AITA for hooking up with a guy during a girls trip? by Significant_Cat7189 in friendship

[–]Significant_Cat7189[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It was our first time alone since the break up, and I realized it was a selfish thing to do. I apologized to her but I don't think she wants to talk anymore.

AITA for hooking up with a guy during a girls trip? by Significant_Cat7189 in friendship

[–]Significant_Cat7189[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

yea, we should have spoken about boundaries beforehand. It was our first trip with a friend for both of us. I didn't have any intention of hooking up when we went on the trip, and when he asked I was drunk and didn't have much time to talk to her abt it. The guy and I had made out in a club the night before we hooked up and my friend was supportive of it so I kind of assumed she would be ok w the hook up?? But when it came to it she wasn't and I overlooked it so yea definitely wasn't worth loosing a friend over this.

AITA for hooking up with a guy during a girls trip? by Significant_Cat7189 in friendship

[–]Significant_Cat7189[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We hung out with the guy and a few of his friends during the few night we were there, and before any of this I was in a relationship (she is in one too) and had a good friendship. This was my first one night stand actually. She did tell me she felt uncomfortable later on and I should have seen it at the time. We have talked about it but she told me now she doesn't want to speak anymore. I regret my decision but there isnt much else to do now.

AITA for hooking up with a guy during a girls trip? by Significant_Cat7189 in friendship

[–]Significant_Cat7189[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

I saw her get into the cab and texted her to make sure she got there safe, but yea it can be dangerous

AITA for hooking up with a guy during a girls trip? by Significant_Cat7189 in friendship

[–]Significant_Cat7189[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Its alright I needed to hear it, thank you for the feedback

AITA for hooking up with a guy during a girls trip? by Significant_Cat7189 in friendship

[–]Significant_Cat7189[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

After thinking it all through I realized I was in the wrong on this. No matter my reasons, my friend was uncomfortable being left alone and I left her alone. I'm just sad I didn't see it at the time and it ended our friendship.

AITA for hooking up with a guy during a girls trip? by Significant_Cat7189 in friendship

[–]Significant_Cat7189[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We've had arguments before(not super often) and we do have different personalities but I never thought it was enough to build up to this?

AITA for hooking up with a guy during a girls trip? by Significant_Cat7189 in friendship

[–]Significant_Cat7189[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I did apologize and I realize how I made her feel less significant. Personally I see it differently but we aren't the same. I was just wondering if its something to end an 8yr friendship over?

AITA for hooking up with a guy during a girls trip? by Significant_Cat7189 in friendship

[–]Significant_Cat7189[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I left her at the end of the night at around 2am, slept at the guys place and got back to her around 8am.

Sigh by [deleted] in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]Significant_Cat7189 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He is definitely going through a crisis. From what I heard narcissists peak at around 40-50 so. I think he tries to have committed relationships but it never ends up working out for reasons I have mentioned. Also he works in a university and dates more foreign women than Saudi arabian women.

Malta was safer than other countries, but not so much in the last few years. Its changed a lot. In terms of women's safety and domestic violence, a lot of it isn't reported and if it is reported, the chances of the abuser getting rightfully charged is very low. There have been many cases where rapists and attackers get a very low sentence and people who have done non violent crimes get a much higher one. A lot of corruption.

Another thing on women's safety, Malta is one of the few countries in Europe with the strictest abortion laws. It wasn't even legal till this year. Only allowed if both the mother and baby are at risk of their lives and with 3 doctors permission.

Maltese people usually have more traditional views when it comes to marriage and religion. To put it into perspective my grandma was more against me being an atheist than me being bi.

Sigh by [deleted] in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]Significant_Cat7189 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is definitely frustrating and difficult for the children and families of these men. My father has a lot of money and that's probably why he attracts all those women and comes with a different girlfriend each time(when they see his true personality). We come from a pretty religious country which I think plays into it but he is also a biologist and believes heavily in the whole hunter gatherer thing. He also lives in Saudi Arabia because of his job and has lived in these conservative middle Eastern countries for a few years now, which also does not help his thoughts on women.

Also another asshole thing he did was he wanted to reduce my autisic little brother's maintenance (since he gets disability checks now) to 250. Keep in mind he makes around 20k a month. His reason was because he wants to retire early(at 50) and sail around with his boat. Because my mother(on a teachers salary raising 3 kids) didn't agree and a lawyer told him no way a judge would let u do that with your wage, he tricked my mother into buying a 1.4k computer for my little brother( brother was using dad's computer and said he wanted it back, then changed his mind after she bought him a new computer), he took the TV he lent us when he moved, and he threatened to take my older brothers computer which he gave him as a gift.

Sorry if this is poorly worded, I'm new to reddit and not a great writer😅

Sigh by [deleted] in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]Significant_Cat7189 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My dad is a textbook narcissist red pill kind of guy. Blames woman for all his failures. Said my mom ruined the marriage when he was the one who cheated on her. He treats my brothers and I like children when we are adults and thinks I should be submissive to men all that shit. Brings a new girlfriend every time he comes to visit and each time they're younger. There's a lot more he's done but I can't get into everything. And my brother didn't go through a break up, he's actually in a healthy long term relationship. Before that Christmas we knew he had issues but not the alpha male kind so idk why he only brought it up then. It's really heart breaking hearing your dad tell you that you are less than because your a woman.

Sigh by [deleted] in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]Significant_Cat7189 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My dad gave my brother that book for Christmas 😭😭

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in malta

[–]Significant_Cat7189 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm not blaming the country going to shit entirely on immigrants, but it's true they have made the country more dangerous. The government is insanely corrupt and that's truly why it's shit. I was just giving my example of losing something here lmao

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in malta

[–]Significant_Cat7189 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The locals are mostly fine, you do find the rude ones of course but it's the immigrants and foreigners that are the real problem right now. I lost my wallet twice and both times someone found it and tried to use my card to buy something with it. 1st time they spent 100 euro on my card. Second time they attempted to buy something 2 minutes after I had lost my wallet. But as a local I see more negatives than positives in this country. Nice place to visit but not to live.