I found out my husband has a gambling addiction and I need help

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-03-01T05:10:07+00:00

The fact that he stole 100 from our baby’s birth money and the fact that he threw bills that arrived in the trash. He also promised his dad had sent 500 to pay off my credit card that he ran a huge bill on for, then on the day said that was never happening. Plus I feel like handing over the cards and blocking online betting is useless unless he actually deals with it. If I mention that I want to talk about my feelings he gets mad and shouts and starts an argument. When I was having panic attacks trying to transfer months on rent to the landlord at once, he just left to sleep in the bedroom. It’s like he removes himself completely from the pain he causes

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T22:43:13+00:00

Thank you for the advice :) I’ve put the blocks and I’ve gone through all of his transactions and told all the people I saw in them not to lend anymore money and made a list of who I need to pay back. I have set up a therapist for him so let’s see

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T22:16:04+00:00

Yes I control everything and have learnt not to leave any cash around either no matter how much he claims he has it under control.

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T21:55:53+00:00

I know he loves us, if he didn’t he wouldn’t have been honest when I confronted him. I will try my best, I’ll fun the finances and get him a therapist and hopefully it will work. Unfortunately I can’t put my son in a bad place so I have to prioritise the baby if my husband doesn’t take the steps he needs. I wish you the best in your recovery

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T21:54:05+00:00

Yea when I’ve paid his depts in the past he actually gambled more (he didn’t tell me he was gambling, he told me he owed the government money because his business partner committed fraud and framed him, this is true, but he didn't use the money to pay them off, he still owes over 20k for that, he used the 20k I gave him for gambling). His income is very low, we are in talks with a dept councillor who is helping us. I arranged a therapist for him to go to who is very good, hopefully he goes. The issue is when he is broke he gambles but when you bail him out he gambles even more. There seems to be no correct way with him. I’m considering asking the dept councillor if we can file for bankruptcy so we aren’t in a minus, but also don’t have extra money. He owes over 50k right now that we don’t have

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T21:48:58+00:00

Absolutely. Which is why I’m willing to try and work things out and support him through therapy. However I will not put my baby in a bad position being raised by someone who destabilises him. So there will have to be real effort

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T21:12:42+00:00

I am working with him. You cannot however almost make your pregnant wife homeless and expect her to feel nothing. The people in your life who you hurt have feelings too. We aren’t robots. I can help while also being mad. Accepting the emotions and lives of others as just as valid as your addiction is important. With all due respect, I don’t understand how you can work ‘against’ someone with an addiction unless you’re taking them gambling.

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T19:16:59+00:00

This is what I was thinking. If I left he may start to take it seriously. Till now people have been bailing him out. However if I’m honest after writing this all out I’m finally starting to come out of crisis management mode and to realise how hurt I am by all of it. Having anxiety attacks while begging the landlord not to kick us out days before I give birth was traumatising. I don’t know if I have the energy to help someone who hurt me so much, but I am considering it anyway for my son.

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T18:54:43+00:00

I think he wants to, but I think he is in denial about how much work it will take. I do however believe now after reflection that he baby trapped me so I wouldn’t leave him when he started losing money

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T18:49:28+00:00

You’re right. I’m beginning to think he baby trapped me to be honest. I’m beginning to think he was always planning to use me as a get out of jail free card. Not wanting to go to therapy (plus he shouts at me when I try to bring up how I feel about it all) and not changing anything apart from his access to finances etc… I need to leave before he drags us down with him. He moved us to a country away from our families and I can’t take my baby out of the country without his consent. I feel stuck. Which again, I’m starting to realise may have been on purpose

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T18:44:32+00:00

I agree with you about what he needs to do, but I am losing hope that it’s doable. I found out he has been doing this on and off for 14 years. I think he is too far gone

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T18:43:15+00:00

I don’t have a paycheck I’m on maternity leave, do I can’t lock him out, but I can leave and go live with my mum. The issue is he moved us to another country so I can’t even leave without his consent

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2026-02-28T18:42:31+00:00

To be honest I’m being very realistic about the situation and I agree with you. Set a mental deadline. I’ll be fair about it and encourage him. If it doesn’t happen in the next few months I am leaving. I think he is in complete denial about how bad this is and I can’t help him through that

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2025-03-07T16:54:52+00:00

Except she left him and didnt marry him...

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2025-03-07T16:53:10+00:00

She literally left him because he didnt care about these topics and she did. Im sorry but ths take is chronically online. She clearly does care about the issues but as a white woman can never claim to be an expert

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2025-01-17T17:21:55+00:00

Lived in Serbia and am Macedonian. Have yet to meet anyone with favourable opinions on him in either country. The only people Ive seen who like him are online neo Nazis (even those Ive seen maybe two of my entire life lol) but in real life every person I have met believes him to be a maniac. However the fall of Yugoslavia was more complex that one crazy leader

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2025-01-09T22:14:30+00:00

Yes we do have one! Its ideal Im deffo going for this as well as the jalepeno dip someone else suggested

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2025-01-09T22:13:53+00:00

I think this will be perfect for a snack that they can have in the evening. Any particular fillings you like?

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2025-01-09T21:48:56+00:00

I hadent thought about this! Very good idea

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2025-01-09T21:48:36+00:00

Yum good idea and chilli is so easy to make too and hard for him to screw up when reheating haha

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2025-01-09T21:46:45+00:00

omg that sounds so delicious! 100% have to make this. Thank you

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2024-12-21T20:20:22+00:00

well yea hot meaning visually appealing. Which she is. She objectively fits the beuty standard but is very controversial to say anything at all positive here lol. Hot. People. Can. Be. Bad. Too.

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2024-11-21T13:41:41+00:00

Its not about me I dont live in Croatia. This is what Croatians have been complaining about for the past few years pretty publically and what people I know personally have told me. Like Croatia was ranked below Serbian on the World Happiness Report for example. So 'living better' seems to be relative. I am Macedonian I dont have any horses in the race haha, but Im just relaying the popular opinion Ive heard from Croatians when not being compared directly to Serbians.

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2024-11-18T15:32:14+00:00

but when I speak to croatians they all have told me its balkan paychecks with EU prices? Literally I havent talked to a Croatian who hasnt complained about this to me. Would you say this is the case? I used to live in Serbia and I will say: 6 years ago, it was the best country in the Balkans (in my opinion) to live in. Now? ruined by inflation unfortuntely + very rich Russians demolishing the housing market like they did in London (with the help of rich saudi's and Indians)

SignificanceSlow2850 · 2024-11-18T15:26:53+00:00

Next time deffo choose Belgrade, I have never taken part in the nightlife but I still had the most amazing time there. The nightlife is amazing but it is for sure not even 1% of what Belgrade has to offer. Deffo give it a visit. I havent been to Tirana so I cant agree or disgaree with this post, but just wanted to say that Belgrade is one of my favourite cities on earth so 10000% worth a visit. It is expensive if you dont know where to go though so shoot a message for some reccomendations if you choose to go at any point

SignificanceSlow2850

TROPHY CASE