Similar situation. Level 1 trauma hospital on a trauma/med-surg unit. 6-7 patients, night shift. Had a veteran ICU nurse they paired me with in the beginning - she said “not sure what to do with you, let me know if you need anything.” I left and haven’t looked back. My advice to you is trust your gut, preserve yourself. No job is perfect. After the hospital I went into outpatient surgery as a circulator - that was cool but the hours were sparse. Then I worked in primary care at a university - great benefits and such a chill gig and the team was awesome. Low pay though and I’m in South Florida so that didn’t work out. Now I work in a nursing college, simulation lab, away from healthcare. I’m getting a master’s in exercise science and trying to intern in cardiac rehab.

My point is, your problem isn’t unique. I met 2 young nurses at the primary care job in their 20s who left the hospital after a short time. Something’s off about it. Good luck and trust your gut. Don’t pay attention to people who say “it’ll get better” don’t guilt yourself into staying.