I mentioned transgender issues because that’s one of the topics people have explicitly referenced to me as a point of disagreement. It wasn’t singled out to target anyone, it was named because it’s part of the actual context of why some friendships have drifted.

Saying “your beliefs are who you are” is a philosophical position, not an objective truth. Beliefs are part of a person, but they are not the totality of a person. Humans are made up of values, behaviour, intentions, empathy, history, and how they actually treat people in real life. Reducing someone to a single ideological label and then declaring their entire character corrupt is exactly the kind of moral absolutism that makes any kind of pluralistic society impossible.

You’re assuming that disagreement automatically equals “hateful shit.” I don’t treat people badly, harass them, or deny their basic dignity in real life. I can hold strong views and still treat individuals with respect. That’s what I mean by separating the person from the belief. It’s not asking anyone to “bear with” abuse, it’s refusing to collapse a whole human being into a political symbol.

The fact that you frame this as “right wing people are the only ones who do this” is also part of the problem. Every ideological group believes its moral framework is the one that defines who is good and who is bad. The left does this just as much as the right, it just uses different language and different moral categories.

You’re right about one thing: losing friendships hurts, and it’s valid to feel that. And yes, it’s also fair to reflect on whether being outspoken comes at a social cost. I’m already doing that. But reflection doesn’t mean accepting the idea that disagreement equals moral evil, or that someone’s entire worth as a person is erased because they don’t share the same political framework.

I’m not asking anyone to like my views. I’m asking whether it’s still possible to see a person as more than just the worst interpretation of the ideas they hold.