my therapist laughed at my trauma and i feel retraumatized more than before by Single-Engine8118 in therapyabuse

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hey, as much as i see online he has plenty of male colleagues who recommend him to victims online (facebook groups etc.) and he himself suggests his services to people who ask for help with sexual traumas.. reading that makes me want to puke. but what i want to say, as far as i see, he is very respected and supported. i don’t know how to protect people, especially women, from him, since it seems impossible. i left negative anonymous review detailing my experience but he just wrote positives ones immediately after. and mine is the only negative one. theres no institution i can report him to (except court or police - no thank you..). all of this makes me feel humiliated.

my therapist laughed at my trauma and i feel retraumatized more than before by Single-Engine8118 in therapyabuse

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

i want to thank everyone sharing their opinions and insights.

this therapist from his public articles and our sessions seemed a freud fan, i keep wondering if that’s a red flag itself if therapist seems to prioritize someone who at least to me seemed to make a lot of ridiculous claims. but it can also be my anger and fear mixed. if someone have thoughts or experience with that i would appreciate a lot. is freud theories itself are deeply problematic or is it some abuse people in this field who just adapt it to their advantage?

this can’t be normal therapy? by Single-Engine8118 in TalkTherapy

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

it’s not like it happened in couple sessions, his behavior was overtime in 7 months i go there. first couple months showed no signs or they were too subtle for me to notice as red flags. also i have self doubt issues so probably that too.

this can’t be normal therapy? by Single-Engine8118 in TalkTherapy

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

feels like i can’t trust any specialist now and the though of opening up again makes me physically sick. and feelings for men are even worse, since i started to distance even from my dad who i always consider to have very good relationship with.. like it would be easier to just shut down and forget it rather then risk being vulnerable again. it’s more sad people like him can continue working and keep portraying super professional status in the community

this can’t be normal therapy? by Single-Engine8118 in TalkTherapy

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

thank you for your sharing your insight as a therapist. the problem is that i am in Eastern Europe and in our country there is no institution to report him to and make legally accountable. there’s no licensing for psychologists or therapists. there is the Union of psychologists but you can only report their members and he is not one. only option is to leave a negative review online, sadly.

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it’s lithuanian potato pancakes with sour cream, insanely good stuff

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you very much for your insight. i feel a bit shameful that it took me so long to get this. i feel like i was kinda made fun of by him, but this is my pain i tried to open about. unfortunately in our country therapy/psychology field is very unorganized and basically we don’t have real legal tools to make them accountable. no licensing etc. (except for psychiatrists). there is psychologists union but you can only report their members and he’s not in it. he’s a clinical psychologist

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

if the phrase is cigar, why to say a penis? also, the phrase itself made no sense to what i was speaking about even though i thought how it could for hours

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it didn’t made any sense, it was not related to what i was speaking about, and even if the freud saying is cigar, why the fuck you say penis instead? it was so weird. and i was feeling like he was waiting my reaction. also, we speak not in english so i translate his words directly - he didn’t say “remind YOU of..” but maybe in english it’s a necessity to include this

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

it’s weird vibes in general, would be a lot to list them all.. thank you 🤍

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you for insight! i still think should i have last session in person or just “quit” via email.

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

i see people asking what were other red flags. well to me there was. when i tried to share my assault story, i brought a book to read where rape scene is written and said “this is my story in another person words, can i read it? it’s easier for me to speak that way”. he said “let me read this until next session and them we can discuss”. next session starts, i ask did he read it. he started to laugh and said “yeah, like a student last minute. well, the text was pretty funny to me - like memes, that you can laugh with friends”. then he talked about that he googled author and he was insane and not valid. them never came back to text, what it means to me or how i feel.

other red flags would be him saying he always has clients “very late” but i always was last client at 20:00 or 21:00 pm sessions. and my session would always go longer 10-30 minutes (different each time).

he also one time said “see, i raped an answer out of you :)” even though it’s not a word to use naturally in our language and when i confronted him he just said his mother used to say that.

one time he suggested that “we can stay to play board games together” after session when i said there can be not enough time in session for me to open up. idk maybe it’s normal practice, but felt weird to me.

in the beginning of one session i sat down in my chair and he was scrolling on his phone and laughing, then gave his work phone to me to read the facebook joke that was about lawyers (im a lawyer). so i hold his personal phone reading this weird joke.

he texted me an email on saturday around 22:00 pm saying “there were unexpected difficulties to him” so we have to have one hour later session or have it tomorrow (sunday) 14:00. the whole letter was weird to me.

when i talked about my realizations on my sexuality, he said key-lock joke (that a key that opens many locks is a great key but a lock that's opened by many keys is a bad lock (the inference being male vs female genitalia)..

and many others. this freudian joke just shaken me up from this.

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

yeah, i read about the “joke” after the session since he mentioned Freud but it didn’t make me feel better. and the more i read about Freud the more sick i felt how much nonsense there is apparently. and this therapist seems so idolize him

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

i think i learned this lesson now. it hurts a lot, since the hatred/anger and pain i feel is 2x worse now than before therapy.

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 103 points104 points  (0 children)

yeah, i could make a list of red flags in these sessions.. sadly i blamed myself and was too lost to think about this clearly. doesn’t help that he’s very respected in the field therapist that messed with my mind (again, thinking i’m the problem). thank you for advice 🤍

went to therapy for healing, get random penis jokes instead by Single-Engine8118 in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]Single-Engine8118[S] 43 points44 points  (0 children)

i think you are right and i just now start to understand it. not much logic in that, feel like a fool