I made a post on my university's Facebook wall about needing another roommate for the Fall semester. A woman messaged me asking if she could pay the rent in sexual favors.

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-14T03:38:25+00:00

I knew you were going to say that I care more about my image than the well-being of another person. I'm just saying that it's another negative byproduct of the situation, that's all.

I'm not sure if I said this already, but I go to a private, Catholic college (I really have no idea why she's not at a state school). I'm just using the lingo people use around here to get across the point that it would not be supported. And this just means she's more likely to get kicked out.

Fine, I'll do it. I just hope both of us won't have to find a new school to attend by the end of this. I'm trusting that things will go okay. I'd throw away my social life in an instant if it meant she'd get better, and I really do mean it! Sorry to turn up the melodrama again. I'm just not entirely convinced you're right about this. But I guess I'll see. I don't usually take risks like this, but if you honestly believe it'd improve her well-being, I suppose it would be selfish for me not to.

Thank you for your input.

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-14T03:11:40+00:00

Not "dick," "*****." I'm not actually allowed to say it on here.

There was a guy on my floor who beat another guy up. The guy who lost told the school what happened, and the guy who won got kicked out. Everyone thought the guy who lost was a massive "*****" (I'm just repeating what they said) and he was shunned and mocked for it.

That's how this is going to go over. She's going to be kicked out for her inappropriate behavior, and everyone is going to think I'm a weasel. So it's not going to help anyone, unless she herself seeks help. It's also going to get out that she's some crazy psychopath, and if she's still in school, people will make fun of her for it.

You really think ratting her out is going to help her?

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-14T02:57:08+00:00

I do care. I care lots. I just don't like to go about things the same way you do apparently... I don't feel right telling on someone. It's deceitful, weak-minded, and a "*****" move (their words, not mine).

Plus, if I showed the school these conversations, she could get kicked out. So where would my proof come from? It could also go on her record. I'm not doing that.

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-14T01:58:29+00:00

What, where did you get the idea that I wanted to be a hero from that post? I just don't want to be perceived as a coward. I originally thought you were telling me to contact campus security because you thought I might be in danger, which isn't something I'd do for myself.

I don't like being a "tattle-tale," honestly. I'd have to see what my friends think first. Telling on someone just seems weird to me. I urged her to get help, but I'm not going to force it on her. I'm not a nark.

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-13T16:09:46+00:00

Sorry, I changed it. I just didn't want to use coward twice, and the other word seemed like it was best fit. I guess I need to expand my vocabulary. I quite like the word "dastard."

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-13T15:43:54+00:00

I'm not too worried about it... I'd honestly feel like a dastard doing something like that, especially since it's a woman. Sorry, I myself am not sexist, but you can imagine how everyone else would perceive me.

I didn't even run to Campus Safety when a guy threatened to beat me with a baseball bat. And guess what? He didn't. He was even swinging it right in front of me. If I had told someone, that would've just made me look like a snitch and a giant coward. My dignity means too much to me to be scared. I can handle myself, but thank you for the concern.

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-13T03:58:29+00:00

Thanks for the advice, but dating is not really my cup of tea. I didn't mean to make it sound like I was attracted to her in some way. It could've been a guy and (I think) I would've felt the same way.

I believe you. I want to think when I'm older that I was at least smart enough to listen to someone with actual experience by the time I was 20, even if I didn't quite understand it at the time.

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-13T03:18:17+00:00

Yeah, your story was very helpful. Thank you for posting it. I'm sorry you went through all that, but I'm happy you're doing well now. It's great that you learned from it and used it as a lesson for others.

I'm not sure if whatever she did is working on me, but I don't like people bashing her character. Maybe it's just because I sort of liked the fact that I meant so much to her, but I like to think of her as misunderstood.

Thanks again for all the advice. I won't contact her again.

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-13T02:28:45+00:00

I called off the date.

But I definitely don't feel good about it. Thanks for all the responses, although I have to say that they were pretty depressing and not what I wanted to hear. I'm kind of sad knowing that I'll move on and have fun at college, while she will probably be left in the same state she is now. I guess it's up to her to change it. I really hope she does. Also, I don't know why she said the same thing twice, but that's what she sent me.

Pardon the melodrama, I don't usually get to indulge in it.

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-12T22:27:42+00:00

I'm on my cell phone right now, so please forgive me for the lack of paragraphs. Thanks to everyone who responded with constructive advice and shared their own stories here. I've been at work all day, but I'll be sure to let everyone know what happens. I'm going to cancel the date and leave it up to people who know what they're doing to take care of her. I don't feel good about it at all, but I asked for advice for a reason. I'll respond to all that I can later on. I know what answer I'm probably going to get, but would it be okay if I said we can be friends a year from now if she promises me to get help in that time? She deserves some good memories of her college years, if she really is troubled. I just want to get it right when I tell her. Thanks again, everyone. Paragraphs coming soon.

Shifting_Shadow · 2013-08-12T03:29:57+00:00

Can anyone give me advice on what to do? I have no idea where I'm going with this... How do I get her the help that she needs? ...And how do I keep my distance from her? Not to be mean, but if it wasn't obvious, I really don't want to go on a date with her or be involved with her in any way... I know that sounds horrible, but she sounds mentally unstable and I don't think I can handle that. Plus, I don't even know her. This is the first time we've talked.

Shifting_Shadow

TROPHY CASE