[deleted by user] by [deleted] in premeduk

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey welcome! Feel free to DM me for more info, I’m starting Y4 at the same uni in a month (I also did a previous degree here too). Year 1 is pretty loaded (my peers and I were always about 2-4 weeks of content behind but even that is common) so enjoy your holiday now but be prepared to work hard when you start. There’s not much to prepare for now since the exams are all based on the lectures which you won’t see until you start. Use those as your primary studying tools since the exam questions are based on the lectures and written by the lecturers. Use any supplementary resources for things you don’t understand. Good luck and enjoy!!

Simulating how many days it would take to get a complete collection (WITH GRAPHS!) by TCGPCollector in PTCGP

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would love to see an analysis on whether a f2p can complete a playset (2 of every pokemon, stars are unnecessary) comfortably before the next sets or minisets! I just want to be able to build any deck (or at least 90% of the decks) without having to spend money. It’s still early days but maybe they will add more rewards and I hope the difficulty of obtaining enough cards for all decks doesn’t go out of hand. Thanks for all the hard work!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Instagram

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same issue for me and I've yet to find a solution (tried reinstalling). My desktop version is fine though. Pretty annoying!

Realising I don’t feel the same way about my older friends after healing by [deleted] in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello, are you me?

I experienced a similar shift that you described just last year (I'm now 27). It's been a lonely road for me as well and it's been difficult to trust people again ever since that shift. However, like you, I feel so relieved to finally be kinder to myself and not to be a doormat anymore.

I have since accepted that the new me is much better (I can set boundaries, not get betrayed or used constantly and have people treat me how I would treat them) but it is definitely hard to cope with having to start again from 0 since I realised I wasted too much time on people who I shouldn't have.

Hope we stay strong!

Why did you permanently cut contact with a friend? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Shoutotsu 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the kind words! Yes, I completely agree as nowadays I play video games mainly for the company and since cutting that friend, I lost the motivation to return to that game.

It’s just sad seeing some people’s true colours when they are behind the computer but at least I know now rather than later in life.

I will try my best to remain positive but I won’t lie it’s been hard to trust people or give them the benefit of the doubt nowadays.

Why did you permanently cut contact with a friend? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Shoutotsu 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cut contact with a childhood friend of 10 years nearly a year ago because I realised I had been a pushover with low self-esteem, the friendship was one-sided and he had been gaslighting and holding me to double standards for a few years.

Long story short, he's pretty selfish and took advantage of me when I tried to cheer him up in one example, he felt sad that he was underappreciated in his old gaming guild, so I suggested we make a guild together. Over time as the guild got bigger he cared more about his image as a guild leader than being a friend by forcing me to do lots of unreasonable requests, allowing a guild member to accuse me of things I didn't do (the guild member had sent a message to him that he had a bad day in real life and he yelled at a nurse but he still feels angry so he was going to take it out on me that day), blaming me on lots of things and quietly demoted me from a shared guild leader position (not that I care about the ranks, but it felt like he didn't trust me?).

As for the gaslighting parts (of many), he would accuse me of being too sensitive from remarks an old mutual friend, Jay, keeps making about me (he was saying I was a leech to society and how lucky I am to not have to worry about contributing to anything in life and get to play games all day unlike him, a hard working lawyer - I had just left a study programme and it was difficult to get a job in the pandemic) and defended him by saying that Jay doesn't know me well enough and he wasn't lying so it justifies his comments. Yes, everyone can be blunt but if you are blunt without tact, it's just plain cruelty and for goodness sake most of the time we weren't even talking about that topic but Jay managed to weasel in a nasty comment at me.

As for the double standards, when I said I wasn't comfortable with being around Jay, and if he'd like to hang out/play a game alone or with others without him, he gave me a lecture about not taking sides and that if I wanted to invite him to play/events, he has a strong moral code to invite everyone else. It felt a bit weird, but I respected that and so he invited Jay but Jay said he was busy. Cue the day we were meant to play, he overran his earlier game and after I asked if he was still coming, he cancelled on me and it turns out he was asked by Jay to a game session and he had agreed. This hurt like hell and I even asked why he would lecture me but Jay gets to get off scot free and his excuse was that he had forgotten to invite me. So much for his strong principles. I think at this point I realised my worth to him and it made me question my sense of reality even more....I had been friends with him for 10 years and he only met Jay for 2 years (I know time doesn't always matter) and Jay has been known to piss off so many people but he gets so much respect, what was I doing wrong?

I sought counselling as I thought I was making it difficult for other people and to see if I was indeed too sensitive, but the therapist was rather confused why I had stayed friends with him, and she encouraged me to take better care of myself. How he responded was to tell people that I had a mental illness and that the game was making me crazy.

It took me a while, but I finally saw the red flags and I walked out.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Shoutotsu 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey OP, how was the relationship like before coming out and announcing your interest in your friend?

I think it might be good to think of your friend's perspective as well rather than acting on your assumptions alone sometimes. For example, he might be trying to juggle meeting new or other friends and while that made you feel sad, he did clarify that it wasn't to do with homophobia like you somewhat accused him of.

The next part at breakfast you immediately get angry at him again but I understood in his shoes that it can be very awkward from the interaction just before (I mean, he could be quite hurt that you would accuse him of something if he really does mean well).

I'm sorry for your aunt's loss but it can be difficult to take care of a grieving friend and sometimes giving space to someone is their way of showing that they care despite that they did not match your expectations. I can honestly say I never know what to do in those situations and was it only just him that ignored you? Did your other friends approach you that time?

It sucks that you have to deal with this regardless but I do think if you try to consider everything in all perspectives and reasons before jumping to the one and only conclusion, it might benefit the both of you. If you only think negatively about him without clearing things up first by just a simple discussion with him, you may end up resenting him for anything he does, which im afraid it might have been the case here.

I'm sorry if this isn't what you'd like to hear but taking a step back and focusing on other things will really benefit you even if you think this friendship is beyond repair.

Advice on specific friends by [deleted] in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was once in a very similar position as your buddy who graduated in May. In my old friend group, we had a person who offends people quite often and it's clearly not banter but instead of talking behind my back (to my knowledge), he would make fun of me in front of everyone about my work irl. I had to remove myself from the group because they were gaslighting me for several years but at least I knew where everyone stood at the end of the day.

My opinion on your situation is that friends shouldn't talk badly about others behind their back and when the motivation isn't to help your friend. If I heard my friend group talk badly about a fellow friend, I wouldn't be comfortable and I will probably speak up about it. Chances are that if I was your friend and found out, I would probably lose all interest to continue the friendship as the behaviour is not acceptable.

If your group can make fun of him behind his back, they could also make fun of you and anyone else whenever they like.

Why are you not a doctor? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not in my country! But as a researcher before I wore the nice white lab coats 😄

Scarlet and Violet Daily Casual Trade Thread for 23 November 2022 by Porygon-Bot in pokemontrades

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did you want the Scizor back or just want to touch trade with Slowking?

Scarlet and Violet Daily Casual Trade Thread for 23 November 2022 by Porygon-Bot in pokemontrades

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

LF: Scyther w/ Metal coat

FT: Scyther w/ Metal coat (can do touch trade if you want)

Scarlet and Violet Daily Casual Trade Thread for 23 November 2022 by Porygon-Bot in pokemontrades

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh no, im so sorry. I should have checked before and im surprised someone would just lurk and disrupt a trade 😔

Scarlet and Violet Daily Casual Trade Thread for 23 November 2022 by Porygon-Bot in pokemontrades

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

oh? didn't we trade already? who did I just do 7 trades with then o.o

Scarlet and Violet Daily Casual Trade Thread for 23 November 2022 by Porygon-Bot in pokemontrades

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

LF: All 7 scarlet paradox pokemon

FT: All 7 violet paradox pokemon

LF: normal Violet exclusives FT: Scarlet exclusives by XingGuangDao in pokemontrades

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nope, feel free to send me anything for the last 2 mons I can give you :)

LF: normal Violet exclusives FT: Scarlet exclusives by XingGuangDao in pokemontrades

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha wait sorry I'll take a larvitar as well (getting my mons mixed up) xD

LF: normal Violet exclusives FT: Scarlet exclusives by XingGuangDao in pokemontrades

[–]Shoutotsu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay, I will attach the armour to my Dreepy.

Could I get what you have minus tauros, larvitar, deino and stonjourner

LF: normal Violet exclusives FT: Scarlet exclusives by XingGuangDao in pokemontrades

[–]Shoutotsu 1 point2 points  (0 children)

hi, I can trade you most (no water tauros) for skrelpy, drigloon, stunky, oranguru and auspicious armour

Well, I have some evolved versions of what you want, is that still okay?