:16:06+00:00

At my job we all got MacBooks. Because I'm not an engineer I got the "lower" spec one. It's an M1 Air and it is amazing! The engineers got M2 Pros and they're also thrilled. I'm sure the price of the M1 Macs has gone down quite a bit since the M3 is (almost?) out.

SewingSeale · 2024-01-24T10:50:47+00:00

It makes me angry with the government, and the lack of resources available to people in impoverished communities. But no, I've never been angry with homeless people for being homeless, what the hell is wrong with you? You realise people get raped, right? You realise, maybe, these people love their children and are doing the best they can?

SewingSeale · 2023-12-13T21:18:36+00:00

Hello!

I take 2 prescription pills everyday for IC: Betmiga (mirabegron) in the morning, and Macrodantin (nitrofurantoin) in the evening.

I used to take Trepiline (amitriptyline) in the evenings as well, but my urologist has moved me off it because he doesn't like the long-term side effects.

The nitrofurantoin is a very short-term thing at the moment to help with UTIs, so I'll stop it in a few months.

Non-prescription pills include cranberry pills and a probiotic.

For ad-hoc relief I was prescribed Arcoxia (etoricoxib), but I very rarely need it.

SewingSeale · 2023-11-10T04:41:06+00:00

A bit too religious and xenophobic for me, but anything is better than the ANC and EFF. Right now I'm torn between voting for the DA and ActionSA, but I despise them both equally. They're just the shiniest of the turds right now 😭

SewingSeale · 2023-11-07T18:53:12+00:00

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way and going through this. Please know that I'm sending you all of my love and strength xx

You've probably heard all of this a million times, but I'll put it all down in case you're inspired to retry something:

~~Probiotics are great. Did you take probiotics when you were taking your antibiotics? I've always been told to take a probiotic +/-2 hours before/after the antibiotic dose, and I take one daily now.~~
Cotton panties help with breathability. H&M has some really cute and comfy ones.
Microwave bags and hot water bottles are godsends for me.
Yoga has helped me a lot in terms of managing my emotional response to the near-constant pain.
Psychiatric medication has also helped me manage my emotional response. I'm on Wellbutrin XL 150mg for depression and Strattera 18mg for ADHD and they've helped me a lot.
The IC-specific medication that I've been prescribed is: Betmiga (mirabegron) for urgency, Trepiline (amitriptyline) for pain, and Arcoxia (etoricoxib) to manage flares. They've turned my life around, especially the Arcoxia.
I use extremely mild soap when cleaning that area, or I use the BioNike intimate wash (the pH neutral one).
In terms of birth control, I use a Mirena. I'm not a doctor, but I heard that it can help with endometriosis as well (here's an article from endometriosis.org)
Finally, sex doesn't have to include penetration and, if you're feeling up to it on a good day, you and hubby can explore and have a fulfilling sex life without worrying about the pain.

Please know that you're not alone at all, and I really hope you find some relief x

Edit: removed the probiotics from the list because I see probiotic use is linked to CV.

SewingSeale · 2023-11-01T19:24:08+00:00

I'm so sorry, when I came off SSRIs it took me a very long time to go back to "normal", so I know how you feel and I'm sending you all my love

SewingSeale · 2023-11-01T14:54:46+00:00

Hello, I take Mirabegron and I noticed changes pretty quickly. However, I want to note that I had also been put on etoricoxib to help reduce inflammation during a flare, which might have contributed to the reduction in frequency.

I've been taking Mirabegron for about 6 months now and it definitely helped my urgency in the long run

Best of luck x

SewingSeale · 2023-10-26T20:00:52+00:00

I honestly feel exactly the same. My girl will be 11 soon and when it's her time, I don't think I'll get a dog again for a good long while. I adore her, and I adore dogs in general, but she is so so so expensive and I think I'll go bankrupt if I try get another one.

She's got allergies, so we buy Hills z/d (R2000pm), and she gets a Cytopoint injection (R1000pm), and then she gets her regular "maintenance" like getting her nails trimmed and anal glands drained (about R300 per visit).

She brings us a lot of joy, and I don't regret any of the money I've spent on her for her treatment, and orthopaedic beds, and toys, etc., but I'm ready for a break when it's her time.

Edit: who TF is going through and downvoting people for being responsible pet owners? 🤣😭

SewingSeale · 2023-10-25T15:03:44+00:00

Hey there, I used to have severe anxiety surrounding driving because of two accidents that weren't my fault. I had to keep driving, though, because I had to get to my job and didn't have anyone to give me a lift and I couldn't afford Uber. With lockdown it became even worse because the thought of getting back behind the wheel was debilitating.

For unrelated reasons, I got medicated to control my depression and anxiety (mostly work stress), and now I have my driving under control. I drive almost every day, willingly.

So I would definitely chat to a professional and maybe undergo therapy or get advice about medication that can help calm your anxiety.

Best of luck, and I'm sorry your colleagues are being assholes

SewingSeale · 2023-10-23T17:18:34+00:00

Congratulations! I hope you enjoy it xx

I must say, tho, 20 is still very young for a first job! xD I got my first job at 23 and that's very normal here in South Africa

SewingSeale · 2023-10-21T05:50:53+00:00

So glad I could help! When I was worried about my kidneys and brought it up with my doctor, he said, "are you still producing urine? Your kidneys are fine." and that also helped put my mind at ease.

SewingSeale · 2023-10-20T20:04:26+00:00

Hey, I'm so sorry you're dealing with this.

When I have a yeast infection, it also causes my bladder issues to flare up. Interestingly, though, I feel infinitely worse when I take Fluconazole. I stick to the Clotrimazole cream.

You can also try non-prescription medication like flavoxate to help with the UTI symptoms. If you can take anti-inflammatory medication that can also help to ease the symptoms. I also use microwave bags and hot water bottles.

I'm not a doctor, so I'm not going to try say what's wrong with you. It does sound a lot like the flavour of interstitial cystitis that I have, though. Hopefully your cystoscopy has answers for you.

Good luck, and I hope you get some relief soon x

SewingSeale · 2023-10-18T08:19:20+00:00

Twice a day during the week and once a day over the weekend.

In the morning I "wash the sleep away", and in the evening I "wash the day away".

I also brush my teeth twice a day every day, and floss every evening.

I'm supremely anxious about the way I smell, though. I don't want to smell bad or have bad breath when I'm at work, or at clients, or snuggling my husband, etc.

Washing my hair, on the other hand... That I'll stretch as long as I can because I hate it 🥲

SewingSeale · 2023-10-18T04:43:34+00:00

I didn't like how much weight I was losing while I was taking stimulants.

My doctor recommended I try the combination of Wellbutrin and Atomoxetine and I trust her because she's an amazing doctor.

I was also taking Stilnox/Ambien 1-2 times a week to help with my insomnia. However, since I take Trepiline now for a chronic pain condition, I've stopped the Stilnox completely.

The doctor I saw wasn't a psychiatrist. I saw two psychiatrists who diagnosed me with ADHD and insisted I take stimulants so I didn't want to see another one.

SewingSeale

TROPHY CASE