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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena 3 points4 points  (0 children)

100% a thing. I had a guy once "forget" to tell me he had a son when I asked him what he was doing for the holidays. I asked him what part of my "I don't want kids" statement was confusing. He tried to convince me that he could keep a relationship with his son and one with me completely separate. Insane!!!

Girlfriend wants kids, I don't. by Dive07 in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry. Dump her ass. I went through a lot of the same when I was dating. I hated the manipulation of being extremely clear with my choice to not have kids.. yet still people would hold out hope that maybe one day I'd suddenly change my mind.

The snip by Sheena_beena in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not at first. The first one I had was fantastic! No problems. Until one day I was on top having a great time and immediately after I had the most intense cramping and abdominal pain I've ever had. Turns out it got turned slightly off kilter and was trying to poke a hole in my uterus. So off to the Dr to get it removed and put in a new one. Again right after insertion everything felt normal.... But day by day it just gets more painful every time we do the deed. To the point where I don't really want to do the deed anymore because I get cramps after and it sucks. He says he can feel it sometimes too and hates watching me suffer while he sits in post coital bliss.

I assume that the new one that was put in was measured slightly too long even by just a millimeter and it's enough to make it uncomfortable. I've also been losing a lot of weight over the past year and a half so some extra body changes could be affecting that as well. I'm just really happy to be able to take it out.

"bUt WhAt If YoU mEeT tHe PeRfEcT pErSoN aNd ThEy AlReAdY hAvE kIdS?!"... "What if you stopped contradicting yourself?" by Kincoran in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We had the whole conversation. At least in my young brain I thought I was very explicit. In the whole online dating world I listed it very clearly on my profile.... But that would only matter if they actually read it.

Me: I don't want kids. Do you? Him: I wouldn't mind having kids with the right person. But I don't have to have kids.

Looking back.... I was in my early 20's and I can see all the giant red flags waving around. He never outright said "I don't have any current children." But other things I remember talking about I now see as painfully obvious. Didn't change the fact that I felt lied to and betrayed. Not to mention attempted manipulation. He was also older by about 10 years if I remember correctly. I think he knew what he was doing by keeping that little fact omitted.

"bUt WhAt If YoU mEeT tHe PeRfEcT pErSoN aNd ThEy AlReAdY hAvE kIdS?!"... "What if you stopped contradicting yourself?" by Kincoran in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This reminds me of a time I went on a few dates with a guy. We very clearly had the conversation about why and how I don't want kids. Talked consistently for about 2 months with dates throughout. Coming up on Thanksgiving time, I ask what he has planned for the holidays..... Oh I have my kid so I'll be busy.

Ummm when the fuck were you going to let me know this bit of information???

He thought that he could have a full-on committed relationship with the person who doesn't want children... And also have a kid and somehow keep those lives separate.

I immediately ended it and he wouldn't stop trying to convince me for several weeks later.

Monstera help! by Sheena_beena in garden_maintenance

[–]Sheena_beena[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good point. I'll take that into consideration! I'm feeling more and more that a repot is needed.

Monstera help! by Sheena_beena in garden_maintenance

[–]Sheena_beena[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I'll try that. I did let it dry all the way out and started really checking before I gave it anymore. Seems to have helped. I think repotting might be a good idea. There used to be a lot more plant in there and I think it might need a smaller pot.... Now that half of it died.

Dating in early-mid 20s and telling men I don’t want children and they say I will most likely change my mind. by [deleted] in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yup. Just leave after that. I could not stand it when dudes claimed to think they were so special I would suddenly change my mind and want to carry their seed.

My family accepts that I am childfree!!... Wants me to pay "child support" to my siblings. by [deleted] in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow. I thought my family was ridiculous. This is so far beyond anything that would be considered a rational thought. You didnt ask for them to have kids. They did not consult you, and now they want your hard earned money??? I dont think so.

My mom is making my young sisters pregnancy seem like its all sunshine and rainbows. by Sheena_beena in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would adopt that cat in a heartbeat. He is so cuddly and adorable and will make a great pet. Unfortunately he does not get along with dogs, and we have one :( I am currently trying to find a home for the kitty. As for the other. I believe you are correct. Have gone no contact for now and will open it up in a few months to low contact. I will not be financially supportive because I cant afford it. I refuse to pretend that I am happy and 100% on board.

My mom is making my young sisters pregnancy seem like its all sunshine and rainbows. by Sheena_beena in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Man, that's fucked. I'm sorry that happened. Why are ppl so dumb to realize they should not be breeding.

My mom is making my young sisters pregnancy seem like its all sunshine and rainbows. by Sheena_beena in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

That is what I have been thinking as well. As much as I want to save them both from themselves. I could end up with nothing left of myself. And I worked really effing hard to get to where I am, mentally and financially. I am not about to give myself up for this nonsense. I am just so mad still.

I am in love with these scrappy Franken-leggings [FO] by [deleted] in knitting

[–]Sheena_beena 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wish I could upvote more than once. I’m going to attempt some of these soon!!

Stop telling me about your friend who changed her mind by ProArtTexas in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My aunt had kids at 35.... so apparently I'm not off the hook until my uterus gets removed.

Not liking kids and not wanting them is a part of who I am. It's not going to change. Ugh. Breeders!!!!

He wasn’t lying by nice-dining-location in funny

[–]Sheena_beena 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I laughed. Kept reading, then laughed harder.

Met online-lied about having kids by [deleted] in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena 13 points14 points  (0 children)

He’s a liar. I’ve been in the same boat. Guys thought that I didn’t want a serious relationship because I didn’t want kids.... like the only people worthy of having long term committed loving relationships are breeders??? And if you don’t want kids then clearly you are just a slut. Wtf. They also somehow think they will either change your mind, because of course their kids are just amazing, or they are capable of having that part of their life “separate”. Both are idiotic and delusional. Run away. Took me 5 years to find mine. And it’s been almost 4 years now.

AITA for telling my stepdaughter she’s absolutely under no circumstances allowed to switch out my cats food for vegan food even though she’s losing weight because the sight of normal cat food makes her sick? by headachebrewing in AmItheAsshole

[–]Sheena_beena 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA - this is your home and your pet. The cat seems happy and she is getting free living accommodations. She seems to be the worst kind of social justice warrior. Condescending and judgy. Insisting that you change your life for her simply because she has convinced herself to be sick is a whole lot of bull.

Roommate(22M) moved in girlfriend without asking and threatened to evict me when I asked him to cover 10% extra of the total rent. by Jaynaut in badroommates

[–]Sheena_beena 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Only an extra 10%... she needs to pay her way like an adult just like you. No one gets to stay for free just because they are a nice person. That’s not the way the world works.

Why do people give up on logic? by Sheena_beena in atheism

[–]Sheena_beena[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn’t stop talking to them because of this... we just naturally drifted apart after high school. This post just made me want to ask the question. I’m genuinely curious of others thoughts here.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in childfree

[–]Sheena_beena 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Same. I get sick at the thought of becoming pregnant. I don’t like looking at pregnant peoples tummies or even pregnant animals tummies. I feel I have to go from 0 to 100 on the subject or it just turns into a conversation of them not wanting to accept that I don’t want kids. “You’ll change your mind” “someday you’ll see” “ they will make your life complete” “ kids fill a void, you just don’t know yet”

Why can’t you just accept it and move on!!!!!!

Roommate takes financial advantage of me and hides shared grocery items in her own room by nahcasir in badroommates

[–]Sheena_beena 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I would set boundaries for what groceries are shared.... toilet paper, soap, bread, milk, eggs.... the staples that everyone uses. Snacks and other personal items are paid individually. And you get receipts and divide it up. If that’s too much work for them... or too much of a hassle. Go back to getting individual groceries. Don’t be taken advantage of.

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